I got to get me one of these.

Quite interesting...I’ve tried external massage but never approached the levels of pleasure I get from Aneros...thank you for sharing your experience.

I'm 48, have been married for 25y and the last 5 in a sexless, touch-less marriage.

Hey, welcome @somebody to the forum, as you can see here, you're not alone.

don't really care to label it

... is the best you can do.

Now I need to figure out how to get some "me time" to fully explore this new found pleasure.

Sometimes I pretend some tiredness and have a nap in the afternoon to have some "me time" in the bedroom. 😉

Always searching for methods to have some fun while lying next to her, while she's already sleeping, I lately stumbled upon foreskin and multiple ridged band play, two techniques for the uncircumcised man to have a lot of fun - utterly quiet, if he can suppress his moanings.

Good vibes to you! Mart

Two things that have helped rekindle my marriage. Ok, 3.
1. Re-centered my faith and prayer life.
2. Reddit Married Red Pill/youtube bluepillprofessor
3. Married Man's Sex Life Primer by Athol Kay.
sex is 2-3 times a week now.

Thanks all that replied.

Jaxsun: Having not had the pleasure of using the toy or tool (yet), depending on how you look at it, I may be just doing an end round around. This post from several months back ( https://community.aneros.com/community/for...op-contracting ) was the same thing I started out with (found this several days ago after having already gone through that initial introduction if you will), but I decided to embrace this as I had such good feelings the next few days even if it was hard to concentrate, walk,....... I just let it bring me where it wanted to go.

SOwithoutAnreos: I have been doing lots of reading on the forum, have made it to pg67 I think, and have been seeing so many others in the same position. It is such a shame, usually it is guys that have the "if I can't stick it in I don't want to do it" attitude. I would think most women would like the fact that we are now in the slow seat wanting to experience/savor every feeling and tingle. I think part of what got me going in this direction was the fact that I can do it without making any movements that would bring attention to myself and there is no rush like when I would just masturbate knowing that she would either huff, make some derogatory sound/comment or roll her eyes if I "got caught". I have tried the frenulum flick a few times, got a good dry orgasm once, fairly powerful and lasted some time but not since, I will have to revisit this now. Unfortunately I was clipped before I had a chance to detest, but I will look at the links any how, might pick up something that might work even w/o the extra skin.

yankeecowboy: I am happy that you were able to rekindle your marriage, but for me I wish it was that simple. The issues are more involved than I prefer to discuss here.

@somebody, I'm not sure, whether you really need that extra skin or whether you can only focus on that specific area. This morning I enjoyed a nearly motionless edging session not moving my fingers at all initating some awesome involuntaries and orgasms. I only had done this. As it's post #42 in that thread it may be ...
the "Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything", 😉

I will check that out, thanks SO. I need to do so much reading. I did do some reading of the stickies today though

Based on what is listed in the B's Keys thread describing looking for the 'sweet spot' seems this is what I stumbled upon prior to making my first post. I'm over stimulating this by doing it directly instead of the p-tab on the tool. I start off with a slightly firm pressure and as I feel pressure or swelling inside which I can only conclude is my prostate since I am completely flaccid, I reduce the pressure on this point to almost nothing the more excited I get. The tingle starts, the warmth floods, the tingle follows the warmth. sometimes fleeting, sometimes for what feels like an hour.

I can't wait till my tool of pleasure arrives to get the full experience I keep reading about, even if it is no more than what I got previously (was way more than I have ever experienced to this point in my life) at least my fingers won't go numb trying to keep a constant rhythm.

I can't wait ...

Don't hurry ... instead enjoy the moment ...

Ah yes, the star trek movie, I always thought she was hot. I know concentrate on he bird.;)

"Don't hurry" That is one thing I have found so far, If I don't stay mindful of my actions I will speed up and all will be lost. I have to concentrate to keep things moving at a very slow pace, still trying to brake that habit. I have found in the last week since my first post that for regular masturbation if I start flaccid and stroke very slow I will build to about just before p.o.n.r. and stay there provided I don't change my tempo, The longest so far has been 10 minutes, this causes my legs and stomach to just quiver.

