I am realizing that sometimes, I am putting the horse before the cart. I have a low sex drive. It could be due to my depressing teens/young adulthood or maybe I just am "wired" that way, unfortunately.
But there are things that can be done to increase libido. I want to try some of them. What I am doing now is:
- 8 Fish Oil tablets a day; EPA 425mg, DHA 325mg
- Dark Chocolate bar a day.
- Korean Gingseng Root extract tablets - 1 a day (since today): 5:1 Extract, 600mg
What else is there I can do?
Thanks
- Ejaculatory abstinence
- Maca
- Horny Goat Weed
- Love in its various manifestations (Loving oneself is a big key for me, feeling like a sexual creature, making love to myself, taking care of myself, etc...)
Be sure you are taking Panax Ginseng. I get it at Walgreen's. Take it for 6 weeks then stop for 2 weeks and then take for 6 weeks, etc. The medical evaluations I have read say it produces better results when taken that way.
Try some relaxed self touching. Run your fingertips lightly up your stomach, on the inside of your thighs, and anywhere else that feels good. This heightens my self awareness.
I personally don't get much out of pr0n. Most of what I see on the Internet is a turn off for me. I prefer to use my imagination and fantasize or recall fond memories of past girlfriends.
Talk to your doctor and have him run blood tests including testosterone level. Could be a minor physical problem or vitamin deficiency.
Just my thoughts.
Hi,
Thanks for that guys. I think they sell HGW at a Holland & Barrett near my workplace. I've heard it can work for some guys and not for others. I will give it a shot. As for Gingseng, I got Health Aid. I think I have seen Panax Gingseng before, it looks familiar. I will try it out.
Porn, since having a girlfriend, realizing how pleasureless penile stim is for me, and now because of me analysing the females pleasure compared to the man's (OCD mind), does not do much for me anymore. I remember about 2 weeks ago, I was going for a trad penile O while watching porn, but had to revert to a ...sorry this wasn't my girlfriend, any port in a storm, an exclassmate (I imagined her older than I last saw her) to get me over that "line", so to speak.
I also need some pills to help you make regular bowel movements, since, this affects when I can have an Aneros session.
Hey My Turn,
If you are taking fish oil according to The Orgasmic Diet, Zaneblue (author of the diet) recommended here in another post to avoid Horny Goat Weed since they both act as blood thinners and could be potentially dangerous in combination.
She also recommends just 1oz. of Dark Chocolate a day, and that over-doing it could off-set the results (i.e. too much serotonin from the caffeine in the chocolate off-sets the intended dopamine boost).
She also explains that it's more than just the fish oil alone. Avoiding carbs, sugars, caffeine, soy, etc are also a big part of it.
I suggest getting a copy of her book to make the best of what the diet has to offer.
As far as herbs go, I've found tons that work great for me. But it's difficult to say what effect a particular herb will have on another person, especially without knowing more about their medical history and especially what, if any, medications they are currently taking.
Some herbs work by adjusting hormone levels, others affect neurotransmitters (dopamine, serotonin, etc), others are either nervous system stimulants or depressants, and of course some affect blood pressure. All of this should considered before trying anything new.
In my experience, a good general rule to follow is to first research the herb as much as possible, find out what it does, how it does it, and what a standard dose is (don't just follow the instructions on the first bottle you see).
Before trying a new herb, stop taking any other herbs for a couple days. This way you'll have a clearer sense of what each herb does (or doesn't) do for you.
Always start of with half a dose for the first couple days just to be safe. And as has already been suggested here, it's generally a good idea to take occasional breaks from most herbs both in order to avoid developing a tolerance and to avoid any potential risks.
If I recall correctly, you were going to see a sex therapist soon? How about waiting until you spoken with them before adding more factors into the equation? If the root of your problem is physical (low dopamine/serotonin/testosterone, etc) knowing more about it's specifics would make it a lot easier to determine the best herb(s) for you. Without that knowledge, you're just popping pills at random and that rarely leads to anything positive.
Good Luck!
Pan
P.S. Re: regular bowel movements - I had similar issues. Among other things, I just eat "Yoplus" for breakfast every morning. Took a couple weeks to kick in, but I have 1-3 BM's a day. I hear "Activia" is also a good one.
I also take this occasionally when I need something a little stronger. It's gentle, but effective. http://www.swansonvitamins.com/SWU370/ItemDetail;jsessionid=0F3A1826B07AC0FE6C3C589A1472811E.node1
Of course, I recommend just talking to your doctor first.
If I recall correctly, you were going to see a sex therapist soon? How about waiting until you spoken with them before adding more factors into the equation? If the root of your problem is physical (low dopamine/serotonin/testosterone, etc) knowing more about it's specifics would make it a lot easier to determine the best herb(s) for you. Without that knowledge, you're just popping pills at random and that rarely leads to anything positive.
i agree. MyTurn, slow down.
darwin
I'd argue it's not really anything unusual. Wish I could just start bloody feeling horny on demand, but it's not as simple as just opening up the porn folder.
