The well spring of my sexual response flows from the depths of my aroused mind, from deep in my anal canal and under the base of my cock inside my groin; the desire that inspires those responses is a result of real time visions, recalled images, personal intimate memories and imagined fantasies. My desire and response are fickle. Orgasm may choose many different paths as it exerts its power over my body. The mental images may be a memory of a friends erect penis in my mouth or J’s sodden – hot vagina sheathing my own cock and sucking it lasciviously or it may be of my cockhead rubbing against a cockhead, oozing my precum on him as I straddle him and hump him to ejaculation. In the peak of MMO it is often the image of me frotting a guys cock until we both ejaculate on each other that inflames my MMOs to incendiary levels. All of these images will indeed cloak my mind in eros, stiffen my cock and make my anus twitch hungrily.
In the tempest of MMO I often fantasize about the extreme possibilities such as being vulgarly penetrated by a long hard cock; as orgasmic rapture clouds my mind I imagine I am being fucked by a handsome younger man. My mind is often filled with all kinds of lascivious thoughts as my prostate pulses and my anus flexes in anguished euphoria. The paths my sexual ecstasy chooses to expresses itself inside me is one of the wonders of my sexuality. Each sexual journey is a mysterious event that leaves me wondering when I will settle down and be “normal”.
What I experienced two days ago as I lay naked in bed in a dimly lit hotel room in the dark of early morning hours from home is yet another twisted path in my discovery effort. When I arose from the hotel bed after an extended MMO session at 6AM, the top sheet that I laid on the bed under me was sodden with my prostatic fluid and my legs trembled from 2 hours of the most tortuous pleasure I have experienced in quite a while. Relentless orgasms forced my anus to yield to their intense power as chains of anguished ecstasy forced it to flex in rhythmic orgasmic contractions. My prostate pumped desperately expressing the white hot sensation of hard and repetitive nonproductive orgasm. I struggled to cope with the anguished pleasure that was impaling me as arousing imagery scrolled in my consciousness in a lurid erotic kaleidoscopic performance. I recalled sequences of events experienced with men I have bedded in the past, sensual liaisons with my wife and lurid fantasies that drift in my conscious daily.
The instigator of all this in the hotel room that night was a dream; that dream inflamed my desire and woke me at 3 AM; it was of serene, tender and sensual erotic intimacy with a young woman who I sensed was barely of legal age. The dream left me with an iron hard erection that was drooling like a dog panting at an unseen steak on a counter top. Just as a dog would smell the scent of raw meat on the counter, my olfactory memory recalled the scent of an aroused woman’s vagina causing my penis to become rigid with desire. Aroused and tensed, my cock was hardened by a visceral thirst for orgasmic pleasure. That thirst for pleasure could only be slaked by long slow laps of MMOs licking in the deepest recesses of my anal canal stroking my prostate with warm wet tenderness.
At the same time my anus was tantalized and twitching by the erotic hunger my rigid cock was thirsting for stimulation by the amazing reality of that dream; it was so close to my wakeful consciousness I almost thought it was real. It is difficult to describe the ravenous need for pleasure that links my cockhead to my prostate and my anus, and ultimately connecting to my nipples and my brain. Every nuance of the dream tugged on my sleeping limbic brain alerting it to the need that was building in my sexual core. As I awoke and acknowledged the desire that was growing deep inside of me, my cock grew heavy in its rigid intention and ached in muted anguish. It wailed and drooled in quiet desperation as if it was a wolf howling in the darkness to the pack.
The room was body temperature, warmed by the droning hum of the heating/cooling unit under the window. The white noise of the fan warmed the air in the hazy blue confines that surrounded me in the bed. There was a light rain taping at the window leaving residual droplets on the glass that glistened and sparkled as they reflected the light from the parking lot just outside in the blackness. The room was comfortable enough for me to throw the covers off and lay there naked as I imagined an audience surrounding the bed eager to see my nude body and watch me under spotlights as I performed for them displaying my vulgar orgasmic rapture.
The air felt good on my skin as my expanding desire made chills run up my spine. I could hear the rain falling lightly on the lush green leaves of the trees outside the window. The erotic heat was building inside of me; the seething heat of my erotic desire seemed to be warming the room.
