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09/29/2018 7:03 pm
@McRhombus and all the other men who are wondering how to recapture that elusive prostate firefly-
I empathize. Sessions always feel great; even when they're ho-hum they still bring warmth and contentment. However, I had a few mind-bending sessions a couple of months ago that are still the high-water mark. As I still bob along below it, I have a couple of thoughts about what happened, why, and what's next.
I had a few free days to myself, and got really, really naughty for the duration. I had very long sessions, played music, wore G-strings and stockings, gave myself full body oil massages, toyed with vibrators, and looked at lots of porn without masturbating- only for arousal. Well, after being up in the wee hours with all of my Aneri, and doing some very hard contractions and Kegels, I felt myself getting closer and closer to something I hadn't ever felt, a feeling of all-consuming orgasmic momentum building in my entire PC area. It was exhausting, though, and I finally went to sleep after probably six hours of intense play. I usually embrace the do-nothing approach; this was the do-everything.
Smash cut to the next day, and I was driving along, wearing a ball lifter under my shorts (if you don't know, it's an elastic thing that goes around your waist and under your scrotum- I quite like the feeling, and highly recommend them.) I was a bit weary for lost sleep, then without warning my entire PC area started heating up. Warmth turned to fire, and the pleasure was so intense I had to pull over. Again, a delicious orgasmic spasm that defied description pulsed through me, this time stronger and more pronounced. After a few minutes it subsided, and I went shopping. And while shopping, my prostate pulsed and squealed again, to my secret pleasure and alarm. Attention shoppers, aisle 12 is open for lying on the floor writhing in ecstasy, and avocados are two for a dollar.
In the day that followed, I was in a heightened state. It didn't matter much what I did; the pleasure was very accessible, like when you go fishing and it's wide open. I think it had a lot to do with my attitude- once you do something, doing it again isn't such a mind-fuck. Through all of this, though, I never went 'over the edge,' i.e. didn't have what I'd call a definitive prostate orgasm that actually ended. It was more of a prolonged wonder-wave, that incredible tue-curling sensation in the second before an orgasm, but it just maintained a holding pattern. I kept thinking I was going to explode, but I didn't truly climax. Regardless, it was like tasting sugar if you'd never had it before, and I almost cried when I had to change back from Superman to Clark. Penile orgasms are, well, penile orgasms, and hurrah for them as always, but this was about three levels of bliss beyond. I posit that it came from all the extended play, that my prostate was totally fatigued and spasming after so much stimulation. That, and the fact that I had no expectations. Since then, I've only had fleeting brushes with this sensation, and none anywhere near the intensity. I've tried the super-clench approach, vibrators, different toys, etc., but I haven't replicated it.
I didn't say can't, though.
So here's what I'm advocating for myself and anyone else who's having trouble locating their new sex muse:
1. Periodize. In weightlifting (and anything, really) progress plateaus after a certain time within any structured activity. So if a dude's doing three sets of eight curls, three times a week, the gains will fade after a while. That means it's time to change, and make the curve shoot up again. Heavier weights with more rest, lighter weights with lest rest, some running or circuits, high-intensity intervals, and the body springs back into action. I think our man-parts respond like this too. Doing the same thing over and over dulls response and arousal...married guys, I'm coming across loud and clear, right? We have to spice things up, else we fall into patterns of obligatory bed-sex.
2. Try cycling in things you haven't done before, or much: different toys, positions, lubes, vibrators, stimuli, times of day, lengths of session, frequencies, Kegels, massage, you name it. Our forum is full of creative pleasure seekers. Read and experiement. Something's gonna help you get your mojo back. But even here, it's not like your mojo's gone- it's just ebbing. Don't sabotage your pleasure by expecting that muse to show up when you summon her. Explore new sensual pleasures, and get back in touch with the simple reality of how good it feels to be a man with an Aneros up his ass.
3. Don't worry. Enjoy sessions for their quiet, meditative, physical feedback. That stuff is the cake. Whatever else happens is frosting.
Re. strategies, I have a couple of current favorites: I've been doing deep (but gentle) abdominal massage when I lie on my back during sessions. I use thumbs or fingers to prod and roll at the soft real estate right above my pubic bone in front. Press down and rub as far as you can without discomfort while your toy is in, and you'll dicover some womderful contractions and sensations. That's because you're compressing the bladder and prostate from the other side as well. It's a nifty technique.
