A Wife's Perspective

😕 I have read so much about the Aneros! I love my husband and wanted a way to make his orgasm more intense. This sounded perfect. I ordered it and surprised him with it. He was leary of it. I showed him some of the web sites I have looked at and he started to seem curious. He said he would try it. I told him he could try it alone first if he wanted but he said he wanted me there with him. That was a couple of months ago. He hasn't mentioned it and I'm afraid to push it. I really wish I could find some viseo of a man using this. Visual might get him more than words. Any ideas? Jane? Anyone?

Pinkhawk

Pinkhawk,

Have you engaged in anal play together previously? It's possible that introducing some gentle anal massage, particularly at the right moment (when he's highly aroused) might be a prelude for some mention of the Aneros.

BF Mayfield

Pinkhawk,

Have you engaged in anal play together previously? It's possible that introducing some gentle anal massage, particularly at the right moment (when he's highly aroused) might be a prelude for some mention of the Aneros.

BF Mayfield

Hi, and thanx for the response,
I have tried "some gentle anal massage" but I wasn't even sure he noticed it until I gave him the Aneros. Then he said he understood why I had been going "there" more.
I really want him to feel the things Ive been reading about, but maybe he's just not ready.
PINKHAWK

And it was a huge success. I have a very, very happy guy who is completely delighted with his new toy.

Now I can feel all smug that I'm such a good girlfriend, but unfortunately I can't brag to anyone about how great the gift I got him was. 😉

if men would let go..let theiir female partners fuck them in the ass..we'd all be happier...its not gay..we all love it cause it feels good..ur ass is like a pussy..it likes being fucked..we have done this for years...its no big deal..nothing gay..shit..its about feeling good
she likes it..i like it..omg...

Amy and Melissa,
It's such a pity that when a girl likes anal play during sex, her boyfriend objects.
I had a very sexually repressed childhood, the son of a nurse who was the most sexually inhibited person I ever knew and who was like a bloodhound when it came to checking if I had taken up masturbation.
Before I was five years old I began to derive pleasure from touching my bottom (anus). I was strangely thrilled to think of "putting my finger in my bottom." When I started school I would look to see if any little girl in my class had her hand up her dress as I would think she was putting her finger in her bottom. When I was seven I would slide my left hand up my short trouser leg, outside my underpants, until I was sitting on the palm of my hand. I would then crook my middle finger upwards and press it against my anus. Such a lovely feeling!
After I started masturbating at the age of nine I would finger my anus and then hold the finger against my nose and sniff it during the process while thinking that the smell was from a girl whose knickers I had glimpsed. I used to think how lucky their knickers were to be cuddled against their little bottoms. I often wished I could sniff around up their skirts.
I then started pushing a clinical thermometer up my bottom and wiggling it about when I masturbated and this was like heaven.
So here am I today, liking the smell of dirty knickers and the smell of bottom on my finger. I would love to "finger sniff" almost any woman's bottom. I must admit I do not like the smell of poo but I can put up with it if it is from a woman. I would just love to have a woman fiddle with my anus and insert an aneros Helix or a peridise up it. Similarly, I would love to do the same for her.
I love female hair, on the head and under the arms and in the genital area. I also like hair to grow low on the brow and temples and I love downy hair on the arms and legs. I love the smell of female underarm perspiration and I would love to have my nose touching the knicker crotch of a woman sitting on the floor with her legs arched up.
When having intercourse I like to have something up my bottom being wiggled and stroked in and out by my wife who, incidentally puts up and accepts my likings but does not share them in any way. In fact I feel embarrassed to ask her.
Summing it all up, I love to sniff dirty knickers especially when masturbating or having intercourse. I love having something up my bum. I enjoy having enemas and colonics and the feeling when the, (it must be a female) nurse inserts the rubber catheter gently into my rectum and then pushes it up inside me. I can masturbate anally using a rubber enema catheter and I do believe the orgasm is better than when achieved solely via my penis.
I have utterly accepted my sexual desires and believe I am very lucky to have such "gifts." I think most men are inhibited because they think they might be branded as a "queer" and because they think all body smells, be they from women or men, are repulsive. Some proof of this is the lengths women go to to ensure that they have clean knickers when on a date and that they have "freshened up."
One last little confession from me. I like the smell of a woman when she is wearing a large un-deodorised sanitary towel during her period. The smell is a lovely "cuddly fishy" smell and so sexy.
So there it is, off my chest. Many thanks for letting me write this. I intend to buy a Helix and a peridise soon but think that the ones destined to go up a woman's bottom are much luckier than mine will ever be.