In the short term, before you see the therapist, you might want to try erotic literature instead of just porn. The mind's the most active sexual organ, and a picture or a video does little for the imagination. A good read, though, really, um, wakes you up.
If it is a mental barrier, there's no risks to experimenting to find a way around it yourself, and it just might work. And if it's a physical/physiological barrier, then, well, you'll just waste a little time. No real harm done.
Cilantro , which seems to be also known as Corriander is also very potent ,I have found that it takes around four to six hours to kick in for me. You can find it in most grocery stores.
Hello MyTurn, 🙂
My personal experience has been, that how I feel about myself has a lot to do with my sex drive and arousal. Making it very much a mind game. Lately, I do often look at, and read porn prior to an Aneros session, so I can start it already aroused. But when I'm in bed having the session, it is a good challenge to practice visualizing and fantasizing what makes me aroused. I find I get better at it the more I practice, notice, and observe what makes hot and bothered! 😀 If that happens to be your ex-classmate, then go for it! Use what works. No need to be ashamed about it. Everyone has sexual fantasies that aren't necessarily meant to be acted out in real life. Ask your girlfriend what she fantasizes about sexually to get her off. You might be surprised! 😆
Esfenoides post of "Love in its various manifestations (Loving oneself is a big key for me, feeling like a sexual creature, making love to myself, taking care of myself, etc...)", is very relevant in my mind. As is Anon17564's post of using erotic literature to let your imagination fill in the blanks so to speak. Both very good ideas.
At this point in time, I'm more of in the camp of, it is all mental, rather than trying to use herbs and supplements to increase sex drive and arousal. But I recognize there is a place for it all. So do what you find works for you.
Love_is
Regular exercise
Lots of good advice and notices. Thanks. I read every post. Sadly, I don't have time to reply to each individually at the moment, but I will take on board what was said. Still no reply from the sex therapist yet.
I told my girlfriend about my lack of pleasure (didn't mention low libido), and I even introduced her to the Aneros. She was supportive. I said it would take time to produce results, but she kinda thought it would immediately help me.
A little update on my life.
That's a very positive step to make. Good luck 🙂
Good for you MyTurn! 😀 😀 😀
That's a really good first step you made!!!
I'm happy you could bring yourself to discuss this with your girlfriend!
(Thank god for spell checkers... I almost called her your grilfriend... Can you imagine? I keep wanting to touch her, but I keep getting burned... 😆 )
Love_is
Avoiding carbs, caffeine
the rest of the advice is pretty good but this is bad advice for general health, which applies to this topic of increasing libido. avoiding carbs causes hormone regulation problems, and if you avoid carbs completely (such as a keto/atkins diet) you'll need to be drinking a LOT of water to make sure you flush your kidneys. i'm guessing she says to avoid soy because of the phytoestrogens in soy, but then why avoid carbs? avoiding carbs could cause a similar effect to ingesting soy. what you want is to have a good diet of 40% carbs (or more if you're athletic) 40% proteins and 20% fats. to maintain energy levels you should eat low glycemic index carbs like oats, wheat bread, and brown rice.
caffeine is also a good energy booster without causing stress hormone problems if you don't go too far. i'd say around 50~75mg of caffeine is great for boosting energy and libido without causing problems, with the exception of possibly difficulty sleeping if you are not used to taking caffeine. plus it is a slightly thermogenic chemical and fat loss helps greatly at regulating hormone levels. just being active and exercising in general has the largest effect out of anything you can do to help your libido.
basically her advice sounds great but:
keep carbs, just low GI carbs not not sugars etc.
slight caffeine is fine and beneficial
exercise is the best libido booster by far
Hey bobby45,
I totally agree with your analysis and comments.
To elaborate on my statement, it was not intended to suggest completely eliminating carbs or caffeine from one's diet, it was a general summary of the advice found in the book "The Orgasmic Diet," which I should add, also does not advocate drastic dietary changes (like Atkin's), but rather general guidelines in order to provide the reader with a basic understanding of which foods help increase dopamine and free testosterone levels and which ones increase serotonin, the idea being that striking a healthy balance of the three leads to an increased potential to experience sexual pleasure and desire.
Considering that the author recommends adding small amounts of dark chocolate to one's diet, she clearly doesn't hold a militant stance regarding caffeine, but rather a practical one. For instance, if a person's libido is flagging and they happen to be drinking several cups of coffee on a daily basis, according to her, tapering off for awhile might help lead to better results in bed. Less caffeine = less serotonin = more dopamine = more potential pleasure. Pretty basic stuff.
Her stance on carbs is similar - all things in moderation (more protein, less pasta, etc) in order to help keep serotonin levels in check.
I'm not really qualified to comment further other than to say I think her dietary advice is relatively moderate and quite reasonable. But in truth, I pretty much just take the recommended dosage of DHA and EPA supplements and eat whatever makes me feel good, including carbs. Just doing that and keeping her guidelines in mind when I shop for groceries has given me quite a lift and no problems that I'm aware of.
