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New user. 2 days in. Brain dump


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(@fidelio)
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Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 1
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Well I couldn't let the last two days go by without sharing this with somebody so sorry if I blather on for a bit and I am hoping that I do not breach any forum rules. I found them once but can't find them again. Firstly I will say that I have been reading this forum and it has been an eye-opener, both in terms of learning but also in terms of its maturity and reasonable behaviour. Next I have to confess I did not purchase an Aneros but a rather expensive vibrating version. Despite not having the correct item I thought I would use the advice here as it seem to make a lot of sense to me. After two days of giving it a go I purchased the helix this morning.

As it may be of help to other beginners I thought I might share what I've done and what the results are. First of all I followed the general advice which I read several times over. A couple of things to note here: I had given up trying any anal activities as they tended to be slightly uncomfortable and bought no real excitement. Another is I am more than aware that the anal clutching sensation can be used for arousal and I have tried unsuccessfully to bring myself to orgasm using this but to no real effect other than frustration. And lastly, and perhaps most curiously, it is worth mentioning that my first real orgasm was during a maths exam at school. I mention this as I think I was so tensed up I was basically doing what is written in this forum. I had a mind blowing dry orgasm and I have been chasing that experience all my life - this is basically that experience.

What did I do? Relax, have no expectations and go slow where the first things that were useful. If nothing else a session is a chance to just really relax and how many times in life can we do that. The program I followed: I started out by inserting the device and leaving it there for around 20 minutes whilst I looked at some interesting images, lying on my side (I tried many positions but this seems to be actually very comfortable) and doing some deep slow breathing. As in meditation I didn't concentrate too hard on anything specific but just observed reactions as they happened. I noticed some minor twitches and very small clutches which boded well. Following this I did the recommended 20 to 30 breaths in, lightly clutching my anal muscles and relaxing completely. On relaxing I noticed some slightly higher intensity twitches and spasms which were exciting. I then set my base clutching level which I held for 3 to 4 minutes. Even thinking about it now is erotic. I noticed many light and gentle uncontrollable anal spasms. I then slowly moved on to taking deeper, crying breaths in, clutching to around 50%, holding for 10 seconds and slowly releasing. After doing this for around a dozen times, on releasing I was experiencing a lot of deeper spasms and involuntary clutches, although nothing was majorly deep at this point just very pleasant. As the excitement built I tried to keep in line with this. Returning to the base level is one of the key elements in my opinion. If you relax completely (because you are looking at porn and not concentrating hard enough which happened to me) it's almost like you have to reset the whole experience. Keeping the clutch to a light level is very difficult but erotically very charged. I then went on to a 50% clutch which I tried to maintain as long as possible whilst breathing slowly and deeply (not sure if this is the correct thing to do?). From this point on my body seem to take over which was an absolute and unexpected delight. I went in to a bout of 2 to 3 hours of waves of continued spasms. They seem to start out with a "here we go sensation" and build and build. I came very very close to orgasm especially on one occasion - I would say 99.8% there but became distracted (ironically once at how I must write this up this up on the forum!). As the spasms started to die away and I started to relax (I was having an awful lot of trouble trying to relax and breathe at this point) I was subject to bouts of uncontrollable shaking and trembling from head to foot, sometime lightly but some times more violently. Sometimes the clutching would be gentle but would build and other times it was insistent so that it was impossible not to thrust and writhe about. In all of this I had no erection at all. At the best times I was thrown into an endless cycle of relaxing, spasming once more and going through the whole process over and over. Both times I have done this I tend to stay in this a little too long perhaps because the waves generally become less gradual and inconsistent after about two hours, however as an eternal optimist I am always hoping that I will reach a satisfying conclusion. I am utterly hooked as I thought I might be and I'm not sure how I'm going to cope when my partner returns as she would look very dimly on this.

 

Some general observations.

Next session I am going to use the Anaros and see what that does. The sliding in and out sensation I get at the moment as I involuntarily clutch is beyond ecstasy - just make sure you have enough lubricant. 

