Anxiety troubles

I've had anxiety for most of my life.  My opinion is that you got caught in an anxiety loop (fear causing more fear causing more fear) as the result of heightened emotions.  The weird thing with anxiety is that little things can set it off.  Even good things, because it takes us out of our routine.  So the combination of your excitement plus change led to an anxiety episode, and you got stuck in this loop.  I think you should simply allow your anxiety symptoms to exist, and don't give them your entire focus.  Don't try to avoid them, or fight them.  Simply let them be there, and they will pass.  There is a really good book that is such a huge help for anxiety.  It's called Hope and Help for your nerves by Claire Weekes.  You can find it on amazon.  Things will be ok.  You will get past this. 

Posted by: @scarystories

I've felt closer to my own body and it's been amazing. But I've realized I have an anxiety disorder.

I get this, I also learned things about myself during my Super-O adventures that were not too much to my liking, and I deal with anxiety a lot. It's just kind of an inconvenient truth that Super-O seeking (and finding) can trigger some unexpected results for some people, it's just the way it is. Sometimes Super-O help a lot with my anxiety and well-being, sometimes, not so much. There are moments where I find I'm probably self-medicating with sessions, or using them as a replacement for other things that I lack. I don't think there is anything wrong with this, but Super-O have a much more direct effect on brain chemistry than playing videogames or watching sports...

Posted by: @scarystories

I really need help. I don't know if I should continue. So far I have completely stopped since the super o a few weeks ago. It doesn't seem to matter. I don't know if this is just my new normal or what. 

What kind of help are you looking for ? I'm really not trying to be rude, do you think there should be a health professional involved, or is this more like a philosophical thing to you, where understanding what is happening could bring back balance ? I think what @jja3 said is the best answer, this will pass, but it could take some time if you're not actively working on it.  Stopping sessions for now is the right move to make, but you may have to replace them with another, calmer activity. I don't feel you have to fear that you will forever be stuck in this "new normal" but you do have to occupy your thoughts in some way. 

Posted by: @scarystories

I really need help. I don't know if I should continue. So far I have completely stopped since the super o a few weeks ago. It doesn't seem to matter. I don't know if this is just my new normal or what. 

Aneros, back door play, prostate stimulation and anything newly discovered that is so far out of the ordinary or routine can and often do cause a reaction from the brain.  It's not unlike going through a trauma or a major shock.

Everyone's brain, being as different as we all are, cope in different manners and for some, there may be  lasting effects (as probably in your case).  To some, the change could represent a major paradigm shift and be totally welcomed in one's life (me) that the lasting effects are more joyful than experiencing a sense of anxiety.  

As we often hear, time is a healer; hang in there and try to find joy in your journey.

Just my two cents worth.

I have serious anxiety problems but prostate massage is one of the things that calms me best. I stop caring about most things. Even hours after the sessions, my thoughts are no longer racing. My sessions last between 60 and 90 minutes.

Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply. I'll admit I wrote this in the midst of one of the worst anxiety attacks I possibly have ever had. I'm feeling a little better now. I am very interested in hearing from people who also have anxiety issues. My family has a decently long history of anxiety disorders. But I've most made it through my life without any issues. I dont really know if this anxiety has been triggered from my experiences on this superO journey or if it was a coincidence. My anxiety seems to gravitate only towards health issues.

I am fairly young and healthy so I'm not really sure why that is. But I do think that is a big reason why the aneros as triggered this for me. Taking time to really listen to your body when you havent before can really scare you. And that anxiety can actually cause real symptoms which can send you in a spiral.

Posted by: @zentai

What kind of help are you looking for ? I'm really not trying to be rude, do you think there should be a health professional involved, or is this more like a philosophical thing to you, where understanding what is happening could bring back balance ? I think what @jja3 said is the best answer, this will pass, but it could take some time if you're not actively working on it.  Stopping sessions for now is the right move to make, but you may have to replace them with another, calmer activity. I don't feel you have to fear that you will forever be stuck in this "new normal" but you do have to occupy your thoughts in some way. 

I think i was looking for more people with similar symptoms, If they went away with time. If they had to stop doing sessions or what. Upon reading some of these replies Its made me realize Its not really anxiety in general. Its may be specific to hypochondriac anxiety. I've always been a touch of a hypocondriac. But it never really bothered me much. here and there If i felt a random chest pain i might panic for a few hours but I could deal. It was definitely not a day to day thing. More like a yearly thing.
 
I honestly don't even know how to stop the sessions at this point. They are all A-less with zero physical. When i lay down to relax the good feelings start without my permission. The only way to occupy my mind with something else. I cant let my mind wonder or it starts on its own. 

If nobody else can relate to what I'm saying here, Thats completely fine too. Maybe this can help someone else in the future just reading about experiences. I think, knowing what i know now, That i probably wouldnt havent began this journey. Don't get me wrong, the experiences are amazing. but every amazing experience comes with an equally unamazing anxiety attack. And thats not worth it to me. But maybe this will pass and I'll be able to get a better handle on it. Hopefully so.

Posted by: @scarystories

When i lay down to relax the good feelings start without my permission.

Is it an issue of not being in control that could be the cause?

@ggringo I dont think so. I generally enjoy the sessions that I do have. whether or not I meant to initial them. I only brought up the fact they start on their own to say that I cant really seem to stop them even if i wanted to. Not easily anyways.

The main issue I believe is that to achieve a super o you have to be very intune with your body. I think the rewiring process really helps you notice things in your body that probably have always happened but went unnoticed. I dont think that one day my prostate just started giving me good feelings. I think it was always there just never really noticed it. And thats part of the problem. For someone who is somewhat health conscious, Realizing things are going on in your body that you never noticed before can be terrifying. You might get a random weird feeling in your chest that you would have normally not even noticed, But now you DO notice it. And you have no way of knowing if that is normal or not because you never noticed it before.

