Depression, anger, desperation after a near-Super O

Finally i meet another person, after 15 years of aneros use, someome else that feels this way. Maybe it will show rumel and others its not just a mind issue that can be controlled, its a physical chemical response without control.

Posted by: @theeagleandwolf

Finally i meet another person, after 15 years of aneros use, someome else that feels this way. Maybe it will show rumel and others its not just a mind issue that can be controlled, its a physical chemical response without control.

I would like to point out to you that I acknowledged there are many factors besides mind noise which may affect an individuals ability to achieve pleasurable results using their Aneros massagers. I listed some of those factors in the thread Identifying Obstacles to Progress. In particular, please read item #8.) Health Issues. In that paragraph I said

One's own body chemistry may be out of balance or nutritionally deficient.

This would include the body's neurotransmitters and the various regulatory hormones our body constantly employs to keep us functioning optimally. There can very well be a chemical imbalance of some sort which is causing a physical blockage to pleasure. Likewise, that same chemical imbalance may trigger an adverse reaction when certain physical stimuli such as prostate massage is applied to the body.

Unfortunately, most of us will live our lives without knowing about some of these imbalances. Even if we went through all manner of tests with endocrinologists, the incredible complexity of our bio-chemical processes may preclude ever ascertaining a definitive solution to resolving the imbalance.

I hope that clears up my opinion for you.

Good Vibes to You!

No, you are not the only one.

This is the first time I have posted for years. I had full body orgasms from the word go about 8 years ago, which just got better and better, had an amazing super-O orgasm everywhere including my head for hours. Then had a Kundalini syndrome. Lost the ability to orgasm at all from the aneros, nil, not the slightest thing. I went through what I can only describe as a withdrawal like stopping heroin, I was desperate to have a full body orgasm again, would have probably killed for it, I was angry that it been taken away and I got no help on this forum just lots of advice to relax and that it would come back.

I'm only here now because I picked up my Progasm again this afternoon and managed to have the first orgasm I have had for maybe 6 years. Not full body, but it was very pleasant and left me with a nice glow. The last time I tried I was very much like you, and believe me I tried so many times to get back what I had before.

Back when I was here before there was lots of talk about energy channels and Chakras. I think mine were permanently blocked by the Kundalini syndrome, possibly for my own protection, so that I couldn't do it again - it was a terrifying experience and it can send you mad. That is my theory anyway. May not help you, but it's an interesting thought that it's all about energy channels. Make of that what you will. 

I’m very sorry to hear this, I think honestly it sounds like your getting frustrated about not reaching new heights in your sessions, and you don’t even realize it. It’s either that, or there’s some kind of other problem going on with your chemistry, it does indeed sound like depression or something. because I have never had that happen ever in a session. I have autism and am not sure how to go about answering this question, but the only real thing I can say is, you’ll get there eventually, and don’t get down about it. Hope this helps in someway...

Posted by: @smudgefish

 Then had a Kundalini syndrome. Lost the ability to orgasm at all

@smudgefish , it's really nice to see you back!  Also glad to hear you're back in the Aneros saddle (or Aneros back in the @smudgefish saddle) with positive results.

Do you mind telling us a little more about your Kundolini syndrome experience?   I had a flirt with what I thought was a very mild case of Kundalini syndrome a few years back; the experience was scary and I took it as a warning to be careful. I remember some threads written in the forum about the subject.  

I know this is a real threat and can sometimes be very traumatic with lingering effects.

Take care.

@ggringo thanks for the welcome back! Of course, I would be very happy to tell you about my Kundalini syndrome, it was a life changing event and I still don't understand exactly what happened. It might be a bit of a long post though!