Another that's an absolute must-try: Take an Aneros bath. Run a nice hot tub with your favorite fragrance or oil, put on little music, grab a drink, and luxuriate with a soak and your favorite Aneri. I even wear sheer underwear or a G-string- try a woman's sheer bodystocking or teddy too. It's highly arousing. Shea butter is the go-to underwater, because it lasts, and the toys move and dance while your body relaxes and accommodates. A little almond oil and some nipple massage is a must. I've had a few Aneros baths lately, and afterwards I don't care about anything. My whole body hums and buzzes with satisfaction. Muscles and skin feel great, and my prostate squirms its thanks the rest of the day or night.
Here's hoping you all find that firefly, gents. Or more accurately, that it finds you.
Best of pleasures,
Z
10/18/2018 4:26 pm
Wow @Zenopause
Thanks for posting this. Simply put, you made love to your body for several hours and all that love rebounded to you exponentially.
Your post is one I want to return to establish a mindset for success with the aneros.
What other "bones" do you have to throw us underlings still in search of the holy grail?
10/18/2018 10:53 pm
@Zenopause - I agree with the "mix it up" concept. This is my list of stuff: Thongs/panties (the wilder the better), Cock Cages (metal, plastic, rubber), Cock rings (rubber, string), Urethral Sounds (metal, rubber), Shibari / Bondage, leather bondage, Cock Bondage (Rope and/or Hardware), eStim (external, internal), massage, edging, kegels, visualizing, nipple stim, nipple magnets, dildo, various audio, erotic writing, erotic drawing, browsing bondage pics (my fav), Aneros, meditation, fantasizing, dream control, prayer, triggering Aless, hot showers, hot tea, flirting with wife, semen retention, semen non-retention (quite skilled at that lol) .... whew!
Topic starter
10/20/2018 7:59 pm
Get thee to a nunnery! Quick, everyone over to Hereby's house! Hey mate, do you feel like posting a little 'favorite equipment' list, with brands, types, websites, etc? I know nothing about half of those...although I'd caution users about urethral sounding- it is an invitation for infections and other urethral problems, and urologists et. al in the med community sound a resounding no to sounding. Just a heads up.
Making love to my body, absolutely! Well said. This ain't masturbation. Masturbation is much more local, while Aneros sessions are more global. I guess it's like the difference between burning rubber or putting a truck in low gear- one's flashier but ephemeral, while the other pulls more weight, builds slowly, and has way more carrying capacity. The problem is that we load up the truck and try to burn rubber. We shouldn't confuse masturbation with Aneros sessions, because they're just too dissimilar.
Bones to throw...gosh, a bit of the blind leading the blind, but I'll tell you what usually feels best to me:
1. I love a ring around the base of my penis and scrotum. Those rubber wristbands that you get at every charity event are the right size for me. It makes the skin around my wedding tackle more taught, which arouses me and amplifies sensations. Also, I like the feeling of stretching my abdominal muscles when I lie prone; it increases the pressure in your whole PC area, and gives your insides a sensual squeeze.
2. Shave. Getting rid of hair around your penis, scrotum, and asshole feels wonderful (and it's great for sex, too- I feel my wife way better when I'm shorn.) There are caveats, if you haven't done this. Look around online for dos and don'ts, because you don't want nicks, rashes, etc, and they're easy to get. A very sharp, clean razor, a very warmed-up, moist area, great thin shaving gel or cream, a mirror, and careful, limited passes are the ticket. Done right, the sensations down south are also amplified. Hair growing back can be irritating, so I often just shave again.
3. During a session, I always adjust positions, rotisserie-style. I like sides and stomach as well as back, and move frequently. I particularly like lying on my stomach, and pushing my package all the way under me, penis and balls, with penis pointing towards my feet. Sometimes I hold my entire package and push down for a while. Remember in Silence of the Lambs, where Buffalo Bill had his things tucked behind him? That actually feels pretty good, if you don't stretch too far.
4. Shea Butter is incredibly emollient and responsive. It also lasts indefinitely- I've never needed to reapply it. If you haven't tried it, it's the best. Get a tub of organic, and give it a moment to warm up wherever you put or insert it. It also feels great on your nipples.
5. Ah, nipples. I've come to truly embrace nipple play as an important erogenous tactic, but I don't simply diddle them, I caress, rotate, tap, whatever. Also, there's a strange tangent to it- breathe and relax, and imagine that your nipples are actually something you masturbate with, just like your pecker. It helps to stroke your penis occasionally while caressing your nipples- it confuses the nipples into thinking they're supposed to get you off, sort of. I'm still experimenting with this, but it helps. The heavies around here call this re-wiring, but that connotes permanent changes. I think nipple play just foments new erotic responses.