A memory of J sleeping in bed with me a few nights earlier captured my thoughts and drew them away from the pubescent girl in the dream that I fantasized laying bed with moments earlier. J always sleeps short nightshirts that expose her heart shaped derriere to me. The memory of her warm bottom under the covers with me pulled on my rigid cock with mystical power as I lay in the bed miles from her. Like a parched soul lost in a desert, my memory drew my cock to search for her like a scent hound on trail in the forest. I recalled the elegantly sexy caress in her warm softness as I nestled my aching cock between her cheeks. I remembered the erotic sensuality of her anus as I rested my rounded cock head against its puckered heat. She always fidgets in her sleep when my cockhead finds her puckered opening, my cleft resting against its pink warmth. The heat of her anus kissing my cockhead is intoxicating and inflammatory at the same time.
As my mind is flooded with erotic thoughts my arousal rises, tempering my cock to the rigidity of steel; it is aching and throbbing in iron hardness. I sit up in bed and reach for the Tempo and supplies that I put on the night stand earlier in the evening anticipating a session. I prepare the Tempo for insertion by opening a condom, filling it with approximately a teaspoon full of lube and dropping the Tempo into it. Holding the condom from the open side I tie it in a knot trapping the lube coated Tempo inside. Squeezing my cock I gather a big drop of precum on my finger and spread it on the tip of the condom. The idea of fucking myself with my own precum as lube really turns me on adding to my arousal. I lie on my side, bring my left leg up to my chest and direct the condom covered Tempo into my anus.
With insertion I feel the wonderful cold of the devise as it penetrates my anus; the cold invasion sends chills up my spine. I lie there savoring the chills as they raise goose bumps on my skin. I then feel the familiarly welcome sensation of the peristaltic reaction in my anus. It is like my anus is trying to regurgitate the foreign invasion. It is a pleasantly odd sensation that captures my attention away from the chills. Then just as I am enjoying the sharply blissful tension of penetration the sensation in my anus spreads and changes to a pulsing contraction that sends tiny ripples of tingling pleasure deep into my anal tract. I breathe slowly and evenly trying to time my breaths to the rising and falling waves flowing into my anus. As I do, the pleasure waves grow.
I reach down and place my middle finger in the rigid crevice under my cock head, my penile sulcus. It is slick with my copious thick precum. I raise my other hand to my left nipple and begin to lightly tease it, brushing my finger lightly against it. I trace the firm ridge that defines my cockhead with my slime coated finger; then reaching the finger that was togging my nipple I down to my slimy cockhead I gather some precum on my finger tip and return it to my now rigid nipple. As I toggle and tease my nipple with my slippery finger tip a jolt of orgasmic energy shoots from my nipple to my prostate forcing my prostate to shift from an exquisite pulsing to a hard pumping contraction. The contraction initiates waves of white hot ecstasy to flow deep into my anal canal as my cock root lurches in orgasmic spasms of bliss.
The tender hypersensitive underside of my cockhead bathed in the sultry sensual memory of J’s anus makes my cock ooze the honey of my passion in greater volume; the head of my cock is coated with precum. My mind succumbs to a memory of J on all fours as I spread her ass cheeks apart and kiss the warm puckered opening from which her forbidden sexual karma flows. Only when she is aroused to an intense level am I permitted to tantalize her with anal play. She was turned on big time that time I was remembering. As I kissed and licked her anus she moaned softly as arousal melted away her reservations and vulnerability in equal measure; in the place of guilt was the peaceful desperation of erotic need. She put her hands to her cheeks and held them apart for me, offering her hole to me in urgent desire. I remember the hazy cloak of arousal and the calming succor of my tongue teasing her opening that caused her to shudder as she passively offered her anus to me savoring my tonguing and anticipating the tantalizing pleasure that I was inflicting on her anus. The memory of that experience redoubled the hard pumping ecstasy that was now rhythmically reverberating in my anus and perineum slinging my cock slime in the process.
