Lots of Questions

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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Mgx tabs

I don't like the MGX tab much either, it chafes after a while.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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I also tried njoy wand and hated it

There are a million different ways to use it though. It's pretty much a big metal finger you can direct how ever you like. It's not like it forces any kind of paradigm on you. I wouldn't give up on it yet. I haven't had amazing results with it either, but one thing it is great for is feeling around in there, and experimenting with different kinds of movement/pressure.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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How do I get over the shame? I'm heterosexual like many on the forum. My father hated gay people growing up and made me feel like it was an absolute crime to engage in anything related, which means even though I'm not attracted to men, I feel like any involvement with my rear is something I'm ashamed of.

Maybe the link to break there is the "anything related" part. I don't agree that it is related, even if that's a commonly held opinion. No more than stimulating your own penis means you like touching penises. How many straight guys have tried to suck their own dick? Probably a lot, but it doesn't mean they want to suck off other men just because they technically "wanted a penis in their mouth". By the same token, your prostate is your own. If you're touching your own body parts and nobody else is around, then sexual orientation doesn't enter the equation to begin with.

I don't know if that helps at all, since these negative emotions are a form of wiring in themselves, and don't listen to reason that much. My own take on it, is that I'm a free person, and I have the right to do what ever I want as long as it's not harming anyone else. It's not for anyone else to dictate my life based on their half-baked opinions. Especially not when it's parroting an unexamined moral conclusion. I'm not religious (in any organized way), but I have a strong moral compass, and prostate massage doesn't violate any moral sense I have... so I'm comfortable in rejecting those external opinions, especially since I know how unexamined they actually are. They exist at the level of Pavlovian conditioning, so why should I take them seriously or let them rule me?

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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I will get impatient on my bed waiting for aneros to work

Impatience is a feature of every lackluster session I've ever had. I think it's a natural consequence of a session not going well, but at the same time worsens the session. I think it's an important loop to escape, because it feeds on itself and goes nowhere.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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I don't know how to build patience with it since traditional masturbation is so easy. Any suggestions?

I don't know if patience is something you need to build, like calluses on your hands after enough hard work. Rather it's something you get for free if you find the right mindset to approach the session.
How about setting aside 1 hour for a session, and have an agreement with yourself that no matter what happens, you'll finish with traditional masturbation at the end of that hour. The hour is for exploring new sensations, and following them where ever they lead. Such that it's not a poor replacement for masturbation, but rather an accessory to it.

I think it's important to point out, about patience... the better your sessions get in general, the less patience you'll need, because it might only take 5-10 minutes before you're really enjoying the session, and not waiting for something to happen. You only need patience to get over this initial hump. Of course impatience can still come up, when you desperately want the session to "go harder", but it's not the same kind of bored, hopeless impatience.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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Is it easy to avoid my aneros smelling of you know what if I use a condom on top if it?

The Syn models are weird like that, I wash mine about 3 times, using soap and anti-bacterial handwash, then after a quick wipe dry, I leave it to air-dry the rest of the way. After that, I find it okay. I mostly use the classic plastic models for that reason, they're much easier to clean. I have heard of people using condoms though, yeah.

I couldn't agree more with Clenchy. It sound like you are struggling with the mind aspect of it(Point 2). Like he said if I am in a rush or really really want to play with the male member it is difficult or impossible to have a prostate O with aneros device. I usually will go with a vibrator massager or njoy at that point if I truly still do want a prostate O. The Helix Syn V is a great one or just about every one sells one and they are usually pretty good or the njoy helps me focus on the prostate instead of playing with the little guy

As a njoy fan some tips. Make sure your on the prostate. For me when I insert it, inside it feels like there is a hard part and if I keep pushing it in there will be a drop and soft squishy part. This is where I understand as your prostate(If I push hard enough I have to pee which confirms it). With the Njoy, I press against the prostate as well as sidling up and down. Add in some PC contractions and when I get close to or having an O rubbing the perineum really fast will push me over the edge or greatly increase the O. I had a great O recently with a shower head spraying on the perineum in addition to the njoy. I am half tempted to try a vibrator on the perineum in addition to the njoy.

Lube life toy cleaner has a fragrance to it which helps to kill the smell. I started with a plastic MGX and since have been turned off by plastic(During a long session it became irritating to have it in).

Just have patience, relax and enjoy what ever sensations you have and see if you can build upon them. For me when I first started having Os it felt like a bubble building up with every squeeze and releasing out of my head.  

