My journey-gctid10048

Another rubbish session.
Felt the need to pee. And some sensation like someone was taking a fork and jabbing it into the tip of my penis and masing it up into many pieces.

And then just faded away and kept needing to pee.
I think all my sessions in the past were also dud because I just need to pee apparently.

Rode a bit last night while reading a book. First time in 2 weeks. Used the Eupho Syn.
No pleasure feelings, just a bit of need to pee.
Beginning to doubt things.

Helix Syn last night. No change other than some involuntary contractions.
Didn't feel pleasurable.

About time I post something here.

I bought the Peridise, first use was good, subsequent use wasnt.
Bought the MGX a couple of weeks ago. First use was weird, subsequent uses not good. Used it for maybe 5 days.

Then went back to Helix Syn... and was much better.
In the days following getting back to the Helix after the brief time with MGX, I've experienced gentle involuntary contractions, and it feels good (mentally, not phyisically) to be having them.
So I've been using just the Helix for the last couple of weeks and seems to be getting slowly better.

Last night, I was in bed, kinda sideways but also on my stomach a bit, helix inside me, trying to relax and drift to sleep, and then I notice that I'm getting some buzzing and gentle vibrations, and sortof need to pee feelings but they are not like the bad feelings of the past.
It seems to be better if I gently contract PC muscles and hold it like that, not a strong contraction.
And I don't know it kinda just felt more enveloping and buzzing and felt a little bit like my cock was getting slightly hard, and had some of the "sparkles" on my cock and felt kinda good.

I don't know completely what it was but it was good.

I wonder if the MGX has somehow "unlocked" something inside me. Early days still but I hope it gets better and better.

Bleh. Nearly 6 months later, nothing happening. So dissapointed.

If it's any help... my sessions seem to change over time. Like one month the Maximus might be performing amazingly, and I'll be tuned in to one kind of sensation... then the next month, it might be another model with a different kind of pleasure happening. I think it's possible to develop subtle expectations about how a session should progress, and what feelings I should be experiencing. So I anticipate those sensations, when really they're not on the menu this time. The expected feelings don't happen, and the temptation is to create them. Meanwhile I'm not listening to what other new thing might be available.
This is what happens for me anyway... if I hit a slump, it's time to go back to basics... forget all the progress I think I've earned, and go back to learning mode. Maybe add a new twist, like focusing entirely on anal pleasure or nipple stimulation. I think it's important to keep things fresh and interesting, and never letting it become something routine and predictable.
I've been through some long progress plateaus over the years, and I think one of the greatest traps is thinking you know what an aneros session is. Like I'll have in my memory the best session I've ever had... and every session will be me chasing that ideal session. Wanting the feelings to happen just as I remember them. But there's room for equally good (or better) sensations, that can be reached by going down other paths. Paths that may develop differently than what you've experienced before. That's why I think it's important to throw it open once in a while, and say "anything goes".

Bleh. Nearly 6 months later, nothing happening. So dissapointed.

I know how you feel, really i do. This year marks my 11th year trying with the aneros. 11 years.

Only in the last 1-1.5 years have had ANY progress at all, miniscule it was at first as well.

A few months back i found a way to have sessions that worked every time, but it required i buy pretty much all the aneros devices and try every position out multiple times to find one that worked and ultimately i did.

So the device that unlocked the cycle of failed sessions? the aneros tempo. This device has many users saying how useless it is, weird huh.

The position that worked? lying on my front. Lying on my back, is and probably always will be, totally effing useless.

The biggest issue i have now isnt device or position, its a lack of libido. No porn gets me off, its all boring, fake rubbish. Sometimes i see sex as just a biological function (which it is) but dont associate any kind of arousal with the act whatsoever, so certain activities durong an act made me feel sick! dont get wtf is wrong with me here, its bizarre.

When i do feel arousal it is rare and it takes WEEKS and IF i ejacualte then the whole process fails and its reset for WEEKS again. It only elicits anger out of me now.

Each time i hear of a success story or how easy its been, or how 'long my journey has been of only 2-3 years' i want to sh!t with rage. Wish those kinds of people would just shut up!

This is the truth to my sessions though; when i do have some feeling, i dont get a super o, never had one, i often feel that ejacualting is far, far more intense and satisfying. A super T for example is incredible, but they again are rarer than all heck.

Early this morning. Maybe something. Unsure. Peridise. Need to pee but weird. Kinda like a heavy ball in my abdomen. Some coughing motions with my abdominal muscles. Neck and head felt like they were stretching away from my torso, and then later squashed back to torso. But I was in bed trying to sleep, so could have been a dream.

Confused.

Another update.

Yesterday late evening, I insert Eupho Syn. Nothing happens for a good 2 hours.

Then I get ready for sleep and insert Helix Syn, get in bed switch lights off etc and just try to fall asleep.

During this time, I keep getting quite a lot of small involuntary anal twitches. I just relax and Do Nothing. Out of instinct, I tend to clench a bit when this happens but I try to fight it off and just relax the PC muscles so that I am not clenching.

This goes on for a while.

Then I get this weird need to pee feeling but it's different to the two other types of such feeling I've had in the past.

This one seems more familiar as the type that I get shortly before having a traditional orgasm. It doesn't last long, maybe 10 seconds?
Doesn't happen again. Get a few more involuntary contractions but not as many.

Dunno what this was. Maybe my first actual P-wave?
I think this was definitely more towards the pleasure part of the spectrum. Seems like progress.

