Make love to yourself?

You are 100% correct!

TG

I think there is a lot to be said about this I feel that after we get over the main goal to have an orgasm we begin to enjoy the real pleasures.I also have begin to enjoy the different phases of each session to relax and give your self up,as a male we have a history in making love as being the active one,this is something that we have to change during our sessions.

What a remarkable thread. Yes it would be brilliant To actually love your body, look after it and enjoy its company. It is the closest earthly friend we ever have. What an opportunity for a real intimate relationship. Just think of the magic when two people who love their bodies get together the borderline between each would disappears and the celebration would blur self to self, self to other, other to self. But yes I want to love my body, I am beginning to make it nice. I cut back some of the scrub yesterday, it looks good. Hurray for Aneros. It is an amazing facilitator. It think it is because it aids in releasing deep seated joy and is not just focused on sexual release.
To love ones body would release a sexual energy that is profound, life affirming, healing, bringing our warring part together into a wholeness. I must stop hear my mind is running away from me, by body is clicking its heels ...... About time!

Great Thread, ineverknew.
For the last five years or so I have tried to do just that with the big M, stroking, edging, and savoring the wonderful feelings in my body to up my libido and overcome the effects of aging. I even called it making love to my body in my mind.
I am glad to see your thread on this subject with the aneros. Although I am only in the training wheel stages, relaxing and savoring the feelings, making love to myself focusing mentally have given me the most results in this rewiring, non penis journey.

@ineverknew And now you begin to see what only the rewired experienced of us see! Well done, now you begin to understand why all us experienced guys can say is "sit back and enjoy the ride"," Let go LUKE let the force (aneros) guide you" (starwars)It only makes sense once you get a sniff of it correct?

I am not sure where I heard this but it rings true to "Making love to yourself"

MOVEMENT IF LIFE.
Movement creates pleasure. Yes movement is mechanical like you said but that is just the driving force.
We are designed for pleasure from movement inside and out.
Just swallowing food causes pleasure if you think about it. Your gullet moves to pull the food down to your stomach. It does actually feel good unless it is too hot and then it feels BAD real Bad.

This brings forth the age old question "is being a vegetable in a hospital bed living" ?
I would rather be dead but you could argue that your heart is moving and your lungs are too, even if they are being forced to.
If its not doing it by its own then????????

Movement, the feeling of movement enjoy it before its gone.

You are 100% right. I have a year of aneros experience under my belt now and I now knows what it feels to bring self love to ones self. I can rub my belly or just rub my chest or my inner thighs and get so hot and bothered but in a good way. I actually can say i make love to my self every night.

If you really want to run with this...

Get out some oil, maybe olive oil, stand in front of a mirror naked, maybe with candlelight, and use the oil to make your body a little slick. Now start making love to your whole sensuous body with your slippery hands. Your hands are those of a partner, or yourself, who is discovering the beauty of your body, appreciating it, and getting turned on by arousing you this way.

Another component to this is to allow yourself to envision your whole pectoral region as an extended part of your nipple, like a male breast that needs loving similar to that of a woman.

Finally, once really aroused, wipe off excess oil and hop into bed for your session.

Darwin

GREAT perception, ineverknew. I agree. This is a whole different ball game in a million ways. I think you hit on one of the wonderful distinctives of the Aneros journey.

Love the awakening this process gives us all - including the paradigm shift of looking and and experience things in such different and exciting ways!

brine

I wonder if you have to actually wine and dine your own body, get it in the mood, make love to it just like you would your significant other. Let me know what you guys think about this theory. Thanks in advance.
This is genius! (period, exclamation mark, light bulb and all)
You are definitely onto something.

I managed to do it only for a few brief instants but it sure struck home.
You brilliantly put it with the title : "make love to yourself"
Kind of hard to make sense of it maybe.
But be simple. Give love.
It changes everything...

I had been wrong earlier in my journey by trying to fuuck myself... How limited, ugly, tensed and stupid that was!... Loving and mating is so much more.

Great responses so far guys. I guess this does kinda make sense in a way. Now the hard part, how to achieve this. I've come close a few times, maybe it just takes time.

Your best sex organ and the largest is your brain.Use it to create a scene that makes you want sex.Focus on your prostate,not your penis.Contact with other body parts is good,leave the cock alone. This has worked well for me,take your time and go slow.Try different positions,you can't tell what will trigger the big one

@aneros_user54626 Your best sex organ and the largest is your brain.Use it to create a scene that makes you want sex.

Well said !

Deleted by author

AneRico -

There is so much to agree with in your statement!

A healthy individual, one who loves him/herself, is the best guarantee of a healthy relationship.

I am so grateful for my Aneros journey and how it has augmented my self-love. As a result, all of my relationships have improved.

Brine

@Anerico, deep stuff for sure, thanks for your reply. This is definitely giving me some stuff to think about and work on since I have never thought of it in this way.

@AneRico,This is what Tantric practice is all about.

Any description of Tantric love is replete with expressions like the ones you have listed; honouring, cherishing, respecting etc.

Have you by any chance, dabbled in Tantric lovemaking?

@Anerico, deep stuff for sure, thanks for your reply. This is definitely giving me some stuff to think about and work on since I have never thought of it in this way.

Funny... Cause you wrote it yourself. Only you couldn't read it as clearly.

Deleted by author

I've been following this thread since it was started however I never felt the urge to comment. That changed today. So far I have agreed with everything said thus far. Now not to hijack the thread or change topic I'd like to add another dynamic if I may, which may make a few things more clear to those who will read this in the future.

