What can I do to ma...
 
Notifications
Clear all

What can I do to make this work for me?


Avatar for Author
(@lonewolf8)
Honorable Member Customer
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 570
Topic starter  

Been off Aneros for a few weeks. Thinking of trying again tonight.

Never had success after many years, no orgasms, no waves, only a few involuntary twitches maybe a few years ago. Cannot even find my prostate. Do I even have one?

What can I do to make all this work?


   
Quote
Avatar for Author
 Nat
(@nat)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 222
 

I think answering the question requires a lot more information.

Tell members a bit more of your background with the device, prostate play, etc.  Sometimes it is just a mental thing.  Sometimes it is the uncomfortableness of not having experience in these areas. 

Taking time off can help.  It works with easing any frustrations you had previously. 


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
(@rockwellcollinshf2050)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 5 years ago
Posts: 94
 

Well, the best way to make prostate stimulation not work is to push yourself too hard.

My experience, whether with aneros or no device at all, is you need to relax fully and not be driven.  Indeed, a mindset where you try to avoid the things associated with masturbation or sex [erections, orgasm, ejaculation].

If I am masturbating and want to speed up to get it over with, I clench - tighten certain muscles.  Exactly the wrong thing for prostate pleasure.  Instead, you need to relax and if you are going to do anything, push out rather than draw in.

For me, I first played with my anal area in the mid 70s, learned I had a prostate in 1989 after buying the ESO book, played around with mental prostate stimulation - Bauer ESO book until 2002 when I bought my first device through High Island Health - the "medical" parent-ish of Aneros.

Don't know if the latest edition is as good as the edition I read circa 1989 or so, but I highly recommend the Bauer ESO book.


   
ReplyQuote
Dismantled
(@dismantled)
Eminent Member Customer
Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 23
 

@lonewolf8, you’ve probably read the wiki and lots of advice on the community general discussion, and on top of that, it seems everyone’s experience is slightly different, so there’s very little anyone can tell you.

If you were born with in tact male genitals, you have a prostate. I’m relatively young and can rarely say I can definitely feel my prostate. But it’s definitely there.

One thing I would say based on my memory of trying ahead of my first prostate orgasm is you need to be very aware of your body. Like the fact that your prostate might not be obvious when feeling for it, the impulses which will lead to an orgasm might not be obvious. The tingles or buzzes that grow into orgasms need to be nurtured and amplified through focus. But you need to find them first. They might not start in your anus or the base of your penis, they might be in your foot or your face, or even in a disembodied space in front of you. After you’ve inserted, relaxed and done some breathing exercises, leg or pelvic motions etc. if you can focus your mind on a small area of your body, you can move your focus around and search for something that feels a tiny bit good. Not amazing, not necessarily even tingly, just a bit good. Keep your focus there and see if you can will it to grow. You might not even have an orgasmic feeling when you start to feel your body tense up or shake, but when it comes it gets easier to find. It still doesn’t necessarily come together every time.


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
(@lonewolf8)
Honorable Member Customer
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 570
Topic starter  

Not been here for ages I tend to avoid the forums these days (hard to use this version of the forum, no time, unmotivation etc).

 

Posted by: @nat

Tell members a bit more of your background with the device, prostate play, etc.  Sometimes it is just a mental thing.  Sometimes it is the uncomfortableness of not having experience in these areas. 

Taking time off can help.  It works with easing any frustrations you had previously. 

 

I've used Helix Syn, Eupho Syn, Helix Trident, Eupho Trident, Progasm Ice, Peridise, Tempo, Maximus Trident, MGX Trident, nJoy Pure Wand, nJoy Pure pfun Plug.

Been doing this since 2014.

Never managed to find my prostate with my finger or a toy. Nothing I've used made me say "ah, I found you red handed, Mr Prostate!"

I've abstained from prostate toys, from masturbation. Nothing seems to help.