I have also started introducing some nipple stimulation to the mix based on all the post encouraging the inclusion for more stimulus, It never did anything for me previously, but now a few light passes over the tip causes them to stiffen rapidly, my penis will stir and start to stiffen and I feel what I can only describe as a tickling sensation a few ribs down. Kind of like someone is touching me with a feather in just a single point.

The longest so far has been 10 minutes

If you like to train your endurance ... the benefit: the more control you have the better you can separate your orgasms from an ejaculation ... tease and denial is the name of the game ... if you don't want to determine* duration, difficulty level and whether to finally cum.
Btw, the foreskin and multiple ridged band play*, the two techniques* I mentioned before, are fully independent from having an erection or not, what helps to have up to hours of continuous joy from edging.
(*NSFW!)

The only reason I knew it was 10 minutes is I have a timer on the shower fan & I looked at it before starting to see how much time I had left to my "me time" than again when I got to a point I had enough even though I didn't want it to stop. Prior to loosely following tantra it was about 2-5 minutes start to finish, pleasure or not. That was the thing that pushed me back to the cruel reality of excess porn as 98% had no pleasure any more and being unable to continue even though I had the desire to want to try.

I am looking to train my endurance to not only last longer if the day should come either way but also to know and understand all the new orgasmic feelings I am being given in this sensual/sexual rebirth/mind change. I have seen that link to edgemeplease before and have it bookmarked but have not had the time to try it out.
I have read through the multi orgasmic man book, love satisfies book, and male multiple orgasms e-book.​​​​​​​ I have come a long way but still unable to have a dry penile orgasm, some day. till than I will revel in the current experience.

I have gone through the linked vids for the ridged band play and plan on trying them out while having my "me time" tonight.

@somebody, "edgemeplease" is text based, therefore 0 % porn, but be aware that the second link is pure porn. Don't want to throw you back to porn addiction. Instead I wish you all the joy the multiple ridged band and frenulum teasing gave me during the last nights and I hope you keep us posted. Good vibes to you, enjoy every single moment of your journey! Perhaps start to write you own blog, it often helps me to remember fantastic experiences already overwritten by the next awesome discovery of new blissful sensations.

Thanks SO. I did check both links but found the second to just give me a picture. I haven't sworn off porn completely, but it has been 95% reduced. Enough to remind me what I used to enjoy/experience I just don't masturbate while watching any more. I still enjoy watching two women pleasure each other wishing I was in the middle helping.:D

I think I will start a blog thing to keep notes on what I find works and doesn't along w/ progression. I just need to find it now.

@somebody, meanwhile I mostly don't masturbate to porn either. While watching I instead more often only emphasize with the actors despite of their gender and let Aless start over. Sometimes it already felt like transcending into a kind of virtual reality.
The blog section is easy to find, you only click on „LEARN“ on the top of this page, then choose „BLOGS“. As there is a mean timeout option set, out of a sudden and without warning kicking you out of your blog editor, please be sure to write your post in an external text editor, copy it, then login on the blogs page and paste your text there. Otherwise a lot of work might be deleted as some frustrating experiences have taught me.

I did a quick look for the blogs but did not check there. Thanks for informing me of the direction to the blogs and the timer feature. That would suck very much as I type painfully slow and have a hard time getting my thoughts in a good order.

I tried the 2 techniques you had listed earlier, seems I'm cut to deep for either to work. It felt like I was just sliding my finger over skin, no tingles, no nothing from the other side unless I made some contact with the crown.

Regarding your letting the aless start over. I have been experiencing the dull ache I have been reading about for about two a weeks now since the initial wake up call. I am now able to convert that feeling of ache to a feeling of increased tension (kind of like over stimulating one spot on the head, gets real intense) but have as of yet got it to release and spread out the orgasmic feelings. I'll get it yet.

Had another fairly good session last night after several days of duds (I have to keep reminding myself to slow down as I get over zealous to get to the good stuff). No feelings of floating this time but once the tension released it's grip the orgasm started in my lower back around my kidney area and radiated outwards up my back and down my legs, warm and tingly.

I get over zealous to get to the good stuff

Remember,

"it's really the wand that chooses the wizard". 😉
Freely based on Harry P.

