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08/07/2019 2:27 am
My first post.
No questions, no groundbreaking information, just my introduction and story. This is the beginning of what seems to be a very exciting, life changing journey, for the rest of my Life.
Background:
66 years old, new to anal play. Met my wife when I was 16 in 1968. Lost her to cancer in 2017. I was alone for the first time in 50 years. Sex the last year was less and less frequent. After she passed I couldn't keep my hands off myself. Maybe grief & pent-up sexual desire just collided. I didn't judge this time period I just let it go for what it was. My whole life just changed dramatically. A lot of feelings did not make sense.
After several months of bleeding myself dry, I desired more and ordered my first ever fleshlight. That kept me happy for about a year. (Aside from a couple of massagers my wife and I weren't into toys very much.)
I started desiring something more and began toying with my anus a little bit. But I had this hang up that I believe is driven by society that any anal play is only for gay men. But I continued to explore mostly with my fingers and discovered I liked it. I finally read several articles that convinced me that this was just a societal hang up. So I went to the Fleshlight website and ordered a vibrating butt plug.
Meanwhile I started reading a whole lot more on the internet about anal play and ran across this forum which talked about prostate massage which I didn't know anything about. So by the time the vibrating butt plug got here I was ready to try this prostate massage thing, but I had the wrong tool. However I had some really good times with it, I got a small taste of completely different sexual feelings that I've never experienced. I then turned around and bought a Helix syn.
I will say this when I first read a post about how to do this, 15 to 20 minutes of just relaxing your mind, 15 or 20 minutes of getting aroused. And having two or three hours to set aside I thought everybody was nuts. But now I sometimes spend hours laying in bed with this thing in me.
And when I got the Helix syn, I started getting addicted to that thing and couldn't keep it out of my butt. I would have a session and decide not to have another one for a couple days, but 24 hours later I'd walk past my bedroom and the thing was just calling to me. It's like it was drawing me to it. Maybe it was just the newness of it and the promise of what might come. It just felt so unusually good to have it in there.
Lately most of my sessions leave me feeling as if I've been getting cock teased all night. And so I generally wind up ending the evening with a jack off. But the more I read on these forums the more I see that there's so much more ahead and I need to just have patience and it will happen when it happens.
I think I just need to embrace the feelings whatever they are when they come. Tonight I was determined not to touch myself at all. And so I just put my aneros in and let it be what it was going to be with no expectations. And although nothing happened aside from some general small pleasure, I was comfortable with it because I had no expectations.
On one session I think I did have involuntary muscle contractions. But I wasn't sure if I was doing it consciously or not. But after reading another post tonight it looks like they really were involuntary.
And another session I had some body shaking with some pleasure but not lots. So I seem to be having lots of the smaller milestones which are promising signs since I'm such a newbie.
And I read in the last couple days about aless sessions, and I find that quite exciting. And also asexual sessions. I get pleasant feelings when I do kegels, (aless) but I'm not sure if that's just in my brain or if it's actually in my butt. And one of the things I think is, Holy Cow where has this been all my life. I've only just begun this journey and it's already blowing my mind of what I've experienced and what is possible.
I have entertained the thought that I may never have sex with a woman again. And this whole prostate massage journey has put me in a place where I can have the best sex of my life by myself. WOW...... This is just mind-blowing to me. They need to start teaching this in pre marital counselling. This is so unfair that I've never heard of it before. And I haven't even gotten very far down the path.
Thanks to all of you that have openly shared your innermost feelings. I don't know any of you, but I feel like I'm connected and that this is a safe place. Even if no one reads this post I feel better writing it all out. Because I know if anybody does read it many will fully understand some of the things I've said.
08/07/2019 3:23 am
Wonderful post! Welcome to the forum.
The feelings you get in your aless sessions are in your brain AND your butt. The line between physical and psychological is going to get more and more blurry. The word “sensation” implies both a stimulation and our perception of that stimulation, so the two are inextricable. This new world you’re so lucky to be tapping into is all about amplifying the perception side of things.
For me my sessions get me as excited as when I am with a partner. With my toy in I sometimes talk to partners who are not there, to imaginary partners. It is very real and very exciting.
It is unfortunate you didn’t know about aneros before... OR it is awesome that you learned about it now! You have many years of adventures ahead of you. I have talked to more than 50 young men about aneros and they all are not interested in putting things up their butt, or the amount of time involved. It is not easy to get the word out about this fascinated world of prostate pleasure, as most men are happy with their sexuality as is.