In 2015 I read about aneros devices, thought it sounded like fun and bought a Progasm, carefully hiding it from my wife until she went out for the day. I inserted it and followed the instructions, nothing happened. I tried again another day with the same results, read that it can take a long time to get any results and thought maybe it's just a gimmick and didn't expect much. A day or two later I went on a course in London staying overnight and took the Progasm with me. I lay down on the hotel bed, inserted the device and lay down and started breathing as described on this site. Something started to stir, and each time I breathed it felt better and better. Bam! Suddenly I had orgasmic energy crackling across my abdomen in waves of absolute ecstasy, it was the best and most intense sensation I had ever felt in my life, a hundred times better than an orgasm, being gripped in waves of pure pleasure, groaning and writhing around. It lasted about an hour. I was quite shocked and amazed. I started again and the same thing happened. Before I knew where I was it was 3am and had to be up early so I cleaned up and went to bed thinking that I had discovered the secret to pure ecstacy on demand.

At this point in my life I was very unhappy. I had a young family. I was working as a doctor doing very long hours, constantly exhausted. My marriage was rubbish, sex had stopped and my wife was generally very angry with me and the world. The progasm seemed to be the answer to everything.

On getting home the sessions just got better! I remember having whole body orgasms lasting for hours. My body must have been soaked in endorphins, serotonin and all the other feel good hormones. I remember orgasming and then feeling like I was wrapped in a warm blanket of shear pleasure and love covering my whole body. It was very much like taking a drug which was a combination of ecstacy, heroin, crack cocaine, and every other drug you can name.

Then I had the orgasm to top every orgasm I had ever had. By this point I could control exactly where I orgasmed just by concentrating on a point in my body. This time I let it rise up my body like a wave of electric energy, I concentrated on my chest and felt a beautiful orgasm grip my chest, and then I brought it up into my head something I not yet done. I felt waves of orgasm in my head and I panicked, I suddenly wondered if it was safe and thought that I might give myself a stroke, so quickly stopped the orgasm and went to sleep.

I think it was about 2 days after this I started to feel very strange. I was starting to feel very strong waves of what felt like electricity surging up from my pelvis into my body, but it was like be electrocuted by about 1000 volts and it wasn't pleasant. Each wave made me panic because it felt totally out of control and I didn't know what was happening. I quickly worked out that I had to calm down because the more panicked I felt the worse the electrocution felt. I also quickly worked out that it was a direct result of having an orgasm in my head.

Going outside and getting fresh air helped. I stood outside and suddenly felt a sense of a greater reality as if I can see that this world is not all there is, and I had a feeling that reality is much bigger than what we can see. I remember thinking to myself that if I was religious that I would call it a religious awakening. It felt very strange indeed, and difficult to describe.

I had moments of feeling elated, but very much under control emotionally. The problem was that as I started to feel good the sensation of being electrocuted started to rise, and I had to keep control.

I also felt intense love for everyone. I looked at my wife and felt a deep love like I had never felt before. Kissed her and felt the energy rise up me very intensely, and panicked. I wondered what would happen if I lost control and the energy took me over, it felt powerful beyond belief and it was all I could do to just about keep it under control. I felt great and happy for the first time in ages, but I wasn't having a good time.

I'm a doctor. None of this fitted any illness pattern I had ever heard of before. I wondered if I was going manic, but my wife didn't seem concerned. I wasn't making plans to start big projects, I wasn't talking incessantly, I was sleeping ok. And no psychiatric illness is associated with feeling like you are being electrocuted. I was working normally. When my mind was otherwise engaged I was ok.

I had a patient who was a clairvoyant. She came for an appointment with me. As she walked into the room she stared at me and asked what the hell I had done! She could see auras and told me that I had energy pouring out of my head and I had opened my crown chakra. Hearing that confirmed to me that something very strange was happening.

I think I posted on here and someone mentioned Kundalini Syndrome, so I googled like mad and yes! I had found out what was going on. I read about grounding and eating the right things, and also about how serious it is. At least I could now put a name to it. Strangely someone else seemed to be going through the same thing.

I read about full Kundalini awakening and worried that I was going to go through that. I could feel a burning at the base of my spine by now and any excitement or thinking about it too much made it worse. I warned my wife that I might suddenly start acting very strange and even go unconscious if Kundalini were suddenly fully triggered, I was very worried about this.