I have a great suggestion. Something called Young Tissue Extract, also known as Youth Tissue Extract. Also called Libido. Try Swans#n vitamins.
Hey bobby45,
I totally agree with your analysis and comments.
To elaborate on my statement, it was not intended to suggest completely eliminating carbs or caffeine from one's diet, it was a general summary of the advice found in the book "The Orgasmic Diet," which I should add, also does not advocate drastic dietary changes (like Atkin's), but rather general guidelines in order to provide the reader with a basic understanding of which foods help increase dopamine and free testosterone levels and which ones increase serotonin, the idea being that striking a healthy balance of the three leads to an increased potential to experience sexual pleasure and desire.
Considering that the author recommends adding small amounts of dark chocolate to one's diet, she clearly doesn't hold a militant stance regarding caffeine, but rather a practical one. For instance, if a person's libido is flagging and they happen to be drinking several cups of coffee on a daily basis, according to her, tapering off for awhile might help lead to better results in bed. Less caffeine = less serotonin = more dopamine = more potential pleasure. Pretty basic stuff.
Her stance on carbs is similar - all things in moderation (more protein, less pasta, etc) in order to help keep serotonin levels in check.
I'm not really qualified to comment further other than to say I think her dietary advice is relatively moderate and quite reasonable. But in truth, I pretty much just take the recommended dosage of DHA and EPA supplements and eat whatever makes me feel good, including carbs. Just doing that and keeping her guidelines in mind when I shop for groceries has given me quite a lift and no problems that I'm aware of.
yeah, I didn't mean to imply that you yourself were making these recommendations, just that there was a problem with the notion of "avoiding" carbs and caffeine. Moderation in everything is key, especially when dealing with caffeine. A lot of people have the misconception that caffeine will negatively impact your health even at low doses, and everyone is obsessed with ketogenic diets lately (due to atkins and body building trends), so I just interpreted the info incorrectly.
My two cents on caffeine moderation, is that "everything in moderation" does not apply to caffeine, as it would to carbs. Caffeine is a drug that is abused. It is not a nutrient, and thus does not bring anything good to your body. That said, it is naturally in some foods (which are eaten in unnatural, highly processed forms) such as chocolate, tea and coffee. In my opinion, it should be minimized, as it puts your body into an unnatural state.
After consuming coffee daily for 7 years, it took me three weeks to get through the withdrawl headaches, but it took three months for me to feel normal without it, i.e. to get up and feel rested in the morning and throughout the day.
I agree with what people have said about diet and exercise. Being healthy is the best thing you can do for your libido. Herbs are ok, just don't over do it.
My two cents on caffeine moderation, is that "everything in moderation" does not apply to caffeine, as it would to carbs. Caffeine is a drug that is abused. It is not a nutrient, and thus does not bring anything good to your body. That said, it is naturally in some foods (which are eaten in unnatural, highly processed forms) such as chocolate, tea and coffee. In my opinion, it should be minimized, as it puts your body into an unnatural state.
After consuming coffee daily for 7 years, it took me three weeks to get through the withdrawl headaches, but it took three months for me to feel normal without it, i.e. to get up and feel rested in the morning and throughout the day.
actually, caffeine is a thermogenic (fat burning, and energy promoting) chemical. this is definitely a "benefit" i'd say. It doesn't put your body into an "unnatural" state at all, unless you drink large amounts of it, which apparently you did if you had withdrawal headaches for weeks. All it does is trigger the conversion of fatty acids to energy. Unlike other drugs and alcohol, caffeine does not damage any part of your body in moderate doses.
You can abuse anything, including food and water. This is not a good reason to dismiss a beneficial, normally harmless chemical just because of the possibility of abuse.
In the market, there are pills, capsules, syrups, granules etc available. They all help in boosting the male libido. They are thought to have nurturing effects on the male reproductive system and its organs. You can try medicine also to increase libido.
I'm unhappy because my libido went wAAAAy down. It's not natural, I have serious confidence problems. I get good hard-ons when I'm sleepy or just woke up, or sleep deprived. Which shows it's a mental problem.
Try to lead a happy life. Identify what makes you unhappy or unfulfilled, and do something about it.
Recently I was buying aneros fuel (a.k.a. a big bottle of silicone lube) in my local sexshop, in plain day, on a busy street. Suddenly and unexpectedly for me (because I almost forgot about spontaneous erections) I got a boner while talking to the clerk lady. A matter-of-fact conversation about which lube to choose. I was shameless enough to say it was for a kegel-powered prostate massager. I also asked if they had a feather or a small brush to tease a clit - the didn't. Anyway, I was wearing loose, thin pants and the erection was blatantly visible, not that the lady cared, she must have seen hundreds of them working in a sex shop. But it was a pleasant surprise for me. I want MORE.
Spend time around attractive women... or men if you're gay. I can tell you that all I need to do is see attractive women in person, and I can literally feel my body wake up sexually. Combine this with edging (penile stimulation nearing the point of ejaculation without ejaculation), and avoiding an orgasm for a week or so and you should find your sexual energy going through the roof.