The Car and the Balloon: a helpful metaphor

This post is especially for initiates and anyone else who hasn’t reached the heights you expected to. It’s a metaphor that I use for mental imaging during sessions, and it brings me real contentment. But first, a little unpacking.

If you’re new to Aneros, you’re probably wondering how shoving a little plastic whatsit into your southern hemisphere can bring you tidal waves of orgasmic bliss. Or maybe you’ve been at this a while but haven’t had the amazing results that others crow about, and it’s frustrating. To hell with a “journey,” I want my special mega-orgasm now, right? I know. That used to be me.

Trouble is, we dudes are hardwired to conflate sexual pleasure with ejaculation. There’s a climax to getting hot and bothered. That’s the riddle of prostate play: there isn’t a definitive end or destination. Even guys who experience deep prostate pleasure aren’t always sure what to call it; are buzzy waves of warmth orgasms? Do orgasms come from our genitals? Are they contingent upon our mental state? And men who ejaculate during prostate play experience it tangentially, like a side effect…so is that a true prostate orgasm? (Read the wiki about the difference between ejaculation and orgasm—they’re not synonymous. And consider: this forum helps us explore our deeper physiological and emotional pleasure triggers…but we never need to figure out how to masturbate, right? I.e., prostate stimulation and response aren’t simple, quantifiable things; this stuff has a steep learning curve.)

And a man’s biological imperative isn’t prostate stimulation. We were created for—and by—penile stimulation. Mother Nature commands us to get boners and screw and ejaculate and make more people, an event in which our prostates barely get the bronze. Yet our prostates offer fringe benefits that even Big Mama may have overlooked. She isn’t a man, after all.

Anyway, this metaphor popped into my head a while back, and it’s brought me real peace of mind. Even though I haven’t experienced the seismic events that others report, it doesn’t bother me anymore. I’ve stopped worrying, comparing, or fretting about my sessions. I truly enjoy them now, in part because of this visual. I hope it helps you do the same.

***

Traditional masturbation is driving a car, and prostate play is riding in a hot air balloon.

In a car, we drive from point to point on a specific road. It’s linear. We map it. That’s probably why men appreciate cars so much—they’re like us, strong and fast and good at getting from A to B. That’s traditional masturbation: arousal, stimulation, ejaculation. It’s easy and enjoyable and predictable. It always delivers what it’s supposed to. We can load the car with whatever we want, and it’ll always, always get us there. We control where we go, how fast we go, and which way we go. That’s the key—we’re always in control.

But in a car, we don’t see past the immediate horizon. We see only two dimensions outside the windows, and things are a blur as we speed by. And like masturbation, there’s no room for nuance and reflection while we hammer away at our Johnsons.* In fact, introspection is an impediment to erections; philosophy and meditation are dick deflaters. Gimme some porn and ten minutes alone, and I’ll give you my family tree.

*What do you need that for, dude?

A balloon, however, is so unlike a car that they have literally no similarities. You can provision a car with whatever you want; with a balloon, you can only bring what’s necessary or it won’t fly. What you do bring is for sustenance and sightseeing, nothing more. There’s no onboard entertainment, no single area of focus when you’re in a basket in the sky. In the car, you have to pay singular attention to the road and the route. In a balloon, that’s impossible. In a car, you concentrate on what’s immediately in front of you. In a balloon, your focus is everywhere. You see multiple horizons, hidden lakes and valleys, undiscovered mountains and fields. There’s no destination—only up and elsewhere. The point of traveling in a balloon is exactly that, traveling in a balloon.

And you’re never in control. You can’t control where or how fast you’re going, only taking off and landing. You’re not even a pilot. Control belongs to the wind. It carries you where it will, and it’s totally futile to resist it. Ballooning means not knowing or even caring where you’re going, only that it’s beautiful and fascinating. Cars will zoom by far below you, en route to their specific destinations. You drift along without one. Your entire trip is for sightseeing and exploration, finding new perspective. There isn’t a journey; there’s only the experience of the immediate present. Flying mandates actually letting go in order to rise higher.

Every car trip is the same, A to B. The destinations and scenery differ, but we always see things the same way. Each balloon trip is unique. Every scene changes, no two winds blow the same way or speed. Some balloon trips are breathtaking, some are cloudy and dull.

Still with me? When I have a session with Aneros or otherwise, I’ve stopped thinking about getting from A to B. I think about getting into a balloon. I don’t think of prostate play as a journey or quest anymore, because that connotes a finish line, a two dimensional groundview.

So here are my takeaways:
1. Cut your expectations loose. They’re ballast. Releasing them doesn’t guarantee a thrilling balloon ride, but clinging to them does guarantee a day on the ground. You only get frustrated when you expect something.

2. Don’t confuse masturbation with prostate stimulation. One’s sexual, the other is sensual. There’s certainly overlap, but keep these distinctions clear, at least in your mind, and you’ll enjoy each activity more. Don’t get into a balloon if you want immediate gratification, and don’t get into a car if you want to float in sensual communion with yourself. Imagine getting pissed off in a balloon because it isn’t going fast enough or taking you to a specific place.

3. Simplify. For the balloon ride/prostate play, bring only what’s essential. Meditation, music, nipple play—whatever gets you off the ground. But don’t load your basket with comparisons or directions (i.e., stressing about the ‘right’ Aneros, positions, techniques, etc.) These are heavy. So too is patience; it means you’re waiting for something. Don’t be patient. Don’t wait. Enjoy the immediate sights and pleasures. Don’t ignore something lovely because you’re waiting to see something spectacular…you wouldn’t float above the cloudline, see the full moon, and say, ‘damned thing’s too bright. I can’t see the stars.’

4. You can’t control prostate response the way you can control masturbation. The sooner you embrace this, the more pleasurable your sessions will be. Again, realizing you’re not in control doesn’t guarantee any particular response, but trying to control things will hinder responses, whatever yours may be.

5. The point of prostate play is to explore. Don’t expect to find anything—be an explorer. Take in the new sights, thoughts, and horizons. Thrill at what you discover. Ballooning is only a waste of time if you bring a treasure map with you.

Roadblocks only exist on roads.

Best of Pleasures,
Z