It does sound like progress. You might find too, that as you experience that new feeling more often you get more in tune with it, and it comes back more easily. Maybe next time it'll last 20 seconds or come back a second time... and when you get comfortable enough with it, it might be a constant sensation that stays through your whole session. I think it's good to dive into those weird feelings and see where they lead, and I think it's easier to concentrate on them when you learn to (on some level) filter out the (purely kinetic) sensations of muscle activity.

I know what you mean about the instinctual feeling of needing to clench (points at username), and it's worth relaxing through that stuff (at least as an experiment). I find so much of this is about working against your own instincts. The urge to clench, tighten, grab on, push or chase sensations. It's all weird, upside-down rules that you don't even know are in effect until you discover them.

In case anyone is following this....

Its 1:30 am. I am in bed. Was trying to sleep. No aneros tonight. Just wearing my sexy double layer satin panties with satin pillow cover stuffed in yhere too.

Just breathing yryong to sleep.

Then felt like pins and needles or scrsping or tingle in groin. Then a bit like need to pee and then my groin and abs area started feeling like its aĺl made of cardboard woth not much freling like heavyness but also light. Weird. Beed to per sorta came in wavrs and also felt weird tongle behind my knees and a couple of times butterflies. Then i shofted my position thinking i really need to sleep when i felt like pain in top of my head crown area.

No idea ehat this means.
Arghhhh must sleep.

Almost a year since my last post.
If anyone cares:
Last night, helix syn. Had tempo in for maybe 20 mins before.
Cock wrapped in satin but no movement so doubt it had an effect.
Felt something, but I cant explain it because I cant remember it.

It was like an itch or need to pee feeling that lasted for maybe 30 seconds to a minute, dissapeared and then appeared again.
Pressure / tightness / expanding feeling in the groin and near where prostate should be.
Possible pleasure too.
Vibrations but cant remember if night before or even if it was just with the tempo and not with the Helix.

I am terrible at explaining these things.

I'm well into my 3rd year now.

Last couple of weeks have seen me notice some changes.

I cannot put it into words very well, as I am poor at doing so.

Nothing earth-shattering, but interesting.

However noticing some strange feelings:
- sometimes get need-to-pee, but they are not constant; I'd be reluctant to say that it comes in waves, but it kind of does.
- if I hold the Helix in one place with no movements (so not quite Do Nothing, I am constantly tensing muscles to keep it in place) sometimes (well, at least 5 times in the last couple of weeks) causes some sort of shudder in the groin area (don't know exactly where).
- sometimes applying more PC muscle pressure to press towards where prostate should be, and then apply small rhythmic contractions causes feelings like more intense need to pee that doesnt last long / some sort of tickle in balls
- twice now, had some sort of more intense and short lived need to pee feelings that almost felt like they originated in the balls or near where the balls join near my penis base, kinda felt like a pinch or pressure, and then sorta shot towards my bladder feeling like an itch.

Some of this may have been helped by me using Pro Ice after a very long break of using the Pro.

Another interesting thing... this morning I was in bed, being lazy (should get up and get to work), and was sorta daydreaming / snoozing that I was "going down" on a lady at work, and I woke up with slight feel that's either need to pee or on the begining path to orgasm. That was interesting. And I think that maybe me dreaming of using my tongue on her was actually me using my tongue slightly in bed (ChuckJo2000's thing with tongue movement linked to prostate???) or maybe my PC muscles slightly.

Had Helix Trident in my rear for a few hours while sitting down at the computer and studying, listening to music.
Went to bed to sleep without removing it. At some point in time, I felt usual stuff... then at one point I had this sudden and very intense need to pee feeling that hit me like some sort of jolt. Then it quickly faded away and didnt appear again. Was interesting! Progress I suspect.

Erm. 2 hours last night of Helix Trident, sitting down and studying. Was getting it to move over a small area inside me which caused me to have pee feelings and felt like i was scraping over something. Weird feeling.

Went to bed, still with the trident inside.
As I was trying to drift to sleep, my abdomen and area between my belly button and penis was like... vibrating or rather... it was fluttering. It was soooo weird lol
I think more progress. Anyone had this before?

Thanks for keeping us updated. I like to hear about others journeys.

Hmm last night, put Helix Trident in, and then went to bed.
As I was falling asleep, I was on my left side, with my right knee on the bed and my left leg stretched out... and the Helix was pressing on some spot and as I was falling asleep I was moving it using very tiny movements of the PC muscles, and I ended with some quite intense need to pee feelings that were quite nice.

After a while of this though I felt a bit sore and fell asleep. The progress continues...

Been a while since my last.

Maximus Trident had been purchased.

Yesterday evening I had taken a short nap with the Helix Trident, felt the usual need to pee feelings that indicate not having a full bladder, and then a new sensation - butterflies in the stomach.

Was nice! Reading forum posts this would be a p-wave?

@lonewolf8  , probably a p-wave yes.  Now you can build on that.

It's nice to read about your experiences again.

Posted by: @ggringo

@lonewolf8  , probably a p-wave yes.  Now you can build on that.

It's nice to read about your experiences again.

That's reassuring then, and looking towards getting the same feeling again.

Never seen you in chat, but good to see you here.

@lonewolf8  , I used to spend some time in Chat but I'm not a quick typist and I get frustrated trying to write what I want to say.  It usually comes out wrong or I massacre the spelling of words.  Safer here for me.