Cancer, Erectile Dysfunction, and the Blessing of Aneros

I am a married man and an anal cancer survivor clean now for two and a half years. I was having ED issues before the diagnosis because of age (I'm now 57) along with prostate issues for which I had a TURP surgery. After the smoke of radiation and chemo had settled I was told that I probably had nerve damage in my genital area that would prohibit me from having intercourse again. The answer then offered was a penile implant which looked good on the surface but once I started to watch YouTube videos and research it a bit, it was not on my top 10 things to do list.

So oral sex, masturbation and the introduction of anal stimulation between my wife and I has become standard operating procedure and I must say very pleasant, but not quite the same as being intimate via intercourse.

I have tried a lot of things: cock rings of different makes and materials, cock ties, lubes, pills: viagra, cialis, penile suppositories, vitamins, Testosterone injections, exercise, meditation, praying, and the list goes on without much success in finding a way to stay hard enough for intercourse in any position. I have struggled with mild depression and certainly the feelings of not being enough of a man, not truly satisfying my wife, etc...

I'm not sure how it happened, but I stumbled on prostate massage and orgasms WITHOUT an erection... bingo! Now that got my attention.

That lead inevitably to Aneros and to my purchase of a Helix and MGX about 5 plus months ago. I began to read the forums, blogs, and chat online with folks who had had the experience of non traditional orgasms without ejaculation. My hope began to rise. With my wife on board, cheer leading me on to do my "exercises" (Aneros sessions) I sheepishly began to expand my experience and knowledge about orgasms separate from ejaculation, multiple male orgasms and if there is a difference from female ones... Along with reading about Tantric and other ancient sexual practices and beliefs.

The idea of full body orgasms without an erection was introduced on the forum and in the chat room again and again... and as I continued my exercises I began to experience for myself the faint beginnings of it all being true.

My sessions taught me to be patient, listen for unusual feelings, meaning I learned to become sensitive to new, gentle, quiet, whispers of pleasure that if you chase after them, they disappear! So you need to sense them and GENTLY get underneath them and encourage them. As this happened, I was introduced to wafts of pleasure - as in gentle breezes - that moved from wherever they started across my body. The first time it happened I called my wife and then burst into the chat room declaring my victory/discovery.

The next hurrah was having these orgasmic waves while driving my car! I thought maybe I was having heart or blood pressure problems. But nope. Just the aftermath of celebrating an anniversary with my wife. The waves came accompanied by deep feelings of love and appreciation for my lover and best friend who is my wife. So now I am at the place of being surprised by these little breezes that can come any time but usually the day after being with my wife in close intimate ways. What an unintended consequence for both me AND my wife, of learning to derive pleasure from my prostate and anus rather than my penis!

Another wonderful surprise has been that my feeling down and depressed about not having intercourse has abated enough that the other day we actually had more than a few moments of deep intensely exciting and appreciated intercourse!

I now have spontaneous erections at night (not associated with having to pee) and have found joy in just being sexual again in whatever form it takes at the moment. I'm not having intercourse to ejaculation yet, and I may not ever. That said, I am becoming more and more satisfied experiencing the fulness my sexuality takes, so the lack becomes less and less powerful and I become more relaxed and ok with what is. I'm very grateful for Aneros and the community here who have and continue to encourage and cheer me on 🙂

If you are a newbie, be patient, learn to be relaxed, and read all you can by B Mayfield, Rumel and anybody else on the forum you think might give you information that is useful to you. Chat with the folks in the chatroom, there are many who like myself have experienced anal and prostate joy who now want to give back... and you can learn to appreciate the rewiring of your body and mind in beautiful and erotic ways that you may never have known before...