 

 

Posted by: @rockwellcollinshf2050

My experience, whether with aneros or no device at all, is you need to relax fully and not be driven.  Indeed, a mindset where you try to avoid the things associated with masturbation or sex [erections, orgasm, ejaculation].

 

During sessions, I try very hard to not have expectations, to not get too excited if I feel anything or too down on myself if I don't. I know what you are saying though. I only feel bad about this stuff in the times that I am not doing sessions. During sessions, I stay as neutral as I can, if I feel myself tensing muscles, I consciously work towards relaxing them.

Posted by: @rockwellcollinshf2050

Instead, you need to relax and if you are going to do anything, push out rather than draw in.

Yes, I try to relax, although I dont usually push out forcefully.

 

 

Posted by: @dismantled

Like the fact that your prostate might not be obvious when feeling for it, the impulses which will lead to an orgasm might not be obvious.

I've not been able to insert a finger in to feel. All the toys I've used never seem to induce a feeling in me that makes me realise I've felt the prostate.

 

Posted by: @dismantled

After you’ve inserted, relaxed and done some breathing exercises, leg or pelvic motions etc. if you can focus your mind on a small area of your body, you can move your focus around and search for something that feels a tiny bit good. Not amazing, not necessarily even tingly, just a bit good. Keep your focus there and see if you can will it to grow. You might not even have an orgasmic feeling when you start to feel your body tense up or shake, but when it comes it gets easier to find. It still doesn’t necessarily come together every time.

This is interesting, I've encountered this theory before, like a searchlight looking all over your body thing. I will try to remember to do this next time I feel up to doing prostate play.


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
(@clenchy)
Prominent Member Customer
Joined: 6 years ago
Posts: 679
 

Posted by: @lonewolf8
This is interesting, I've encountered this theory before, like a searchlight looking all over your body thing. I will try to remember to do this next time I feel up to doing prostate play.

It's a good approach, I think of it more as a mind's "ear" I'm using to listen to different locations. I think it can help sometimes to have a session when you don't even care about having one. The common wisdom is to have your sessions aroused, but nobody can tell you how that arousal affects your mentality. Maybe it makes you needy, less patient, or less open to certain sensations. (Which is the case for me a lot of the time).

One of my very best sessions was like that... I didn't have any goal I wanted from the session, I was indifferent enough to just observe without want. It lead me to focus on something I wouldn't normally consider, which was a very slight tingling under the p-tab. And because I wasn't aroused and feeling like I needed an orgasm, I just went along with it and decided it was a nice enough sensation to just lie there and chill with. Putting myself into it for its own sake. It got nicer, and I allowed myself to just zone out and be present with it (not flexing or pushing, just chilling and watching). And then that turned into a cycle of zoning out more, and feeling it more intensely, until somehow (over the course of a few seconds) it demanded my complete surrender before turning into two really strong, yet completely limp-dicked, back-to-back dry orgasms.

I guess my point is, it isn't always obvious where an orgasm will come from, or how it will approach. So it's worth throwing the sensory filters wide-open sometimes and going along with what ever comes up... even if it doesn't register as any kind of sensation that might lead to an orgasm. I didn't think the tiny perineum-tingling would go anywhere, and if I had been really horny and wanting an orgasm, I might have skipped over it. It makes sense that if you've never had an orgasm from the aneros, then you might not know what to expect if one does come knocking. I'm absolutely terrible for trying to steer a session towards what I want to feel, rather than working with what I'm already feeling.

 


   
Faith-Manages, Helghast, Ggringo and 1 people reacted
ReplyQuote
Helghast
(@helghast)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1422
 

First things first. Stop trying to find the prostate. You have passed over it. But your arousal isn’t there,and it’s not in sync with the gland,so there’s nothing to feel. The two work together to generate pleasure. You’re expecting a surge akin to getting a baseball bat smashed across your face,but that’s not how it works. It’s one of the many aspects of the mental block you clearly have.