It got weirder before it got better. I had several much more spiritual experiences. I was aware of beings of light hovering around me at one point I could almost see them standing behind me. I saw the ghost of a little boy in our living room. I lay down in bed and felt a being of light next to me (I think it was my deceased grandmother), then it was like a beam of light entered me and I was filled to total and utter love and peace and acceptance. It was a powerful experience, love like you can never experience in this life and something I will always remember.

After a week or two the energy started to calm down. Then I felt my chakras start to open. I was stood in the shower when I felt another beam of light attached to my chest and I felt pure love again. It made me cry. Then I felt my solar plexus chakra open as I was walking through the kitchen. That was the last thing that happened and it all settled after that.

I wanted answers. I joined a Buddhist group. I started meditating. I got interested in lucid dreaming and out of body experiences. I read about everything spiritual I could lay my hands on. I decided to give up my job and do something a bit more part time. I went for counselling with a lady who was clairvoyant and seemed to believe what I was saying, but it didn't help. One thing she did say is that the love I felt during the experience was a glimpse of what real love is like in the afterlife and it is something you will never find in this life which is very true. 

I never found any answers. I stopped meditating, I found that I didn't really get on with Buddhism. Life slowly returned to normal. I still don't really know what happened or what it all meant.

I tried using the aneros again but couldn't feel any sensations. I went mad trying to get it to work again and eventually had to give up. My massive orgasms never returned. I was angry and felt empty. My marriage remains rubbish, and no sex, but I am in a better job as a doctor now. I still have an interest in spriritual things but nothing like I used to. Life has largely returned to normal.

Except I now have no fear of death.

I remember ChuckJo2000 pointing to his near-incoherent scribblings on the old-old forum following a Kundalini rising: he had a spiritual out-of-body experience that shook him to the core.

Wow @smudgefish , what an experience you went through and with the lingering effects. I know for sure now that what I did experience was nothing like what you described.  BTW, thanks for sharing.

At the time, there was a lot of discussions on the forum about transferring energy and chakras points; I was practicing the process quite aggressively.
My experience happened during the night following an intense session (but no super-o). I awoke suddenly feeling like I had my finger in a light socket and couldn’t pull it out. Waves of electrical current running from the tip of my toes to the top of my head and tip of my fingers. My heart was racing and fell like it wanted to exit my body.

This must've lasted for about an hour or more before it slowly subsided leaving me shaking as if I was locked in a freezer. Eventually, calm waters returned and I found myself in calm seas and what seemed like one of the best aless session I ever had. You would think that this great aless feeling was welcome after the lightning strike I just went through but it was not. I was scared and wanted desperately to go back in time to before ever discovering prostate play.

Like you, I stayed away from my massagers but only for a week or two. Finally, I gently got back on the horse to ride again but always with great caution to encourage energy flow beyond my control. Maybe that's the reason I never reached the super-o level but I’m ok with that. The good vibes I experience in all my Aneros and aless sessions are more than welcomed as I never had such good feelings before.

Although I'm in a 43 year married relationship (love-filled but also sexless), I went through this experience by myself as my tender half is not aware of my adventures. To her, the butt hole is for one and only one purpose and that's not play.

Finally, you, as a doctor, are probably in the front lines of this atrocious virus so thank you for being there! What you guys do every day is absolutely amazing!

Anerosing is probably the best escape for you and many of us. Do take care and stay safe!

Ggringo

@ggringo it sounds as if you certainly experienced some of the same effects - the electricity was really quite terrifying I'm please to hear that yours settled quickly.

It was actually therapeutic to tell my story again thank you. It seems like so long ago now but looking at dates (I wrote a lot down at the time) it was only 5 years. I don't think about it very often any more but when I do I always wonder what it all meant. I remember reading somewhere that a Kundalini activation can take up to 10 years to have its full effect so I'm possibly only half way there!

I often wonder if it is in fact a very rare form of neuro-psychiatric disorder triggered by prostate over stimulation. In one way I hope it isn't because I had some very meaningful and life changing experiences around the reality of existence and who we really are, and what happens when we die. It might have just been a bizarre neurological response with some bizarre brain chemistry and had no meaning on the other hand, and one day it might be studied and explained.

