Feedback needed on my long journey and couple of questions

Hi all,

My journey started a looooong time ago, about 10-12 years ago. Throughout I would have period where I would have sessions on a regular basis than it would be quiet for some time until the cycle started again. I've gone through the Helix, the Progasm (which didn't do anything at all) and a few non-Aneros models that also didn't really pan out. Three years ago I started suffering from major depression and I have been on a medication since then and my MGX (which is the only model I have now) has been sitting quietly in my toy box since then, it sure didn't help that the medications I took killed my libido. For the last couple of months though I have started taking another medication which is supposed to not affect sexual drive, for me it still does but to a lesser extent and my desire to resume massaging sessions have slowly come back.

Even though I had long quiet periods it seemed that my anus has (and still continues a bit) to permanently loosen, just enough so that inserting my MGX would fit comfortably. Also, even though I don't believe I've experienced Super O's yet I have grown fond of the feeling I get with a massager inserted, so I guess some rewiring has occurred.

I believe that the biggest hurdle for me was lubrication. I cannot recall the many combination of different lubes I tried so far, it seems that whatever I throw at my anus it will soak it up in no time and the massager mobility will come to a screeching halt. This will inevitably bring pauses so that I could relub, boy talk about a mood killer.

At some point during those years, I don't actually recall when, my precum production really kicked into gear and now I produce it in significant quantity during masturbation, intercourse or even just plain arousal. So, again I guess some rewiring happened along the way.

One thing that didn't seem to have been completely rewired are my anus muscles. I still takes me about 30-45 minutes for them to relax completely until I can let the involuntary contractions do their thing, otherwise I feel that mobility is severely reducedand thus not as pleasurable as can be

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With all that said and done here I am today in the cusp of a period where I want to use my massager and since that period started, about 3-4 weeks ago, it feels that I am reaching milestone after milestone. I have come into this period with zero expectations and I decided to mostly let my muscle dictate the pace (as in "do nothing") and once my anus was comfortable and the involuntary contractions would start I would simply help to steer it from time to time, which brings to the second biggest milestone and it happened this week-end.

I would do what I just described and it would reach a point where the massager would have a life of it's own, it would rock back and forth over my prostate, bringing a sharp localized sensation of pleasure for what felt like periods of 20-40 seconds. I would relax just for a second and could start the whole process again without any refractory rest and repeated that over an hour. During that time precum production went through the roof and I would feel it drip along the side of my thigh in slow spurts and this would bring immense pleasure that felt like someone was slowly pulling a feather out of my penis, pretty cool.

Lastly, my biggest milestone came last night. Between this week-end and last night I received two items that I bought, a jar of Boy butter and a lube applicator. Already it feels that the latter is one of the best purchase of my life as the massager could finally swim freely in my anus and it never felt that comfortable. Since the amount of lube was bigger than any previous session so far in my life it felt like I didn't need to contract a lot to make the massager move. I was so lubed up that the slightest contraction would send the massager flying and so I am finally getting rid of the ever present friction that plague me since the beginning. It really feels like I am breaking down one of the last barrier that stands between me and super O's. I still stopped at one point to relub but maybe it was out of habit because when I removed the massager it was still very slippery. Now if this week-end session produce a copious amount of precum lat night's session produced a deluge! I could also reach the stage where there was no need for refractory period between periods of high pleasure.

I forgot to mention that ever since I started doing sessions again the days after I would feel my prostate tingle from time to time especially when I am sitting. This sure help build up my arousal and libido back to a normal state.

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Now that this is all said and done I have no clue where I stand on the Super O scale, in your opinion, do think I am at the mini O stage, the dry stage or the Super O stage?

Now that my sessions feels so good I will do more but I don't want to overdue it, what is the recommended rest period between sessions?

I am also thinking about purchasing the Helix Syn, it may be counter intuitive but my impression is that the silicone layer will bring more friction than the plastic material in the regular model. Am I out of the ballpark here?

Thanks !