Jane,
You are a very wonderful wife.
Mine has not had intercourse since 1989, only some play every once in awhile. She had a historectomy in the '80's and I guess her harmones are gone. She won't even talk about sex or discuss anything that has to do with it. She does not care about how I feel or what I need.
I have purchased the Progasm but have not had any luck with it at all. Would your husband have any suggestions?

Hi Jane,

I'm a 46 yr old wife and our marriage is in our 27th year. Our sex life has always been great and we do communicate openly about our sexual desires and interest in new toys. Things don't work as well as they used to and it is because of this that I stumbled upon Aneros while surfing the net. I am definitely placing an order as we speak! I think that my husband will be very pleased when I introduce him to Aneros... and so will I!

In reading all the feedback on Aneros, I sense that it will help in these areas of concern and much, much more. I enjoy anal sex (tremendously) and I have also explored him (limited) in this area. Lately the stamina has lacked and he cums before I get around to it. This also limits us in anal penetration, causing him frustration and I want to help. Because he takes medication for High Blood Pressure, I avoid him taking Viagra for fear of consequences.

I have always enjoyed fellatio and sometimes I can't really say which I enjoy most: oral or vaginal penetration. Yeah, I enjoy it that much and I completely enjoy swallowing. You mentioned that with the continued use of Aneros, even the cum taste has improved and that caught my attention. Not that I don't like how he tastes, I have continued to enjoy it ever since we were dating as teenagers.

However, does this mean that by him using Aneros, the taste of his cum will improve? How so?

I still plan to do more research on prostate milking to keep his healthy and free of cancer.

Anxiously awaiting your response.

Veronica

Veronica,

Jane, the original author of this thread hasn't been around in quite a while now. I hope you don't mind someone answering in her stead. You may know by now that the Aneros was originally designed as a prostate massager. The gentle massaging action of this device increases circulation in the prostate and has been of aid to many with conditions such as prostatitis and BPH (enlargement of the prostate). Furthermore, the stimulation that the Aneros provides, assures an ejaculation of much greater volume,... the gland is really emptied. I remember quipping at one time that I felt as if I had let loose with something that was left over from my teen years! lol. Others have spoken about the Aneros really "cleaning their pipes".

The point is that prostate is more healthy when there is greater circulation in and around it. Does this make the ejaculate taste better? Well, you would have to be the judge of that for yourself. But I will tell you that several users have indicated that it is the case.

As an aside, I greatly admire your openness concerning anal exploration. How terrific it is that you enjoy this yourself...and that you want to share this with your partner. (Lucky guy!)

With respect to "milking" this generally refers to a forced extraction of fluids from the prostate. While I am aware that some have used the Aneros in this way, it was not designed for this.....and I do not recommend it. The fact is that it takes some training to safely "milk" a man's prostate. This activity carries some potential for harm if not done properly. Regular use of the Aneros by contrast is gentle and safe. It's pretty much impossible for one to hurt themselves as it is ones own anal contractions that drive the device. If you have any further questions, don't hesitate to let us know.

All the best,

BF Mayfield

About Jane. Trust a woman!! My God. How I wish women were ruling the world. what a much better place it would be! THANK YOU JANE> Tomasheen.

Oh good some more women! I thought that I would be the only woman posting on this site. I was thinking of surprising my husband by getting him one and would like to thank you for your comments. Next payday, I will be purchasing one and will keep you posted!

They are quite expensive, but then I suppose rampant rabbits are overpriced, overhyped and don't have the health benefits associated with the Aneros.