I think the real excitement comes from engaging in something that you're not in control of.

I am beside myself at how my body can take over, I don't think I'll ever get over that experience. At nearly 60 I thought I had experienced pretty much everything my body was capable of.

Looking at porn is a dual edged sword. Movies did nothing as they unwind at a completely different pace to how you feel. Still images were deeply arousing but required you to concentrate on something other than what you are feeling - finding the return button on the laptop. 

I was amazed at the trance like state you can get yourself into. Even thinking about it now makes me want to re-enter that warm and exciting world. 

My "high heart rate" alarm on my watch went off during the sessions but I don't think that is necessarily a bad thing. If you don't hear back from me you'll know that I keeled over!

I was entranced by the fact that with only a little nudge from an image I had flashbacks of sex. The sensations of touch, sound and smell came to me in ultra vivid memory recalls which were astonishingly erotic. It was very much like having a wet dream as a teenager. 

Lastly, don't bother with anything vibrating. In my very, very limited experience it really seems like the experience is nothing to do with that, vibrations seem to mask, even destroy the sensitive twitch responses which you are aiming to develop. 

I would be interested to know if my experiences above constitute a prostate or anal orgasm or whether that is yet to come? My thoughts are no it's not an orgasm at the moment, however perhaps that will come. 

Thats about it. If you manage to get through to the end of this post thanks for reading. It needed to be said.

 

 


   
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(@divine_o)
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Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 904
 

Hi and welcome to the forum.  It sounds like you were doing what is good for you, because you are getting results. Also sounds like you have read a lot. This is very early to be asking a lot of detailed questions about technique, in my opinion, especially if things are working so quickly. Spend a few weeks alone with your toys and see what happens. Think of it as your honeymoon period, letting intimacy lead you without the direct influence of others.  In the meantime you can keep a journal if you want to remember your journey, or to take notes on your progress and method if you are scientifically inclined.  But that is just my opinion of course.

Also I do not know what your situation is with your wife, but these toys are nothing to be ashamed of and there are ways of presenting them to a prude partner without freaking them out. I don’t think secrets are the answer here, especially because after a while your partner will find out, and wouldn’t you rather that be now than 10 years from now? If she doesn’t like it then you can keep doing it in private and you won’t have lost anything, and if she does like it you will have immediate support on your journey.  Also one of the common side effects of these toys is a heightened sexuality in general, so if this is something that bleeds into your intimacy with her, eventually she will see it as a positive thing, even if she isn’t for it in the beginning. 


   
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Helghast
(@helghast)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1422
 

You certainly sound on the right track,sounds like a great session though.take it  That’s a bird in the hand. If you feel your body takes over,let it,it will get you over the line eventually.

Posted by: @fidelio

I am utterly hooked as I thought I might be and I'm not sure how I'm going to cope when my partner returns as she would look very dimly on this.

Why would your partner look on your pleasure dimly? She could add a lot to your sessions.

 


   
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rumel
(@rumel)
Illustrious Member Customer
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 4081
 

@fidelio, I too would like to welcome you to our little community.

Posted by: @fidelio

... From this point on my body seem to take over which was an absolute and unexpected delight. I went in to a bout of 2 to 3 hours of waves of continued spasms. They seem to start out with a "here we go sensation" and build and build. I came very very close to orgasm especially on one occasion - I would say 99.8% there but became distracted... I was subject to bouts of uncontrollable shaking and trembling from head to foot, sometime lightly but some times more violently. ...At the best times I was thrown into an endless cycle of relaxing, spasming once more and going through the whole process over and over. ...

These statements are all consistent with descriptions of men experiencing a Super-O (please read @Buster 's thread What exactly is a Super-O? to get a wider perspective of what a Super-O is in reality.)

Posted by: @fidelio

Both times I have done this I tend to stay in this a little too long perhaps because the waves generally become less gradual and inconsistent after about two hours, however as an eternal optimist I am always hoping that I will reach a satisfying conclusion.