6. Localize penis play. By this I mean randomly touch, stroke, push, squeeze, and tap the head of your penis. Don't masturbate- fondle and caress, very briefly. Oftentimes, done sporadically, it starts to generate some auto contractions and flutter of my anus and prostate.
7. Kegels. Do a search on the board, but @BigGlansDC has lots of useful tips and strategies that really do accelerate response and build stamina. They're fun and easy, and I always do them when I have a toy inside.
7. I'm not kidding about trying a bath. Besides all the warmth and sensuality, there's a deeper benefit: I love a good cigar, not just because it's awesome, but because smoking one means I have the time and indulgence to do it- I'm having my aaah time, with nothing else. With an Aneros bath, it's the same- pure aaah time, nothing else, as long as you want it. It brings an emotional stillness I think is lacking in most of our lives.
8. Meditate. Most who don't meditate think it means having a mantra and being uncomfortable. Baloney. It means taking a few minutes to breathe, relax, and throw away the pictures that accumulate throughout our days. The dick who cut me off this morning? Throw the image away. Yesterday's shitty meeting? Poof! That sort of thing, even for 5-10 minutes, a few times a week, does wonders to your connections of mind and body. You said mindfulness- my very first sip of coffee in the morning is something I meditate over, smelling, feeling the rim of the cup, inhaling the moisture and aroma, and rolling it around on my tongue. I think Aneros success requires the same thing: presence in the moment, true mindfulness.
I haven't really had an O of any sort, but I don't let that discourage or distract me. I get so much sensual pleasure from sessions that I always look forward to them, always ache a little to set aside some special time. That's my definition of Aneros success: it makes me feel good. Simple pleasure is way more important than all the other pie-in-the-sky stuff. Smelling the flowers, that sort of thing.
The Holy Grail's just a cup- people make it holy. So make your sessions holy. You already have, if you ask me.
Best of pleasures.
Z
10/21/2018 9:49 am
great post Zenopause... you and I think a lot alike. When you have the luxury of time and isolation, it's a wonderful thing to make love to yourself. I often make an enema part of this practice. I don't often have this opportunity, but when I do it is always a special session. Taking your time and enjoying whatever you get is the key for many. Orgasms will come eventually
10/21/2018 5:29 pm
@Zenopause - I will echo the warning about urethral sounding. I do it, yes and rarely, but it HAS bitten me on the ass despite precautions (alcohol bath for implements, sterile surgical lube packets, iodine wipe beforehand, etc.) - I don't advocate it, but it's such a mind-f*#k that I have to do it from time to time - but yeah, don't do the vice unless your prepaired to pay the price!
When I have more time to post (heading out the door right now) I'll try to elaborate on equipment, brands etc. for some of the more safer things I get into!
oh also, yes 100% full support on shaving! Can't be beat for sensitivity and mental arousal... and I've found an inexpensive way to do it without a razor... I use hair removal cream - avoids all the nasty ness, nicks, ingrown hairs (red bumps) you can hit with razors... takes repeated application for a few days... if interested I can post more details (brands, methods, do's and don'ts). But hairless or nearly so is awesome in my book.
Topic starter
10/22/2018 1:17 am
Oooh, yes please, post all these sundries! Isn't hair remover full of nasty chemicals, though? Still, sounds really cool. Looking forward to your post.
Cheers, Z
11/02/2018 8:15 pm
@Zenopause, I salute you in your large, exhaustive posts on getting the getting the buzz back!
11/02/2018 10:32 pm
I've tried sounding but I'm worried I could break my prostate.
Topic starter
11/03/2018 9:27 pm
I can't vouch for sounding, as I haven't tried it. However, after reading (something I do voraciously), it's one of the few things I permanently crossed off my naughty list. Based on almost every medical source I found, sounding is too risky. It comes with a high probabilty of infection, and introducing any foreign items or bacteria will adversely affect the urethra, and bladder infections for men are nasty business. To me, the questionable pleasure of sounding is far outweighed by the possibly serious negative consequences.
That said, we're technically not supposed to put things in our rectums, either, but here we are...although if we're smart about cleaning our toys and washing our hands, asses are way safer to explore than urethras. Leave internal weiner play to the urologists, I say.
Best of pleasures.
Z
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