Therefore you can only celebrate everything that happens and stay ready for more. The best is yet to come - not to do!

Concerning your multiple ridged band it really maybe that you've been deprived of your male clit. But the reason why I'd nevertheless wouldn't give up to awake this spot is that lately I'm not even moving my finger as if the sensitve spot would be under the skin. I only put my forefinger or my thumb on that area and focus on that spot. I just even started to get feelings from focusing alone.

Good vibes! Mart

Perhaps for me the ridged band stimulation is like any of the other new feelings that are being experienced, since I don't have the main nerve ends any more to be excited directly I need to focus on the underlying sensations. Just like when learning the feelings from prostate stimulation, what may seem like nothing might be the beginning to something good, just need to "wake it up".

Like you said the best is yet to come.

@somebody, if you only can stick to this mindset, I'm sure it will lead you to a never expected realm of bliss.

I need to focus on the underlying sensations.

With this issue my morning routine helped me a lot.

Good vibes! Mart

Interesting routine. I myself am not a morning person, never have been. Perhaps at night before bed this might work.

As a side note I tried the frenulum stimulation again last night. Had a strange happening, no sensations felt at all but I just came, was very unnerving seeing fluid leaving w/o feeling any indicators it was going to happen.

I just came, was very unnerving seeing fluid leaving w/o feeling any indicators it was going to happen.

Sure you really came and not only oozed precum? Have you already read about or experienced ruined orgasms?

I have experienced ruined orgasms, did them to myself to keep things going longer when alone or during sex to slick things up. I am fairly sure it was an ejaculation as it was quite white unlike precum that is water clear, or prostate fluid that has a haze to it (had that one a few times trying to reach a dry orgasm), not clear but not white either. When I realized it was happening and stopped stimulating I got even harder, like when I am trying to get a dry orgasm but am on the brink and some cum oozes but not a full ejaculation.

I wonder if this particular stimulation for some reason invoked ejaculation just based on the parasympathetic nerve system stimulation based on the fact that there was no sympathetic nerve response. Just thinking out loud here.

@somebody, I experienced a great variety of ruined orgasms. My can come along with an ejaculation, but the more experienced I am, the more often I only have these slow releases of cum without any spurting. And to me they are the best and most exciting, if my cum only oozes out slowly - "like peaceful waters flow". 😎

It has been a few days and I have realized a few things that seem to be working for me. I still have not had any "me time" to try out the new tool and refuse to rush it for the sake of saying I tried it. I want to do it right.

I'm still progressing in other ways. Wednesday night I had another wonderful floating on air orgasm almost like the first time but this one stopped when the orgasm ended than started again on the next orgasm. I did this 3 times.
Yesterday my prostate was screaming at me with not just an ache but almost grabbing me by the balls and saying I'm right here pay me some attention. So last night I had some quiet time while watching tv and she was on the computer, so i was rubbing along enjoying myself when this orgasm started to swell, got more intense than any previous experiences and just lingered there. Legs, stomach and forehead were tingling like I was doing a post orgasm torture rub on my head but it wasn't painful like p.o.t., the tingle started to move up from my stomach towards my chest and found my vision starting to get tunnel like when she started down the hall. SHIT! had to bring this to an abrupt end when I was so close to falling off the clif.
While in the shower for my "20 minute me time" I was riding the edge of the wave and slipped off, I don't think I've ever oosed so much cum. When I tried in bed after this event I did get a small tingle but no other feelings. Today, same thing, not really feeling it.

Now in saying this what have been my findings? I have been doing SR for a bit now and I range from 5 to 10 days (last night was day 5, I think the first time I posted I was at day 7 but don't remember), edging for about 10 minutes a night. I have also been using a cock ring for about a week now all the time that goes around all the package (I want to get one of those awesome metal ones from gear essential). This has done several things for me. the ring is rubbing on the perineum causing arousal. I also like the way my testicles feel being rubbed by underwear, again causing arousal. The one thing I am still getting used to is waking up several times a night with a rock hard erection that begs to be played with, so I pay some attention to it for a few minutes and it than goes back to sleep.

In conclusion for me SR is essential, being completely aroused is also essential to reach the high peaks. I can start out w/ low arousal but don't get as high or last as long.