Luckily it is rare and I have only spoken to one person who experienced anything similar to what I went through. I would be interested of course to hear if anyone else has been through anything similar.

Thanks for the 'thanks'. I have to say I'm a family doctor (GP) so not doing anything like the hospital doctors and nurses who really are putting their own lives on the line, and I'm currently on a week off so actually doing nothing right now (although I do have to work over the coming weekend and bank holiday which I haven't done since I was a hospital doctor).

You stay safe as well!

Posted by: @smudgefish

 

My body must have been soaked in endorphins, serotonin and all the other feel good hormones.

Could too much dopamine, endorphins or serotonin in a body cause side effects? 

@ggringo - Don't think so.

@smudgefish

@train-main-anthony

I don't know about chakras or kundalini, and I don't think this was entirely about the orgasm itself. In my head, the orgasm is supposed to be a shared experience. That's a whole other discussion in itself, suffice it to say I think people who say "Sex is meaningless, it doesn't matter" are out of their minds. Again, a different topic altogether.

And yet, related. When I go into a session, I do so with an imaginary partner. How's that for a revelation? This person is some kind of gestalt of past relationships, images of people that caught my attention, and so on. The short of it is, when the fantasy is done and reality sets in, and I look around and see I'm in my room on my own again, that's when the crash comes. Barclay's Syndrome, if you get that reference.

But I don't know, though. I've had dreams that I was pretty bummed to be woken up from, but I never had any trouble getting out of bed and saying "Time to start the day". I wasn't jonesing to get back to sleep or anything. Maybe its being older, or being jaded, scarred, whatever. Point is I used to be better at dealing.

You talk about a Kundalini Syndrome and other spiritual experiences. At some point, my sun went out, and I'm walking through a Long Dark Night of the Soul.

@kaygo This might not help you, but it's true that there can be a darker side to Aneros use and it probably depends on each individual, I'm sure a lot of users will only get mostly positive things, but no activity is 100% risk free.

I'm on a month long break from sessions now, trying to deal with some very intense experiences I had. I believe I had a brush with ego-death, and prior to that I was having daily sessions that lasted for hours, everything else took a backseat. Having sessions was getting more important than sleeping or eating. I was blissfully happy during my sessions, then later the "real world" seemed so bland... I understand that this exactly what a drug addict would say. I don't even drink alcohol or take any medication...

 I did a lot of thinking and journaling and I still don't have all the answers... what I can tell is that my body will definitely NOT stop me, I believed there was some kind of mechanism that would prevent me from going too far, but now I'm not that certain. Stopping wasn't hard when I took the decision, which I think is very strange.

I lost 10 pounds before I stopped (I'm not a big guy and this is what alerted me to the fact that things were definitely NOT right...) and my libido also disappeared completely for about 3 weeks after I started my break but things are slowly getting better. I'm sure I'll have great sessions in the future but I'll probably wait until mid May to try again and try to not go "too deep" this time. 

Wow. I have not even read half this thread and it all sounds oddly familiar. This is some deep water we're wading into here. I had never heard the term khundali syndrome til today. Got a lot of reading to do now.

Smudgefish, thank you for sharing your story. I can make more sense of my own narrative now, and I know I'm not alone, and I have more ideas about where to work on my life.

Believe it or not, I think SR is the problem here. I know I've mentioned it once before, a few years ago. Maybe it's just the kind of being I am, but I really can't seem to let it build up for long without falling under a shadow. 

I think the difference between the first time I mentioned it and now is that I think I've worked out a balance and a rhythm. Plus I guess rewiring is far enough along that even after a release, I can hop right back into the P-spot mindframe as if I hadn't missed a beat, maybe even a little more intense than before. It's like, imagine being cooped up all day for a week because of rain. Then one day you say "Screw it", put on some clothes you don't mind getting wet, and go for a walk. You start to feel better, exercising long-neglected muscles, and as a bonus, the clouds break and the sun dries your clothes as you make your way back.

So there you are. That's what SR is to me, cabin fever.