Should I avoid all masturbation/hand stimulation?

Hi struggler,

Welcome to the Forum.

The frustration you are experiencing is a very common phenomenon with new Aneros users. There is nothing wrong per se with using your Aneros as a masturbatory aid, that is your choice. However, if your desired path is to elevate your sessions into the Super-O realm, I recommend breaking the link between Aneros use and traditional ejaculation & orgasm. A traditional ejaculation is almost always available to you without the Aneros, but the Super-O requires a different paradigm of thinking and technique to get to the non-ejaculatory orgasm. This new paradigm requires you to drop expectations of results, it is the expectations that lead to your frustrations. This new paradigm is also facilitated by learning to calm and relax your mind and body so you can tune into the subtle sensations generated through Aneros use. The ability to totally relax will solve the dilemma of “…trying too hard to not try,…”, when you are sufficiently relaxed with a quieted mind, you will know the state of “not trying” is the same as “just letting go” and living in the moment.

My two suggestions:

1) Get the HypnAerosession cd or Mp3.
2) Try the "do nothing" approach (no contractions).

$25 is a bit much for some mp3s, but maybe when I'm desperate.

Sometimes when I try the "do nothing" approach I do too little and fall asleep 😀

Try concentrating on breathing deeply enough that you can feel your abdomen rise. That action will automatically move the Aneros enough to stimulate your prostate just a little. If you are concentrating on your breathing you will become aware of subtle sensations and that is what Aneros is about.

To be 're-wired' you have to learn that orgasm and ejaculation are 2 entirely different processes. We tend to believe they are one and the same since our past experience usually has been when we masturbate or have sex we ejaculate at the same time as we have an orgasm. I had to learn to separate the 2 and learn to appreciate the orgasm by itself.

Masturbation is probably counter-productive in this situation since it perpetuates the myth of orgasm/ejaculation being the same.

One thing I often do in an Aneros session is to cup my hand very, very lightly around my scrotum (sack). Just enough that I can feel the movement of my testes inside the scrotum. That produces a very pleasurable sensation. I am careful to avoid touching my penis during this time.

Ejaculation/orgasm combination compared to orgasm alone is like comparing a jackhammer to a feather. The orgasm sensation starts out as a feeling like someone is tickling my prostate with a feather and the feeling builds from there.

Try a morning session on a weekend or day off. If I try at bedtime when I am already tired and I too often fall asleep before I orgasm. The bonus there for me is I wake up 2 or 3 hours later with the Aneros still in and my body is intensely aware of it at that point. The downside to that is it interrupts your night's sleep so I don't recommend that it becomes a habit.

I am relatively new to quieting the mind, but understand it best as "silencing the left brain." To do this, I stop the voice in my head before it completes a thought. It will keep instigating thoughts, and that is okay; however, I find that as long as I don't finish the sentence in my brain, it doesn't register.

Can any of you more experienced members tell me if I am heading in the right direction?