08/07/2019 7:39 am
A great post @Alaska I love the way you've described it and the language you use. Some of the things you describe I have also experienced especially the desire to want to keep using it. You are a similar age to me and like you I experienced the improvements when you spent time pleasuring yourself and the feeling of well being. I just wish more men would be more open to trying it and getting the benefits from it.
08/07/2019 7:32 pm
So sorry about your dear wife,I have often wondered about people who lose their spouse.I think a lot of people think about these things but nobody talks about it.Kudos to you for baring your soul and I hope you find peace and happiness.
08/07/2019 8:10 pm
alaska.....sorry for your loss.
good to know you have discovered the world of aneros and it's life changing experiences; and also this excellent forum with it's abundance of quality info and advice.
i am in my seventies and a late starter whose sexual desire and activity has been transformed since treading this new path.
sm.
Topic starter
08/07/2019 8:11 pm
So sorry about your dear wife,I have often wondered about people who lose their spouse.I think a lot of people think about these things but nobody talks about it.Kudos to you for baring your soul and I hope you find peace and happiness.
I have found peace, and this new journey is just another path to travel on my forever journey. Thank you for your sincere kindness.
08/07/2019 9:38 pm
Alaska, I would like to thank you for the generosity of your first post, which really is a very nice way of making yourself known and you are treading in some very healthy footsteps by articulating your experiences here. I have only been on this forum for a month and it's refreshing to see guys write openly and intelligently about their experiences.
I too am sorry for your loss, but as we know, sometimes with loss comes liberation and new journeys, which has been a big characteristic of my own life over the last ten years. Life is quite amazing how it works out sometimes, and how we come to discover step 2 after step 1 or sometimes go looking for 'A' only to find 'B' instead. I am glad you have had the opportunity to explore this part of your inner self and satisfaction, to find a new chapter in your development and enjoyment. Like many here will I agree, I am sure, there are just far too many guys who are not informed enough, or open-minded enough, to embark on this sphere of pleasure.
Concerning your 'Holy Cow' remark, better to find things in later life than not at all. After all, if everything due to show up for us in our lives came when we were 'young', then there would be no joy of discovery further down the road. So enjoy everything that is coming to you now and in the future, man!
I wish you a long and fulfilling journey and I look forward to reading more of your posts.
08/08/2019 5:36 pm
Welcome to the forum @Alaska ! Sorry to hear of the loss of your wife, that is a difficult transition to experience.
Keep posting and ask any questions you might have, we are here to help!
08/15/2019 10:57 am
Great post and thread. Welcome to your journey. I found out about this later in life too. If your experiences are anything similar to many others on here, hang on as your definition of `HOLY COW' is likely to change a lot too. What was the holy cow moment to me a year ago seems tame in comparison to the results I am getting now. Hydrogen bomb may be a better description for now.
As for the anal play aspect, I was a little hung up on it too for a while. But now I am grateful that my prostate is located where it is - a place that takes just a little time, effort, and privacy to get to. Imagine what life would be like if all those nerve endings were in a readily accessible area like the elbow...nothing would ever get done :).
Wish I could find the post on here that was describing the experience of exploding out into one infinitely flat pancake. At the present, my journey is taking me to a place where I am finding that as the pleasure builds, it shrinks into the smallest of physical spots. I massage that spot with only the slightest of device movement... can't be much more than a millimeter of movement....let my mind totally go and boom...Hydrogen bomb that just keeps expanding and expanding and expanding each time that spot and the massager meet. Seems like it happens with absolutely zero effort on my part and goes on for quite some time.
keep going and don't be afraid to experiment with different techniques. That is half the enjoyment of this whole adventure. I hope you too become a flat, infinite pancake!
08/15/2019 5:05 pm
I wish you the best in your new found lifestyle and journey...would be pleased to help in any way.
08/16/2019 9:10 pm
@DLD Nice one. That's my type of imagery!
Topic starter
08/28/2019 9:57 am
Imagine what life would be like if all those nerve endings were in a readily accessible area like the elbow...nothing would ever get done :).
LOL - now THAT is funny.
As for the anal play aspect, I was a little hung up on it too for a while.
I am surprised how quickly I got over that hang-up. And that I am openly discussing it online.
keep going and don't be afraid to experiment with different techniques. That is half the enjoyment of this whole adventure. I hope you too become a flat, infinite pancake!
I have been on vacation and away from my toy, I am excited & nervous to get back to it. I had diminished results before leaving.
I am thinking it was forced & rushed & expectations that caused it. I need to just chill and enjoy. So difficult to rewire this penile centric brain that wants pleasure now! BUT I am confident it can happen, I guess this is what women can feel. Trying to get an orgasm with a clueless partner.
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