If you like to train your endurance ... the benefit: the more control you have the better you can separate your orgasms from an ejaculation ... tease and denial is the name of the game ... if you don't want to determine* duration, difficulty level and whether to finally cum.
Btw, the foreskin and multiple ridged band play*, the two techniques* I mentioned before, are fully independent from having an erection or not, what helps to have up to hours of continuous joy from edging.
(*NSFW!)

@SOwithoutAneros I want to thank you for encouraging me to continue this pursuet in a later post. I have continued to stimulate my remaining frenulum to get accustom to the minor sensations I experience and start to really zone in on them. Last night during my foray I was in a good state, enjoying the electric tingle all over my body when I decided to reach down and lightly pinch between my thumb and finger in a rolling type movement my frenulum. Up to this point I have never stimulated my penis while stimulating any other parts. This blew me right over the edge. My body suddenly involuntarily tensed and my stomach started to spasm. I rode this for what felt like maybe 15-20 seconds. After this subsided all tension in my body released and I just sunk into the bed and no amount of further stimulation to try to lift myself back up created any response from my body so I went to sleep. Very exciting progress.

@somebody, being uncut I never teased my frenulum, rather avoided to touch it because of its high sensitivity. Since my rewiring and coming across that foreskin awareness site I'm utterly amazed at its capabilities. Admittedly my own frenulum discovery seems to be only at its very beginning. This morning I decided to tease my frenulum in a new way. I put four fingers of my left hand on my ballsack while my thumb held against my member's root to point him to the ceiling. With forefinger and thumb of my right hand I gently grabbed my frenulum for only perhaps half a second. This most tender and brief frenulum grabbing made me horny like crazy and brought me extremely close to the edge as if I had stroked at highest speed for a minute or so. I waited up to half a minute before I touched it again. Later when already wet with precum I started slow-mo stroking and rubbed the natural lube across the glans and in rotating moves into my frenulum. I ended with two perfectly ruined TOs. Awesome!
Enjoy! Mart

I got time today to try out my new pleasure tools. I have purchased both the helix & mgx just to have variety. I woke up early (5:30) before she did, was excited for my first attempt. prepped the mgx first as it looked smaller in size even though I have read it really isn't. I went back to bed and relaxed. After about 10 minutes I no longer felt the "full feeling" in fact I didn't feel it at but I could feel it moving up/down with each contraction/release. I tried both sides and my back, nothing. I reached down and rubbed my perineum to see if it was the same place as the p-tab location and it was(this solidifies my earlier thoughts that's what I was stimulating before the fabled sweet spot) as I started to get the tingle. I decided to just lay there and try the do nothing approach, let my body get used to this foreign object pressing on my prostate. I must have dozed off because I woke about an hour later to this feeling of waves or better description pulses enveloping my body. At first I thought it was my heart pounding causing the pulses but when I focused on my heart beat I found it wasn't beating that hard or that fast. These pulses were coming twice as fast as my heart beat and before I knew it they were gone. No tingling or electric feeling, just pulses. I tried light contractions to see if I could bring them back but no luck. It was 8:30 and I had things to do so I cleaned up.

Around lunch she wasn't feeling well and went to bed so I decided to try the helix. I found this one to be much more mobile and more filling feeling than the mgx and also found the p-tab to not drive in so deep, no pain or discomfort was felt with the mgx just an observation. Laid on the couch and ran thru some contraction/release along with alternating some do nothing. I started to get some electric tingle in my prostate each time it slid up (I can really feel the helix moving) but did not progress to any more than that. I did find the level of contraction needed to invoke the flutter of muscles and tried like hell to hold that but found it to be very difficult to maintain as I either tensed more or loosened up. I decided to stop after 90 minutes. Let my body process what has happened today.

I think it was a good start as I am having to sort of retrain myself as I have learned to release all tension in my groin to bring about orgasm while massaging externally as I found at the time the fluttering of my rectal/perineum muscles to be a no gain step at that time, makes me wish I hadn't but on the flip side I most likely never would have pursued this if I hadn't had an orgasm the other way. I am going to start documenting this in a blog and this will be the first entry there and the last here unless someone decides to reply. Thanks all for reading.