Hi IlyenaMiranda,

Welcome to the Aneros Forums, your best source of information for learning about the multiple benefits and joys of using the Aneros prostate massagers. Rather than steal from one of our Aneros Guru's please let me refer you to 'BF Mayfield's introductory post to another female member. Being female, you are obviously in the minority on this site, however, please do not feel intimidated by the swirling pools of male testosterone. There are numerous insights into the male psyche to be had here by observant women. Some of your sister members, such as 'Alana', 'Boston Babe', 'buttercup', 'happygirl', 'hiswife', 'Lilylol', 'lynn2694', 'midnitebelle51', 'musicman', 'NunyaGA', 'nurselady', 'Yoshiko' and 'zaneblue' (Marenna Lindberg – Author of “The Orgasmic Diet” for women) have contributed their own insights as well, so you are definitely not alone here.

Just so you don’t feel in any way left out of the Aneros learning experience may I also suggest you checkout the Peridise model for use by yourself alone or during concurrent play sessions with your S.O. This model was developed for both men and women’s enjoyment. In spite of its diminutive size this little jewel is quite a potent stimulator.

P.S. I sent you an introductory PM with some additional hints and tips to help your man get started. This pre-written text is intentionally addressed to males but hopefully you will convey this information to your man.

IlyenaMiranda, as Rumel noted you are not alone - there are a some other women around on this forum. Welcome!
Nurselady

I'm so glad to find such an open community- it's really helpful. I'm buying one for my husband...he's 40- I'm a bit younger, and we've been together for about 10 years. We've always used and enjoyed toys- but they're almost always for women. I want him to have that "peel me off the ceiling" legs shaking, toes curling, screaming orgasm like I have. So I bought the MGX model for him. He's very quiet, and he's not a prude, he just never really introduces anything to spice up our sex lives either. It's always at my insistance. He's never brought anything home, or even said "hey this looks interesting". I really don't relish the idea of inserting anything into his anus- nor does he want to recprocate (I've offered on a few occasions). It's just not our scene- I'm sold on the health benefits, and pleasing my man. I'm dealing with the anal part because that seems to be the way to do it.So anyway- I bought the MGX, along with a sleeve for our Magic Wand, and some Tenga Eggs (it's his birthday). My plan was to open all of the packages and place them in his nightstand. He knows that it's coming, and I told him that he should fly solo with it for a few times so he can get used to the sensations on his own terms. There's almost no chance he'll discuss it, so I'm left wondering what to do. I just don't know how to encorporate it into our bedroom activities. I'm thinking let him insert it, and then proceed as usual- at least for the first few times, and then see how it goes? I'd love to watch him have a super o, but I think that will probably take a while and some practice. I'm looking to get us both into the idea of adding even a small bit of enhancement into our sex lives, and building from there.Does that sound reasonable?Also is there a lube that works better than others? We generally have a thin water-based lube around at all times. Does he need something thicker?

Happywife, you have one lucky hubby - I hope he realizes that!

Much has been written here on lubes. My personal favorite is slippery stuff gel, it's relatively safe (not all lubes are safe for anal play) and very effective. There is also a lube applicator for sale on the Aneros site that you may want to investigate (it's basically a 5ml syringe with a nozzle suitable for applying lube directly to the rectum).

Happywife,

I agree with RJT, your husband is lucky. I'm happily married and my wife knows all about my Aneros use. She encourages it. It has improved our sex life in many ways. One suggestion: When he has his Aneros in, avoid stimulating his penis. The prostate orgasms the Aneros generates are completely different and separate from penile orgasms and ejaculation. Penis stimulation during an Aneros "session" can disconnect the prostate pleasure your husband will experience. That has been my experience. And believe me the prostate pleasure and orgasms are pretty intense. Expect a pretty exciting time experiencing his journey. Let him solo so he can get used to the whole thing. Being together when he has it in is a whole other realm of experience.

Have fun!!

Brian

Thanks guys! The luck goes both ways...the reason I went shopping is to make him as happy as he makes me. I love the idea of a paradigm shift away from the standard "insert somewhere warm, preferably moist, thrust, repeat". It never gets old (at least for me)- but there just has to be something else for him too. Hopefully this is it, or at least the start of an interesting journey.

