Dear all,

I thought I'd write a few thoughts down, having had an enjoyable session last night which, nonetheless, did not produce the Super 'O'. I'd like to think I'm a kind of intermediate at this now. Things are happening and I'm gradually mastering control of some of them, but I still haven't reached that orgasm yet, and every session seems to yield a new sensation which I have to familiarize myself with and try and understand. I won't bore you with talk of positions or lube – I just have a few points which might encourage those of you who are really struggling, or yield some advice from those of you who are really gunning.

To put it bluntly, it's a tricky little blighter! Suddenly I find that the Aneros has got it [I]right[/I] there, and I'm like "ooooooh that's [I]so[/I] good", but then it feels as if the Aneros has gone [I]past[/I], [I]beyond[/I] the spot, or the spot has moved away. Another thing that happens is that there can be a strong, random contraction from my penis (or something related to it) which dislodges things somehow. I'm guessing that managing to maintain this sort of contact is one of the keys. Would any of the guru's amongst you agree with that?

One of the recent revelations for me has been the number of different contractions there are, when previously I just thought it was one. Firstly, in terms of depth. Previously, it was all coming from 'low down' in my sphincter – the muscles that I'm more used to controlling. But now I find I'm starting to have a control (of sorts) over a 'higher up' contraction, which is good for moving the Aneros to the prostate. I'm not sure about this, but a good tactic seems to me to be hold the 'inner' contraction and let let the 'outer' one do the 'thrust' work. Does anybody else find this? Or find something else entirely?

It's very difficult to tell the extent to which contractions are 'involuntary'. There's a lot of advice on this forum saying "just relax". I'm sure that this has its place, but my experience in the performing arts has told me that it's not about 'just relaxing' – it's about relaxing some muscles and tensing others. If you completely relax in an Aneros session (unless in an advanced stage) nothing will happen. So there always has to be an element of control, right? Furthermore, what surprises me is that, even once you have 'invols', they can be quite bland and ineffective. You just keep slamming yourself, and unless you voluntarily do something about that (a small internal adjustment perhaps), then you don't really get anywhere. You can just let them keep happening but it doesn't 'get the spot'.

Last night I had a wonderful, new experience almost straight away, which was the Aneros moving itself in and out of me much more slowly and firmly than I'm used to. It felt like, instead of just thrusting at me, the Aneros was making [I]love[/I] to me, which was really arousing. Later, when I was on the ascent up that sacred hill (I don't think I quite reached the summit), I focussed on slightly deeper, slower strokes than usual which was very effective and a much more mentally pleasing experience. Would people say that it's better to have more measured stroking of the prostate in this way? THe other thing I've been able to achieve is a sort of shuddering hold in the prostate area, which is nice and tingly, but it needs some force and rhythm to take it further. If I get force and rhythm, however, I tend to lose the prostate again.