The toys are at the right spot. So are the A-less muscles. I think you aren’t getting aroused enough because of the over thinking. I wrote you a 30 day A-Less routine months back,I never heard anything back about it,did you do it? Get anything from it? 


   
Ggringo reacted
ReplyQuote
brailleskin
(@brailleskin)
Trusted Member Customer
Joined: 1 year ago
Posts: 62
 

@Helghast

Can someone link that 30-day A-less routine? I can't find it through search, and I'd love to try it


   
ReplyQuote
Helghast
(@helghast)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1422
 

@brailleskin I think the post was called Lonewolf8 Homework. Search that and you’ll find it.


   
ReplyQuote
Ggringo
(@ggringo)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 8 years ago
Posts: 965
 

Posted by: @helghast

It’s one of the many aspects of the mental block you clearly have.

I'm sure you'll  agree that this is as much a mental game as it is a physical one but we all need both to accomplish any desired positive results.  You can have all the toys in the world, a welcoming prostate and all the strong floor muscles you can muster but when your head is not in the game, you're doomed and heading for failure.

 

If this was me, after years of absolutely no success without being able to figure out the causes, I would probably give up.  Life is way too short to be frustrated for so long. 

Just my opinion...


   
ReplyQuote
brailleskin
(@brailleskin)
Trusted Member Customer
Joined: 1 year ago
Posts: 62
 

Thankyou @Helghast, amazing post!

Spoiler
Lonewolf8 Homework

Posted by: @helghast

Hey @lonewolf8 🙂 I’ve got some work for your ass :).

I want to share some A-Less training from my journey where i worked some pieces of the puzzle out. There’s no super-o guarantee,but even if we can knock you up some p-waves,it’ll be more than you’ve ever had so it’s worth it,and hopefully you’ll find the faith and motivation that are lacking to start climbing the ladder. This may not make sense to others,but it does to me,others might think of these things differently,good for them 🙂

1) The muscles.

Pc: Find the spot at the base of your dick where your ballsack starts. Press in and flex,pull in,pull down,whichever visualisation you need is fine,feel it? This is where you’ll zero in at gametime.

Sphincter: Flex it,though rather than just trying to flex the hole,think of pulling your cheeks together and having the contraction travel up your ass crack.

Anchored tension: Lift your pelvic floor a little,just a little,don’t be wrenching your guts out,think sucking it up into the body. This is where a chunk of focus goes,this has got to be switched on pretty much permanently while generating an orgasm,imo,no AT,and you’ve a mountain to climb unless your some type of zen master.

Body position and angle.

If you have a sofa,chairs and the like. Sit on one diagonally so you can put one calf on the arm,the other one on the end of the seat cushion,maybe even dangling over. Your elbows can be up to help support the body or tucked like someone lying down in a park but propped up on their elbows. If you’ve seen ppl on holiday in a pool in those inflatable rubber rings,their ass is lowest and in the water,legs and arms are out of the water. This is the kind of angle and position you want to be in. Legs and torso pivoting off the pelvis at about 30 degrees.

 

Visualisation: Putting these together is like placing a skateboard with no wheels on a ball,standing on it and trying to balance. Delicate movements and contractions is all that’s required to stay upright while maintaining pressure on the ball.

 

Session: erotic fantasy,watching porn etc Have you’re session doing whatever it is you do for arousal. Add the Tension,and focus holding it particularly at the pc spot I mentioned. Then get a little tension on the sphincter ,always trying to maintain your tension at both points,which is difficult at the start and requires training to do this controlling each zone separately. Add in small light contractions on top of the tension,the contractions feeling like your pulling both points together,or a rocking sensation in your PF. Pleasure will come in the spaces where they move independently of each other with tension keeping pressure on the muscles and prostate. The tension is how involuntaries are made,despite what ppl think,muscles don’t need to be exhausted to involuntarily contract. The tension will do this.

