I purchased the Aneros over one month ago. I am a very fit person (6'2", 200 lbs), married for 25 years, and very active sexually with my wife only! My wife keeps me locked in The Curve chastity tube.
After several sessions with the Aneros, I finally thought that I should write and gain advice. I use plenty of KY, am relaxed, and have plenty of time. I have followed all of the instructions on the web site plus reading advice from several contributors to the forum.
I can barely feel the pressure against the prostate and absolutely no sensation from the "sweet spot". If I am on my stomach (most comfortable) and I reach behind me an press the handle part against my body, thus creating a more "forward" angle of the head of the Aneros, I do then feel some pressure against the prostate.
However, if I take one of my wife's vibrators, I can use that quite effectively and stimulate the prostate.
Are there any suggestions? At this point, I am ready to cut off the handle, send it in, and get a refund.
Thanks for any advice!
Tom
Don't throw in the towel yet! I can honestly say I was very close to your predicament when I first started. Also, coming from someone who has yet to reach the Super O, I know I have had sensations that are unlike anything I have felt before and I really enjoy them. Some are not necessarily orgasmic in that they require some concentration, but they are encouraging. I found that an erotic thought and a relaxed body will get me to the stage where I can sense these sensations.
Try lying on your back. The reason I say this is I have had some frustrating sessions while on my stomach. I feel that the pressure (frontal) on my penis and groin area DISTRACTS me. I want then to manipulate and stimulate my penis. This is NOT the way to go. The sensations created by the Aneros will need concentration on the rectum, anus, "sweet-spot", and prostate. If the unit isn't engaging these areas you can modify slightly the unit to better engage. Sometimes, bending the abutment tab toward the main body will engage the sweet spot a bit tighter and that seemed to help me. Also, as stupid as it sounds, shave your perineum. This may help as well.
You may also want to try some meditative techniques before AND during the use of the Aneros. They will help you relax. The sensations only seem to come along if your contractions are miniscule in comparison to what you might use during intercourse with your wife. I had some trouble "reprogramming" those muscles to not just slam that Aneros home and in. The lighter the contractions, the more intense the sensations that arise.
I hope you can have something happen that will discourage you from throwing in the towel, but then again what do I care if you give up? Just kidding!
Mr Mayfield described this in one post as a "Sensory Journey." Have a good time on this journey. Give yourself permission to enjoy it. Maybe there are still negative thoughts associated with anal play for you. Let go and have fun!
-Scooby
P.S. The chastity tube you describe - are you serious??
Maybe whats holding you back is the fore knowledge that if you start enjoying the sensations you butt has to offer your wife will put some kind of cage on that too.
Thanks for the feedback. I will give it some more time. I have tried on the back, stomach, and sides. I am relaxed, have plenty of time, but maybe I am trying too hard.
Regarding the chastity device, don't knock it until you try it... what a trip! We have been married for 25 years, totally faithful to one another, with four children. We have an extremely healthy sex life, but I was having real problems with self-gratification, though my wife is very eager to please. I bought it from www.cb-2000.com, and got the CB-3000 model. It was my idea, not hers. In fact, she was rather surprised, but honored, to think that I would go to that extreme to control myself for her.
Yes, she has the key(s), and I have no access to masturbate. It's on 24/7 unless she unlocks it. Totally hygienic and comfortable. But I want to be totally reserved for her pleasure, not mine. Trust me, the rest of the senses come alive that you never knew that you had.
Again, thanks for the encouragement and advice. Let's see what happens.
Tom