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08/14/2013 1:07 pm
I have been able to have more succesful sessions during the last month, and I got to that by trying a different approach. In fact the other night I started a session at 1 am, started having super o's at 1.30 am, and didn't stop until the Sun came up. It was crazy, exhausting yet so energizing, kind of like a perpetual energy machine.
Practice your ability to disconnect from pleasure by turning your attention to some other thing*. My theory is that when you do that, maybe you are not consciously processing pleasure, but your body is still feeling it, or at least it's still creating an impact somewhere. So if you're rubbing your penis without paying attention to it, you won't feel pleasure or the urge to cum, but it's still being felt somewhere, much like rubbing your skin, eventually it will start burning out of soreness.
With this in mind, once it starts getting a little good, just keep doing what got you there, without trying any harder, despite pleasure levels rising, staying the same, or disappearing. I've found out that our body is just like a fickle b tch and you should treat it like one. Make it beg for pleasure, don't give it right away, no matter how long it takes, as long as you keep the "teasing your body" mindset, eventually things will pick up again. It's like your body will give you a small incentive along the way, just to see how you react, and if you act all needy, your body (much like a girl) will lose interest right away. Make it beg for pleasure. Once enough tension is generated, your body will slowly start taking over until it starts going crazy.
Also I've found very helpful to do every now and then a full strong PC contraction, as hard as you can (as though you were trying to lift yourself up with your PC muslces using the aneros as a handle lol). As long as you are well lubed, you won't damage yourself inside in a wrong way. You will, however, feel discomfort at first, but it's necessary to "map" things down there, it's important to know where the other non-pleasurable-prostate-less wall is. It gives a better sense of what's going on on the other side, a better reference point. It's easier to recognise how much pressure you're applying to your prostate if you feel how much pressure you're applying to the other side also.
Remember, don't go crazy with pleasure right away, make your body want it, make it look for it by itself, make it go crazy. Just keep a very slight control over things, but eventually if you feel like moaning, moan, if you feel like moving a different way, do it, but I insist on that mindset, your body is a girl, and as long as you don't appear needy to it, it will follow along.
Another tip for this is to pay attention to your body's needs and rythms. If you really payed attention, you'd be amazed how you are forcing your body do things that harm it. Sometimes even pleasure can come from pain, but let yourself feel that pain too, let it pass by giving it time, don't force things. I've been able to feel a pleasure-pain cycle, things start getting pleasurable, and then they stop and start getting tiring. THAT's when you tend to force things so that they get pleasurable again, but you're only desensitizing parts of your body essential to feel a full body super-o.
I hope this helps.
*Try for example putting hot water in a bowl and cold water in another bowl. Put both hands in each bowl, and try to feel only the hot one, then only the cold one. This is done by shifting your attention. The more you dominate your attention, the closer to success you'll be. As you get better, try with more subtle things, not extremes like hot and cold.
08/14/2013 3:29 pm
Great post Jmay! This is spot on in my opinion. Times that I have experienced the most pleasure from sessions were when I was able to expand my focus wider then back down to the pin point of the aneros. Expanding and contracting my focus with relaxation breathing really helps Experience the waves and not try and force things. I also loved your b*itch analogy. Great observations, thanks for sharing!
08/15/2013 11:42 am
Very counter-intuitive, jmay, but you steered me right so far so I'll give it a try. When you say to put your attention on something else, do you mean when you're already aroused, to think of something that turns you off or just something neutral? I assume you have to be somewhat aroused to turn your attention away from the source of the arousal. So this works at the start of a session to trick your body into seeking out it's own path to more arousal. This gives more control to your subconscious mind and body than forcing it to follow your ego's concept of where pleasure is. Brilliant. I'll give it a try when I get out of my current dry spell. I found my sweet spot and was giving it all my attention for a while. Then things got quiet. I was afraid of burning myself out. Maybe your approach will guide my inner mind back to that sweet spot if not to my first dry orgasm. Thanks.
Topic starter
08/15/2013 5:07 pm
Always keep the aoursed context in mind, what you are doing is sexual, so everything has to be in tune according to that. The thing is that the glans stimulates ejaculation, but also pleasurable feelings. If you fix your attention there you'll ejaculate pretty fast, but if you shift your attention, still being aroused, somewhere else in your body or in a mental fantasy that pops up into your mind, you can pass the urge to ejaculate (which with practice will get to be no more than a second long, and something very subtle, while some times it simply isn't present).
The thing is that you should be able to separate COMPLETELY ejaculation feelings from orgasmic feelings, so you get rid of the incentives to ejaculate. That way, when you have to hold back from ejaculation you don't feel you just held back from something that could've been very good.
For example, the other night I was too anxious because of other things going on in my life, so I decided to have a "quick" masturbation session, just enough to put me to sleep. I ejaculated three times with virtually no orgasmic feelings (That's when I realised that I've been able to separate both sensations so well). I could have kept going without tiring myself up too, it's amazing how vast sexuality can be when you know how to work with it. What used to be the only way to do it, now simply doesn't cut it for me. Maybe it was never pleasurable, but only tiring in a different way. Anyway, you can force ejaculation pretty fast, but the orgasm has its own rythm, and it has a lot to do with your body's state in general, it's something progressive. Just make the other things where you shift your attention to more real, make them much more real, feel them more, so that you can actually stay there without the temptation to ejaculate. You'll get better and better the more you practice these natural abilities.
08/16/2013 1:47 pm
I think I misunderstood you. This is not a new technique but a continuation of your previous "The key to sexual stimulation freedom"? If so, do you mean that when completely aroused but not having orgasms, you recommend edging toward ejaculation and taking your attention completely away from ejaculation at the last moment? Then the good sensations will build up in the background without trying, maybe to orgasm? Back to my original question, you're not putting attention on something that will turn you off, but something neutral and other than the ejaculation and pleasure? Like the weather? You quit trying to maintain arousal and wait for something to happen?
Addendum - nevermind, jmay, I think you answered my questions in the first involuntaries thread.
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