 

I don’t know how often and for how long you session. You could practice this every day for up to 30 mins one or even twice per day some days for 4 weeks. Sometimes a second session was even better than the first for me. Maybe you’ll feel nothing in the beginning,but keep doing it,small adjustments to the tension and contraction pressures at game time. No brute force necessary. Play with them,push,pull,lift and lower,small adjustments. Find a groove and stick with it,if good things happen,don’t change things,just do what you’ve been doing,no power or tempo increase is necessary,only rhythm,if things change without your command,let them,you just focus on rhythm. Thrust slightly if it helps get the movements in tune.You can also Reach under and pull an ass cheek to the side using the seat cushion to hold your cheeks open a bit,this helps with anal contractions.Try it for a month and report back any progress you make.Remember to try to get lost in your arousal and not look forwards to orgasm,live in the now. Good luck my friend.


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
(@soul-pleasure)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 156
 

@lonewolf8

Sorry for the words but you seem to sabotage yourself (self-sabotage). A mental mechanism.

 

I sent you a message but no response, many people posting help here in the forums but also no response from you.

 

Establish and draw a definitive conclusion if you think it's what you want.

Ask yourself the following question: Do I want to continue using aneros for pleasure? Am I applying myself in a disciplined way? Maybe you decide to stop? Staying in the middle ground is harmful, sometimes you do it sometimes you don't. It is not possible to know if it will work because there is not enough frequency but it is also not possible to know if it will not work because there is not enough frequency either.

Make up your mind!

 

Investigate what is bothering you.

Questions: 1 - Currently you seem to be without aneros sessions. Are you willing to dedicate yourself and do sessions regularly (healthy)?

2 -  How were your sessions before?

3 - Did you meet all the requirements of a session? (Lubrication, quiet place, minimal sexual abstinence).

4 - Do you have anxiety or something similar? (You look disheartened).

5 - Have you ever had exams to detect any health problem (check up)?

 

I advise you to continue but only if you are going to apply it with healthy regularity. Create a follow-up post, test new approaches, and be open-minded.

 

We await your response.


   
Helghast, rumel and Ggringo reacted
ReplyQuote
Helghast
(@helghast)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1422
 

Posted by: @soul-pleasure

Sorry for the words but you seem to sabotage yourself (self-sabotage). A mental mechanism.

I agree with this. I didn’t hear anything back either. I’d like nothing better than for wolf to start making progress,but wee need more info on whether or not he’s applying the right dedication to the journey.

 


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
(@soul-pleasure)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 156
 

@helghast 

 

Sometimes I think he already has the treasure map in his hands but keeps taking other paths (unconsciously) to not get there (Perhaps a certain "fear" that it really works and the purpose is fulfilled?) Maybe. Reflect, reflect @lonewolf8


   
Helghast reacted
ReplyQuote
Helghast
(@helghast)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1422
 

@soul-pleasure I dunno,he goes on Reddit a lot,god only knows what’s being picked up from there,the place is chaos.


   
Soul Pleasure and Zentai reacted
ReplyQuote
Zentai
(@zentai)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1486
 

@helghast 

I agree that Reddit is a bit wild...

With that said, you know as well as I do that things are deceivingly simple once you know what to do, but pretty opaque before that point. Plus you "cheated" a bit by having the wife on board to provide arousal, and you "cheated" some more by being super confident and well above average in physical health. You were well set for success even before you started.  Edit : Of course I'm yanking your chain a bit, you earned it ! Just like me starting when I was very young and horny probably did not hurt at all. Some of us are just on the fast lane for some reason. 

I'm pretty sure right now that we only need Arousal + Relaxation + Focus AND baseline mental and physical health to support these three. That's it. Then the rest is training the flexes and building sensitivity etc. I knew so little when I started compared to now, and yet, it was easier. 

