Some positive progress- My best session so far...

For all those who are moving slowly along this journey, take heart:
I am certainly one of them. I was using Aneros Helix and MGX for a year. I think I must have had around 40-50 sessions, with pretty mixed, negligible results. At least, not enough to really encourage me to invest the time lying in bed with a hard piece of plastic up my backdoor. Finally, I just got bored with it and stopped for a year.
Having some free time alone on my hands (which is rare these days), I decided to take another look at using these things and read some more of the forum posts here and try to start afresh. I also read the Aneros Milestones list, and was encouraged to read that many of the physical reactions I have experienced are all part of the process. So far for me:

• Observation of slight good feelings
• Identifiable contact with prostate
• Doing a set of contractions comfortably
• Holding light sphincter contractions
• Integrating deep breathing
• Definite feeling of contact on prostate
• Arousal amplification by vocalization
• Observation of slight involuntary contractions
• General pleasure throughout session
• Rock hard erection
• Twitching
• Pleasure at voluntary pelvic thrusting
• Integrating pelvic thrusting and contracting
• Large muscle quaking (no pleasure)
• Definite sense of ongoing subtle involuntary contraction
• Sense of pleasure caused by blood pulse internally
• Real excitement at thought of next session
• Moaning during sessions
• Sense of arousal moving toward something
• Involuntary clamping, without sense of climax
• Involuntary clamping with hint of climax
• Aneros moving distinctly on its own, creating unexpected pleasure

I've had some of my best 3 sessions so far, and each one seems to be a little better than the last. I think an important mental hurdle for me has been to try to enjoy the session on its own and not compare myself to other people. Earlier, I would often end the session disappointed that I hadn't reached the heights of others who had gotten pillow-screaming waves of endless orgasms for hours on end after only a few attempts, as well as feeling green with envy about the female ability to orgasm over and over. I would have to say that unfortunately, the wild testimonials that some guys have on this site, do make it harder for the other guys who are struggling with this...
This time, trying to just really relax and stop being so goal oriented really seemed to help. I now look forward to and get a little excited about my next session, when before it was something I had to "achieve".
My last session seemed like really good progress to a "higher plateau" than I have experienced in the past- with some really strong physical reactions to the aneros being inside me. No earth-shattering amount of pleasure, but some exciting and erotic feelings and that make me look forward to next time. It also lasted much longer, about three hours. I was really interested in seeing where it would go this time.
I used my Helix with coconut oil, which was solid, but quickly turns into oil in the heat of your hand and body. I found this to be the least messy and most comfortable lube that I have used so far for insertion. Even clean up was a breeze.
Immediately upon insertion, just in the recommended side position, one knee bent up towards the chest, it felt nice. Again, nothing earth-shattering- just "nice/erotic". After some relaxing in bed, I started to get some nice pulsing in my anus around the aneros. I don't know why, this was kind of a new feeling and also felt erotic/good. I just tried to continue to relax and enjoy this for what it was- not trying to have it "get me somewhere". At some point the aneros contracted inwards more strongly and I did get some involuntary contractions and movement (which I've gotten before). It often felt like either the prostate was swelling up to envelope the device, making it feel "much bigger". This movement did feel (especially on the "out" movement) that it slid across something and gave me, the briefest of brief "sliver" of pleasure. As soon as I felt it, I think I tensed up a little or just got too excited with butterflies in my stomach and lost it. However, if I relaxed again and let the pulsing begin again, the aneros on its own accord went in again and started some movement, sometimes leading to this elusive "sliver" of orgasmic feeling. Again, this tiny feelings were just a split second each. I wanted to feel this again and was able to get it 8-10 times, but they would always just slip away from me. The funny thing about these involuntary contractions: it remined me of using a Ouiji Board, sometimes it felt like the aneros was causing the contractions, but then it seemed like my mind was wanting them to do it was "making it/willing it to happen", they would always peter out though after about 30 secs-1 minute. If I relaxed, they would come back though. I think I even fell briefly asleep at a few points, only to be woken up again by movement.
After this phase, I started to get other different reactions. Some of them good, some just very strong and muscular but not necessarily pleasureable, but certainly can only be ascribed to the aneros doing it's job (I think). I would get some stronger contractions now either grinding in or pushing out. The grinding in felt "sexy". No"orgasmic" sensations, but the aneros would flutter and grind into me quite erotically. I tried to imagine myself some skinny, teenage slut having her hot, wet, pink pussy fingered, licked penetrated doggy-style and all of this aroused me greatly. I often whimpered into the pillow quite a few times as this all was a very arousing fantasy for me- feeling what a woman feels during sex! Anyway, this was all the best I've gotten so far and felt positive and encouraging. Enough to make me excited and want to come back for more...
Often this combination of movement and feelings sort of built-up into a crescendo- sometimes my leg would tense up stiff like a iron bar and my head would tremble uncontrollably (very weird).Then a huge amount of energy would then push the aneros to the other direction and my anus would contract REALLY HARD and try to PUSH the device out and hold it there- all the effort and energy in my body focused on this intense squeeze. And then dissipate and I would sink back down into the sheet once more and the "spell" would be broken. This cycle repeated itself probably 3-4 times. Finally, I got this MASSIVE series of contractions pushing out. One after another, I just let myself go. The energy my body was expelling was extremely intense, my entire core in extreme contraction. I had to grimace/gasp into the pillow as it was happening. I thought this might be the beggining of some sort of breakthrough- and then, the aneros shot out onto my inner leg. I was so disappointed! What the hell just happened?!? Is this normal?!? Honestly, it was one of the more bizarre physical reactions my body has produced.
So, I don't know hat really happened there. I re-inserted, but the magic was kind of lost by this point and almost three hours had transpired when I looked at my clock. I wrapped things up, and for the first time did not feel the need to end with traditional masturbation as I usually would. I felt like I had touched some new, unexpected places and decided to take some advice for the forum and leave the sexual feelings I had experienced "inside" and not end with penile orgasm.
So, I'll try again this week and will keep posting as new things happen. But the extreme contractions expelling the aneros out I'd love some feedback on!