When i realized it was this process causing my anxiety, My main question was, If I stop doing the sessions will i ever go back to ignorant bliss. I don't really think I will though. Maybe someone else can correct me on it. But it feels like something that once you experience it, The door is always open and you cant close it. You can ignore it but never fully close it off again.

I can say that I am copping with it a little better lately. I've realized the main thing I can do is to ground myself and shut off the intrusive thoughts quickly. Thats worked pretty well on its own. Partially I think I'm just fed up with it in general. The anxiety, constant fear of death that never seems to go away. I woke up the other day and just say F it.

Posted by @ScaryStories
Realizing things are going on in your body that you never noticed before can be terrifying.

Yes but they can also be exciting, it all depends on how you frame it in your mind. The truth is you have very little control over the operating mechanisms of your body. Your breathing, your heart beating, your digesting of food all aspects absolutely necessary to sustain your physical existence are not under your control, they all happen independently of your conscious or subconscious thoughts, so there is no point in being anxious about these mechanisms happening just because you are aware of them. This is part of the lesson of learning to surrender to the pleasure your body can generate.

Posted by @ScaryStories
If I stop doing the sessions will i ever go back to ignorant bliss. I don't really think I will though.

NO, you've let the genie out of the bottle, you can't un-ring that bell. Once you've awakened your prostate it will never go back to sleep, though, if you ignore it, over time it will gradually get the message that you aren't interested in its stirrings and it will quiet down.

Posted by @ScaryStories
I think I'm just fed up with it in general. The anxiety, constant fear of death that never seems to go away.

This is indicative of something far deeper than an awakened prostate and some professional counseling would probably be a good idea.

Good Vibes to You!

I think Rumel is right,  , if you read only your comments on this page, it sounds like you may well need some real help. No shame in that. Maybe your like I used to be, I couldn't accept good things happening to me, when what should bring me joy I found a way  to make it a negative. Your literally experiencing what so many of us are working toward and all you can do is stress about it. I really mean no offense by writing this. I really hope find a way to enjoy it, and I'm hoping a verbal slap might snap you out of this funk your mind has created. I literally had to tell myself to fuck off, on several occasions in life, so as I didn't mis the joy in my accomplishments. Sorry man just thinking out loud. Good luck.

PS. Maybe you should take a day and goon out till ya can't do any more, may just get it out of your system. It can't go on forever. You know if you can't beat em join em 

@scarystories 

I think Rumel is right here. It's like riding a bike, you may never forget how to do it, but you might not be interested in riding a bike anymore for a long period of time. I went trough different issues, where achieving Super-Os was so consistent for me that I would just do it as often as possible. This was not sustainable...

Now I'm back to traditional masturbation most of the times, and I don't get the urge to have sessions as often as before. I think your body will adjust to the rewired state if you give it some time. This could be weeks, months, who knows ? 

But maybe you triggered something (your anxiety) that would have laid dormant otherwise, so while I don't think there is a "treatment" for an awakened body/prostate, there are clearly options for general anxiety that could help you. Whatever you decide to do, good luck and take care.  

Posted by: @scarystories

My main question was, If I stop doing the sessions will i ever go back to ignorant bliss.

It was not a matter of I had to stop, or that I preferred to stop.  Last year, out of nowhere I found myself taking around a 2 month break from Aneros and Aless.  I seemed to want to pay attention elsewhere, or wanted distraction elsewhere in my life.  My coping during Covid times is partly helped through engaging in distractions, and renewed focus on beneficial life areas (exercise, career).  And so I found myself having stopped, without a backwards glance nor yearning.  Then equally out of nowhere, I thought to try it again, and I have been aboard ever since.  I was none the worse for wear, either during, or after my break.  The break may have benefitted my sessions since I considered my habits of contracting muscles and how firmly.  There seemed to be a simplification in the number of muscles I'd earlier found, too- a consolidation of sorts.  Gladly, for me, Aneros/Aless is both a distraction and a beneficial life area ; )

I agree with the entries of others above mine. I empathize with how you feel and I sincerely wish you well.  

Posted by: @scarystories

When i realized it was this process causing my anxiety, My main question was, If I stop doing the sessions will i ever go back to ignorant bliss. I don't really think I will though. Maybe someone else can correct me on it. But it feels like something that once you experience it, The door is always open and you cant close it. You can ignore it but never fully close it off again.

I discovered a type of a-less years before I found the aneros... early on in that process, I found it hard to switch off, and those feelings would sometimes rise out of nowhere at random times. I wouldn't be able to sleep for hours after a session, because my body would be way too energized. I'd feel a buzzing in my spine sometimes. It freaked me out, but after a while I gained control over it. It's like there was some switch inside myself that I can't describe, some way I had to ground myself out of it.

I also stopped doing a-less sessions, because I feel like my body doesn't understand when it's the appropriate time or not, since there are no other physical cues. I always pair these kinds of sessions with some other form of stimulation, so there's no confusion about when it's time to have these feelings or not. I also made sure to end these sessions with an ejaculation, just to close things off in no uncertain terms.

I feel pretty able to close the door now. Of course I don't forget the sensations, they're still accessible, and visit me during arousal, but never at random times when sex is the last thing on my mind (which is what used to happen).

I'm also highly anxious generally, so I know how much that can suck. The best advice I read was to acknowledge the anxiety, and be aware that anxiety itself can make my body react physically.