@clenchy thank you very much for this well detailed and kind response. I think you're right about the approach to sessions. I also appreciate your explanation and approach about my issues with shame. That means a lot. I don't think I'll solve it right away, but I think when those thoughts of shame and frustration arise I'll have a much better way of dealing with it in the moment. I'm not doing anything wrong and I'm allowed to explore my body in a safe way. Just because I spend an hour during a session and don't have an orgasm doesn't mean I'm not relaxed, slowing down my busy day, and loving myself. 

Do you think I should buy the euphos again? I just want one model and to stick with it. Are the aneros sessions lube fine or should I use coconut oil?

@poptrek thank you for your response as well. I'm torn between helix v and euphos. I still feel like I had better results with euphos than syn and I heard vibrations are counter productive. Is that true? 

I had issues with the wand because it honestly felt like it was heating up and then getting stuck. I got afraid and never used it again. I swear I coated the thing heavily with lube and used the presession injection of lube and nothing worked. 

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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Just because I spend an hour during a session and don't have an orgasm doesn't mean I'm not relaxed, slowing down my busy day, and loving myself.

That sounds like a good mindset. A lot of people compare it to meditation. I would probably add - just lie there and listen to the tiny sensations. You don't even need to move the aneros, even as it sits there, it will apply a pressure that can be noticed. During sessions like this, I used to imagine having a special "ear", that I could move around to different areas and listen.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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Do you think I should buy the euphos again? I just want one model and to stick with it.

Hard to say. My policy is to never throw away my devices, because even if they don't seem to be working for me now, doesn't mean they won't work a year from now. And I've had that happen a lot.
But it's probably a lot easier to live with having 1 model, rather than keeping a box under the bed.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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Are the aneros sessions lube fine or should I use coconut oil?

I don't have experience of these lubes. I use lube that feels similar in consistency to vasoline, to make a thin base-coat over the aneros, then I apply water-based lube over that. My reason being, the water-based lube will dry out, and I'll still need to remove the device after it does. I had some mildly scary experiences early on before I lubed this way, where the session went on so long, and so much of the lube had dried up, that it was hard to take the aneros out.

Posted by: @wonderandpatience

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I had issues with the wand because it honestly felt like it was heating up and then getting stuck. I got afraid and never used it again. I swear I coated the thing heavily with lube and used the presession injection of lube and nothing worked.

... which I think is pretty much what you're experiencing here. ^
If you're interested in the lube I mentioned, it's called "Cobeco Male Butter", and a tub of it lasts ages.

Since it is metal you will have interesting sensations as it heats from your body. I have only tried the small end and never had issues with it getting stuck. The cold of it might be causing you to cramp resulting in the stuck feeling. Try preheating it in a bath of body temperature water. And stay relaxed. I always stick to water based lube from Lube-Life. For the sake of my toys I don't use non water based lube just incase. But as always stop if you feel like it is not right. 

For the beginners the Eupho is only good if you are timid about stick something in your anus. In my experience it is knowing where the toy should be pressing up against to cause an O as much as proper mind set. IMO the Eupho is too small for a beginner and will struggle with location. The MGX and Helix are larger and require less accuracy. The problem with vibes is the opposite effect. Too strong and you won't be able to feel what it is stimulating. And until your mind knows how to process the stimulation you won't achieve an O unless assisted then you more than likely will get a Super T.

For me I have done a lot of exploration and still doing so(AKA I own too many toys). I feel like this was a benefit to unlocking prostate Os for me. I would get an aneros MGX or Trident for sessions where you just want to explore different squeezing sensations. And a larger vibrating massager(Vice 2, Lelo, lovesense, lovehoney, wevibe etc,) just to feel something different to contrast sensations and mix in some squeezing or manipulating the toy. Plus I find Aneros devices don't give very good super Ts unless I have had at least one O(I think it is a matter of the amount of stimulation to the prostate before a traditional O that causes this)

One last thing. It always come down to mind set. Does your mind want to have an O. I have been struggling with traditional Os using strokers.(Death grip syndrome) I got a automated unit and just couldn't even stay hard until I focused my mind into being present, sense the stimulation and enjoying what ever came to be.

1. @clenchy thank you. I am glad I'm not the only one who had that experience. I haven't enjoyed using water based lube for that reason. It feels stuck and I actually love the feeling of that looseness inside. I will try that suggestion. Thank you. 

