A step forward, then backward

Progress isn't linear in this journey.

A few days ago I was still having the wonderful feelings a lot of the time, and could get them by thinking about them. Now they aren't nearly as frequent and don't come as easily. I am aware I should let go of my ego as well as my expectations, but sometimes that can be hard even if you are aware. When things go away as quickly as they came it can be easy to start second guessing minute elements of your aneros sessions to try and troubleshoot. Is that trying too hard?

I reckon I should go back to meditating for a few minutes before lying down in a session. Perhaps I need to also focus on my breath? Breathing deeply in a way that directed pressure towards my pelvis seemed rather important when things were more lively. Perhaps the biggest thing is keeping in mind that even if a session is more or less a dud, there will be a more exciting one in the future. Sometimes I'll get more sensations after the session than during.

I think the biggest thing to keep in mind might be to keep having aneros sessions in order to keep regularly stimulating the prostate to help wake up the nerves and increase circulation in the area. This, along with staying mindful of sensations, is probably what causes things to eventually "wake up".

Oh well, I'll just have to be patient.

Been experiencing one new thing lately, a quivering spasm of the pelvic floor muscles seemingly near the prostate. I've had this sort of thing happen in the past, don't know if it's a sign things are moving along in a good way or if it's just a neutral occurrence. I usually don't feel any pleasurable sensations during these spasms, so I feel neutral about them.