Knowing all that I do now, I also know that my issue is that I can't generate arousal. I just... don't care enough ? But this is not about me, it's about the fact that knowing about things is a small part of the formula here, if someone does not meet the basic elements, then he's in a spot where the potential for a Super-O does not exist. This is a lot more harmful than having unrealistic expectations or being confused about muscle groups.


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
(@soul-pleasure)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 156
 

@zentai @helghast

 

I once visited the Aneros page on Reddit. Does he access information there? Perhaps there is a different point of view there but here there are centralized topics and a great history of experiences.

Big question for you @zentai , are you satisfied with your journey (0 to 100)? Discuss your arousal problem if you feel free to say so...  Maybe going off topic 😆


   
ReplyQuote
Zentai
(@zentai)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1486
 

@soul-pleasure 

There's good info to be had on Reddit, but I prefer the Forum format for having longer discussions. Maybe I'm just getting old, hehe, it's harder for me to keep track of topics and participants on Reddit. I do check r/Aneros and some other sources weekly, but I don't have time to participate everywhere.

My current hurdles are pretty specific, I don't feel this is the best thread to discuss them. I'd say I'm pretty satisfied even without S-Os, sometimes I wonder if I've reached the end of that particular journey ? I'll think about it, maybe I'll start a new thread. 


   
ReplyQuote
Helghast
(@helghast)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1422
 

@zentai 

I’m not necessarily talking about aneros Reddit. Unless I’m mixing him up,I think he reads all kinds of stuff in there so I figured that helped get him to where he doesn’t know what direction to go.

Cheat 😂 There was no cheating,I put my work in like the next guy,alas there is all the thc crew 😂😂😂


   
Zentai reacted
ReplyQuote
Zentai
(@zentai)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1486
 

@helghast 

Yeah, there's a bunch of anal-related subreddits, depending on which you frequent, there's some pretty crazy stuff, compared to just using a standard prostate massager. It's easy to get lost with all the different techniques and equipment. 

Hehe, of course you put the work in ! But it's fair to say that there is some luck involved in putting the efforts on the right things right from the start, and that there are some circumstances that offer a huge boost, like privacy, active lifestyle, having a partner on board, etc. And again, you worked for those things, too.


   
ReplyQuote
Fred27
(@fred27)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 242
 

@zentai from my experience one never reaches the “end of the journey” unless you are content with where you are currently! As I like variety and experimenting my journey will continue until my life is over! So much pleasure to be had!


   
ReplyQuote
Zentai
(@zentai)
Famed Member Customer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 1486
 

@fred27 

Agreed ! Right now it feels like I've seen pretty much everything I had to see on the path I'm on, and I guess some of this stuff is made to be experienced only once or twice. I think I'd have to find a partner to progress much further, for me that might be much harder than achieving S-Os in the first place... 


   
ReplyQuote
Fred27
(@fred27)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 3 years ago
Posts: 242
 

A partner isn’t necessary but a mentor might help. Almost everything can be achieved solo but don’t rush it! Learning to relax and let the pleasure be your guide!


   
ReplyQuote
Avatar for Author
 JJA3
(@jja3)
Member Adventurer
Joined: 4 years ago
Posts: 68
 

Posted by: @lonewolf8

Been off Aneros for a few weeks. Thinking of trying again tonight.

Never had success after many years, no orgasms, no waves, only a few involuntary twitches maybe a few years ago. Cannot even find my prostate. Do I even have one?

What can I do to make all this work?

 

Ok I've read some of your responses.  I'm of the opinion that a person has to find what works specifically for them.  You're doing the routine's that other people have suggested, apparently without success.  Maybe you need to try things backwards.  If your muscles tense up?  Let them.  Normally people avoid penis stimulation while using the aneros.  Maybe you should give it a try.  Build up the arousal until you're near a traditional orgasm and then just sit there and focus on the aneros.  You've been doing this a long time.  Maybe you need to try the things that go against the grain. 

 


   
ReplyQuote
Share:
Skip to toolbar