Posted by: @poptrek

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Since it is metal you will have interesting sensations as it heats from your body. I have only tried the small end and never had issues with it getting stuck. The cold of it might be causing you to cramp resulting in the stuck feeling. Try preheating it in a bath of body temperature water. And stay relaxed. I always stick to water based lube from Lube-Life. For the sake of my toys I don't use non water based lube just incase. But as always stop if you feel like it is not right. 

For the beginners the Eupho is only good if you are timid about stick something in your anus. In my experience it is knowing where the toy should be pressing up against to cause an O as much as proper mind set. IMO the Eupho is too small for a beginner and will struggle with location. The MGX and Helix are larger and require less accuracy. The problem with vibes is the opposite effect. Too strong and you won't be able to feel what it is stimulating. And until your mind knows how to process the stimulation you won't achieve an O unless assisted then you more than likely will get a Super T.

For me I have done a lot of exploration and still doing so(AKA I own too many toys). I feel like this was a benefit to unlocking prostate Os for me. I would get an aneros MGX or Trident for sessions where you just want to explore different squeezing sensations. And a larger vibrating massager(Vice 2, Lelo, lovesense, lovehoney, wevibe etc,) just to feel something different to contrast sensations and mix in some squeezing or manipulating the toy. Plus I find Aneros devices don't give very good super Ts unless I have had at least one O(I think it is a matter of the amount of stimulation to the prostate before a traditional O that causes this)

One last thing. It always come down to mind set. Does your mind want to have an O. I have been struggling with traditional Os using strokers.(Death grip syndrome) I got a automated unit and just couldn't even stay hard until I focused my mind into being present, sense the stimulation and enjoying what ever came to be.

Thank you. I actually want to try the vice 2 but the water based lube dries out so fast that things get stuck or uncomfortable. Clench just recommended a new lube so I'll try that. 

I also struggle with death grip syndrome. It's really difficult to deal with. It was caused from porn addiction and over masturbation for me. Now I only watch porn once or twice a week instead of 5 times a day. But that's why I don't want to watch it during sessions. I know a lot of people watch but I just don't want to go back down that path. 

My trick is to use copious amount of lube. Insert the tip or just a little more a few times and then relube.(This also helps to get turned on) I usually keep my sessions under 30mins and I have not noticed that the toy dries out(Still slimy on removal). If I start feeling discomfort that usually is a sign it has dried or is drying out. Toys are expensive so I always heed the warning of not using oil/silicone based products anywhere near a silicone toy. I also remember reading about being careful about what lube you stick in your anus(In the case of oil based lube).

I have the opposite problem I enjoy edging way too much that its at point where I need the death grip just to get over the edge when it is hand only(I want to make the most out of my sessions but 1+ hour sessions are bad as well) But I have noticed that if I space out my Os. They are way stronger and more intense. I do try to keep to one session a day and I always alternate stimulation. As I believe the same repetitive stimulation is what builds up your tolerance to not having an O. That and hand only Os just aren't enjoyable any more and are only good for a quickie.(For me sometimes a Super O is enough that I can't even get hard afterwards) 

Just stick with it and it will happen. For me, the day that it happened like so many other stories here, I just had an overwhelming desire for prostate stimulation that once I got the device(Helix for me) in there I Super Oed in 30 secs flat.

@poptrek thank you. I'm going to try this and I'll just try to enjoy the process. I know some members here have waited well over a decade so I don't want to complain too much lol. Just want to make sure I'm on the right path.

Yes, just keep at it, try not to compare your experiences to others and so get discouraged, you will feel pleasure and your body will benefit

Yea I think personally the main thing is to just go into the session with 0 expectations. Try some like contracting and see what movements feel best. Once you can find sort of a pleasure spot slowly repeat that until you feel that building. Plenty of lube helps big time. Also taking  focusing on that pleasure you feel inside on your prostate. 

Thanks for the responses. I'm noticing I feel more sensation on the left side than right side. Does this mean i should tilt the aneros to the side?

 

I'm also not trying to force anything this time around. 

I have a few days where I have plenty of time for sessions but I don't feel aroused. I remember my worst sessions happened when forced so I'm trying to keep it natural even when time permits. 

For the use of the condom there is a section on the wiki here:

https://wiki.malegspot.com/index.php?title=Advanced_Skills

otherwise for the cleaning of Aneros plastic models after soap I use an alcohol-free disinfectant for the skin directly on the plastic it destroys bacteria and removes odors, it works very well.