I got a pm from Rumel with all sorts of helpful info- hopefully I can use it to start a dialogue.

at Cottonpicker- The sexual response of a woman isn't that much different than a man's- we have erectile tissue too, it just looks a bit different. It is a "use it or lose it" type of thing though- if the blood flow isn't making it's way down there then her response will be stunted enough for her to think "why bother". There are some arousal creams that do work for that, and plain old suction to get the blood flow to the area works too.

Happywife,

I would hold off on abstaining from penile contact as one user suggested for the time being. If husband is a little stand-offish about anal play to begin with, it's often a good idea to incorporate that which is new with something more familiar. Besides, as you surmised, he will require some solo time to explore the non-ejaculatory applications of this device anyway. For couples I generally recommend exploring a different path, that of using the Aneros to amplify a traditional orgasm (ejaculation). Give Rumel's introductory PM a read and don't forget we have a fairly comprehensive WIKI here as well.

You can always post any questions that you might have or PM the members directly as well.

Cheers!

BF Mayfield

thank you ladies for your imput on the aneros
i been using mine on myself for month finaly i did get some clear liquid discharge
i am in chastity
my wife does not like nor care for sex but she does not want me looking,masterbating or looking at porn
im 60 wife is 59 an the chastity came into play i use to use butt plug to massarge my prostate but took to long to sore an get tired
i likethe aneros very much an hands free which is much better

i'm 61 wife is 61 also.she's very accomodating as her sex drive is all but gone(menopause).she really likes to be with during sessions and gets a real kick out of my OOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSS. and watching me cum.hang in there!!!!

After reading this... I LOVE YOU SIOBHAN!!!! My sincerely awesome girlfriend of 5 years, friend for more than 10 and wife in two months is open minded, adventurous, and loves to play in the bedroom. For valentines day this year she bought me a new "toy". A Aneros of course! She simply stated that she had read about them online and wanted me to have one. She thought it was horribly unfair that she always has multiple orgasms and I saddly cannot. So, she wanted to try this on me. I had wanted to try one of these for years myself but honestly would have forgone it due to the fact that I did not want her to perceive me as something I am not. Gay. Or less masculine. The phobia of anal stimulation is very real from many perspectives and mine was simply my mistaken perception that I would be seen as less of a man. How wrong I was. Although I haven't seen any of the big Os or little os at this point it is still incredible and the stimulation is fantastic. The first use she inserted it in me, stimulated me and kept me that way waiting to see what happened. It kept me hard as a rock and the stimulation was fantastic and when I did ejaculate it was intense! I am soooo looking forward to becomming multi orgasmic like her and to experience a new kind of orgasm. Once again, I love my soon to be wife! She is awesome!

Girls do this for your guys!!

My wife isn't into me using mine at all. I love my progasm. But I get turned off every time I talk about using it, and she's like...hmmm...well, ok baby, whatever makes you happy. (with a disapproving tone in her voice). It's frustrating. But it's exciting to her and me both when she's in the mood for her Phallix glass dildo (her personal favorite, appropriately named the Wii). ;)any suggestions on how to get her on board on how amazing this thing is? I only use it once in a while, but I love it. Have not achieved hands-free Super-O yet, but still working on it. Either way, it heightens anything alse that happens in the BR.

IMO Don't try to get her on board. What you are experiencing is outside her knowledge and comprehension (and is so for most males as well!!!). No matter how much you try it may only increase the barrier. She is happy for you if it makes you happy - wow, that is a real positive so be private and enjoy. Her negative voice may be because it does not compute with her understanding. Too much trying might be interpreted as manipulation. The only parallel may be a G spot O for her but my partner would disagree and say , it is not. You have the prostate she just does not! Females sexual interest is different from males. I feel one of the problems we have with our new experience is we "want" every one to share in it because it is so good. Few people, however, can take it on board. There is a lot of wisdom in this thread but essentially a person has to be ready.

isvara,

I’m with you brother!