If you are referring to having a HFWO as a result of prostate massage you may not ever experience that. There is a hormonal release of prolactin and oxytocin at the time of ejaculation which usually results in the "happy ending" feelings or as you stated "satisfying conclusion." With prostate based dry orgasms this hormonal release may not take place and there may be no refractory period so multiple orgasms over a period of hours, as you experienced, are possible. Most of the membership tries to avoid forming a habit of HFWO's so they can enjoy the benefits of sustained orgasmic pleasure. However, if you want to try for HFWO's here are a couple of threads you may wish to read -> Just can't achieve a "hands free" orgasm, Finally a hands-free orgasm! & Achieving hands-free ejaculation...continued.

Posted by: @fidelio

I am utterly hooked as I thought I might be and I'm not sure how I'm going to cope when my partner returns as she would look very dimly on this.

'Mistress Aneros' has already got you hooked, hasn’t she? You’ll become addicted like so many of us, as she starts to re-write your neural code, the rewiring is upon you and now you're powerless to prevent the sweet seduction of her siren call. Most likely this initial infatuation will abate somewhat but once you have received the pleasure from her why would you want to stop? You can get some further information about this from the Psychological and Managing addiction sections of the Aneros WIKI.

You are certainly not the first man to express the frustration of having a partner not understand your desire for this form of pleasuring. It is sad indeed that many men feel a need to hide their desires out of fear of being judged "kinky", "wierd" or even "perverted" for utilizing nature's gift to men for pleasure. I believe this is due to a western culrure of stifled sexuality from outdated puritanical teachings based in false knowledge, religious dogma and unquestioned taboos of unknown origin. This need not be the case, education is the key element to enjoy these gifts of nature for both men and women. Numerous men have integrated their Aneros use into their partnered relationships. The extent to which each does so is as individual as you are. Aneros use is mostly about pleasure, so whatever way you use it to increase your level of pleasure is your choice.

You and your partner may find reading the Women Too chapter of the Aneros WIKI and the A Wife's Perspective thread useful information and insight into this topic. Here are two threads documenting a pair of married couples integration of Aneros use into their sexual/sensual activities -> Naughty wife loving my journey. & Aneros Devices Changed Our Marriage For the Better. Additionally, you may enjoy reading the Blog entries of members 'artform' and 'STARR831' as they touch upon Aneros usage with their partners. Numerous men have integrated their Aneros use into their partnered relationships. The extent to which each does so is as individual as you are. Aneros use is mostly about pleasure, so whatever way you use it to increase your level of pleasure is your choice.

Posted by: @fidelio

The sliding in and out sensation I get at the moment as I involuntarily clutch is beyond ecstasy... I think the real excitement comes from engaging in something that you're not in control of. I am beside myself at how my body can take over, I don't think I'll ever get over that experience.

"...beyond ecstasy...", "...not in control..." sounds pretty super orgasmic to me.

Posted by: @fidelio

I was amazed at the trance like state you can get yourself into. Even thinking about it now makes me want to re-enter that warm and exciting world. 

I've occasionally referred to Aneros use as erotic meditation for the altered state of consciousness Anerosessions may induce (please see <Aneros and an 'Optimal' mind state?). As @B-Mayfield noted long ago, thinking about one's prior experiences is in and of itself an arousal generating process.

Posted by: @fidelio

I would be interested to know if my experiences above constitute a prostate or anal orgasm or whether that is yet to come? My thoughts are no it's not an orgasm at the moment, however perhaps that will come.

I think you did in fact experience a series of full body Super-O's (please see the definition) but may be are/were thinking/expecting something else. Prostate based orgasms are qualitatively different from penile based orgasms so I hope you don't get hung up on an imaginary concept about what they are. Perhaps reading Super-O Myths & Illusions regarding 'the Edge' and a couple of other myths and @Neros thread The Myth of Super Orgasm may help clarify things.

Good Vibes to You!


   
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