The reason the this thread caught my eye was 1 it was started by @ineverknew he's a great guy, so I was interested in it for that reason and 2 the title struck me as love making always sounds good to a woman...but the idea of a man making love to himself...even better in my opinion 3 it enabled me to reference it to 2 other guys who i feel just really needs to take their time with themselves. So as I kept up with it in my mind i thought maybe men are FINALLY getting it!!!

I think the art of love making is one that it usually takes men a while to get the hang of. I should be more clear and say making love to another person (in my experience a woman). Ever wonder why women LOVE foreplay, love for you to take it slow and cherish us??? I think you guys that try this method out for yourselves find that it heightens the pleasure and enjoyment. It is the same for women...thus proving that men and women are not really that different in a lot of ways.

Now to add to what @AneRico said, lots of times women just want to be sensually made love to because we feel in the moment that the man is into us even maybe in love with us. That we are beautiful and can conquer the world...thus it boosts our self love. Now...let me say this because SOMEBODY will read this and think I"m suggesting that women find their self love in a man or sex...thats NOT what I'm saying as I DO NOT believe in that crap...I think self love should come from within FIRST. However, with that being cleared up, I honestly feel that a woman who is well loved (emotionally and physically) by herself and her partner does have a certain "glow" that i dont notice in other women who are not.

So I'm saying all that to say, great work guys, let the lessons here carry into the rest of your lives. I truly think this concept of love will better the world, but a select few have to start by putting that love out into the world. I honestly think the gems found here have and will continue to spur on a revolution of some sort...

@devajones,Agree absolutely!

Thank you so much for stating the woman's perspective. We really need more people like you in this forum.

@Pommie thanks so much for your beautiful compliment, I really appreciate it.

I mentioned in chat that I didnt really convey what I mean. I'm a night owl, and now that it is well into the morning my mind is able to wrap more clearly around what I was trying to say.

Yes women love to be loved on, and how it makes us feel GREAT. I think the same is true for men (lets be honest what man doenst like to have somebody lavishing their attention and affection on him??? really only the self conscious have a problem with this), and it is very vital for a man to love himself as well. Now if that starts as physically by making love to himeself and it carries over into other aspects of his life I think he is better for it.

I honestly feel that if guys take time to just enjoy themselves instead of just jerking madly until all the skin falls off their penis (its a joke ok, dont be so uptight whoever you are reading this and getting hot around the collar), they would truly see and feel how sexy they are. With that comes confidence and self worth. When those come into play one's life takes off in a very major way. Relationships with others are better (or the bad people in your life get lost...which that is a plus too, i know that from experience), life feels better, you project what want effortlessly with out shame or ill ease etc. Its just a snowball effect.

To go further on the point that a well loved person has a glow, if you think of the guys that always get the girl...he probably has that glow. Thats what attracts women to him, he's comfortable in himself and what he has to offer. I'm saying this to say whatever you have to do to get that glow do it. It only benefits you and those around you.

@devajones,
Agree absolutely, thank you so much for sharing something so precious. Pity many males grow up so ridden with confusion, social condemnation, and hangups we really are not allowed to explore our sexuality with joy and happiness and freedom.
You are indeed a treasure.

For a long while now, I have used the expression "to make love", rather than the altogether more utilitarian, "to have sex". I think there are a small percentage of men who know and use "make love" innately, but for others it is only learnt - often painfully, and often very slowly.

I think this concept has been my biggest asset in making progress with the aneros, BUT I am not entirely sure which came first, because if anything, my multi-orgasmic experiences have reinforced and enhanced my belief that in an ideal world we should ALWAYS "make love" whenever we have sexual experiences, whether to ourselves or to anyone else.

Good thread this, and wonderful posts from all.

I always made love to my female partners (well I can think of only two times it was not the case) not have sex or fuckk. It's funny I was the only one I didn't do it to.

I just want to clarify a thing I had the impression was not so obvious from reading others. In "make love" the word that matters is love... Really doesn't matter if you do anything or nothing the most important is the feeling. It is not you make things to yourself in a "love-like" way. No, it is feeling deep love, surging desire rooted in fondly bonding that gets you somewhere else and might make you instinctively, compulsively "make" things... but out of love only. It's like love puts you on autopilot. Not just do things in a lovely way. To me, better not doing anything anyway.

Maybe some can realize, loving another as always been loving a part of oneself anyway. This is not fundamentally different. It is loving the other in you and loving the you you usually seek in others. In a word: reuniting.

You dont want to masturbate, you want to mate.

Good luck figuring the mental puzzle juggling.

@Canacan,

Quoting "It is loving, loving the other in you and loving the you you usually seek in others. In a word: reuniting."

Remarkably profound

Deleted by author

@AneRico Exactly.
And I don't think you are hijacking the thread, because the two subjects are deeply interconnected.

We usualy get love totaly wrong because of these "needy" and "self-rejecting" views we tend to have. I guess the key is realising there is no absolute-self and absolute-other, it is always inter-connected and inter-included. The taoists gave us the ying-yang symbol (aka Taijitu) to remind us of this.

This is recent for me. I am still working on it. But I had glimpses and intuitions giving me something to hold on. I now tend to believe loving yourself is a prerequisite before loving anybody else "in a positive way".

And by the way, this "needy" state of mind also acts negatively on many other subjects, starting with the aneros journey milestones. So better learn to move on to another state of mind.

"Love your neighbor as you love yourself"
That is: the capacity to love another is limited by the capacity of our love of self.
The critical point is love of self. (Overlooked but pretty obvious)
A bit simplistic in the company of such giants as AR and C
I am drowning is such bliss..... Thanks