I don’t know your age, but I was unfortunate enough to have been brought up during the 1940s and 1950s. This seems to have been a time of very suppressed sexual expression. I vividly remember, at the age of 21, fleeing from the flat of a woman who was eight years older than I, after she had tried to persuade me to commit cunnilingus on her. I was quite literally horrified! It took me several years to recover from that experience.

As a result, I didn’t have sex with my fiancée until just a few days before our wedding. We have now been married for approaching 50 years and she is still in some ways quite repressed. She was born of a mother who swore that sex was only for procreation! I should add that my wife is almost three years older than I am.

I do wish I knew back in the 60’s what I know now! I wouldn’t have married anyone else but I would have prepared my fiancée better for the wealth of fun that I now know is available to us.

As it is, I introduced the topic of Aneros use for its therapeutic uses and this was accepted. A few months ago, I attempted to familiarise her with its use by inserting one in her presence. This was greeted with a sort of disdain and a distinct lack of will to be further involved. As she sees it “this has all come too late”!

Pommie

A sexless marriage is very sad. I know because I'm in one. I'd like to try to turn it around but it would take both of us and I'm not sure we're both committed to it.

I definitely don't want to end up like the old Irish woman who told the priest on her deathbed, when he asked if she had any regrets, "my only regret, Father, is that I never got enough dick."

But I'm surely headed in that direction.

Hi guys, this question is for you. I was looking for a way
to give my boyfriend the kind of pleasure he gives me and I discovered prostate
orgasms. I have become obsessed and must admit the idea really turns me on but I tend
to shy away from things I don’t have experience in because I worry about my
performance. So I was doing some research and I stumbled upon the aneros. I
thought it would solve my performance anxieties so I bought one and last night
I licked his anus and perineum in hopes of getting him used to that kind of
touch (he has always been into anal play/sex with me but when I asked him a few
weeks ago if he would enjoy it he said he had never had it done to him but he
seemed open to it.)  Afterwards I asked
how he liked it and he said he loved when I licked the perineum but the anus just
tickled. So I brought up that i wanted to try again later because I had heard prostate orgasms could be amazing and
once again he seemed politely interested and asked how to have one. I told him
toys were one way and he said he would not have sex with something in his ass. I
asked, “why not, I do” and he said, “not toys” (it’s always his finger or
penis). He has always seemed to have a problem with toys. If he ever sees that
I have used my toys without him he gets very hurt. I recently found Viagra in
his cabinet (he doesn’t know I know) and I think he worries that he isn’t satisfying
me, he’s 40 and I am 32 and just got out of a sexless marriage so my libido is
high but he fully satisfies me and that’s why I want to do more for him. So I don’t
know if I should even bring up the aneros and, if so, should I mention the
health benefits? I think if I do bring it up I will need to get past my
performance anxieties and ease him into any anal play, do you guys have any
suggestions?  On a side note - you may be interested to know research is being done showing that skene's gland (gland that causes women to squirt) actually has more in common with the prostate and is now being renamed the female prostate by a lot of physcians.

That's very interesting, ahhhmazing. Which model did you get? If he's mildly averse to it, a smaller model would be better to start with. Bear in mind that it can take guys a long time for the pleasure of a prostate multiple orgasm to kick in. We're talking weeks to months of practice. Our upbringing has not prepared us for it.

Start very small and work up. Perhaps next time you could trace your finger around the opening of his anus and dip the tip of your finger inside by a fraction of an inch. (But not if you have talon-like long fingernails -- that would hurt.) See how he likes that. Tickle his perineum and the base of his scrotum with light strokes at the same time. Take it slowly. If you get an involuntary shiver out of him, you'll be doing well.

If you're not averse to this, work up to you fingering his prostate during sex. Then if that's going well, perhaps mention that you can't reach inside far enough to do a proper job without straining yourself, but you've thought of a solution, and it has health benefits too...

I got the helix, what do you think? Too big to start? I'm not adverse to using my finger, thinking about it turns me on but when it comes time to do it I hold back, worrying I'll do something he won't like.

Helix is about the right size to start with, I think. I started with a Helix just over a year ago.

He is one lucky guy.