My cockhead was swollen and purple in its tormented need as I teased it mercilessly laying exposed on the bed in the hotel. As my cock slit slung my wet desire the memory of her laying there sharing this most erotically vulgar experience with me locked my prostate in a hard contraction of exquisite agony. I moaned and mumbled to myself as my anal tract was gripped in an intensely euphoric orgasmic cramp. I lay there with my cock root pulsing with a rapid vengeance as my anus was frozen at the zenith of a hard orgasmic contraction. I was suspended at the apex of euphoric anguish. Then the kaleidoscope of erotic images in my mind shifted to an elegantly hardened penis. First the penis was in my mouth as I sucked tart precum from the slit in the bulbous head. Then I was straddling the hips of the man I had had bedded last year as I recalled frotting him, rubbing my cockhead on his until I pissed a stream of steaming cum all over his cock.
The memory of that sensual encounter made my anal opening release and clench and release as waves of orgasms were freed from the immobility of extreme pleasure. The ecstasy resumed its flow into my gulping man pussy in metronome like tempo. My prostate resumed its pumping and throbbing in rhythmic regularity, sending waves of orgasmic pleasure up my anal canal. My anal canal responded by amplifying the waves to explode and crash on my prostate producing intense orgasmic sensation that could not be ignored.
I gasped aloud as a chorus of pleasure echoed in my anal canal and gripped my cock root. In respone my penis began to lurch in a spastic dance of lewd abandon, no longer oozing precum; this time it was dribbling fat drops of opaque prostatic fluid onto my finger tip. My prostate was pumping with ferocity. My cockhead was pulsing in time to drum beat of my anus and prostate and the tango of my cock root. The sweet music of orgasmic pleasure was consuming my pelvis, anal canal and perineum with elegant complexity, weaving melodies in my brain that lured me farther and farther away from reality and forced the cream from deep inside me.
Soon all parts of my body were saturated in the maze of anguished rapture was spilling on the bed that I lay on. In the euphoric haze, I looked into the glowing fire of the pulsing orgasm that was consuming me; I saw the face of unadulterated beauty. First it was a beautiful nude young girl her down covered mons hiding her virginal pussy lips, then it was a gorgeous naked man with his cock cantilevered and dripping his desire. My feet and nipples began to tingle, my skin contracted in chills of warm delight, delicate fizzling sensations seemed to be creeping into my asshole as it opened and closed in contractions, rhythmically pulsing with the realization of my desire.
Fantasies of sexual encounters with men now filled my head. In the feverishly steamy moments leading to orgasmic crescendo there is no room for embarrassment or denial. Images of cocks feeding the inferno of my orgasms with their thick steaming cum had the orgasmic inferno roaring inside of me. I didn’t care what gender expressed pleasure in my anus, I drank from them all, visions of semen rolling from pulsing cocks regurgitating cum as they convulsed in my mouth and filling my asshole. It was all good.
I feared that the cacophony inside me was going to cause me to scream, so I backed away from stimulating my cock too much. Rolling onto my stomach I balanced on my hip so that only the tip of my cockhead was gently pressed on the mattress. The cool dryness of the sheets was like drinking cold water on a sweltering summer day. The sensation caused my penile bulb to slow its spasms putting it into counterpoint to the throbbing in my prostate and the spasming of my anus.
My entire pelvis and anus was in a sultry jazz performance that not only filled my body but awakened every inch of my sexual being, forcing my body to pay attention to its engaging musical cacophony. My nipples were as hard as pebbles; they had been erected by the silent erotic jam session that was filling me. The sheets under me were sopping with my sex fluids.
I had been on this stage before and I knew how to contribute to the complex elegance of the musical performance inside of me. Reaching to my right nipple, which was as yet untouched I plucked the hardened protruding nub with my middle finger. It was like this new nipple was the taut thickest string on a double bass, one end was secured deep in my brain but the other was firmly attached to my prostate and my left nipple.
As I plucked my nipple that heavy resonant string vibrated deep inside of me triggering my prostate to resume even harder convulsions in a sequence of a half dozen hard pumping contractions that rose in five or six spasms to extreme pleasure and then falling and rising over and over in mind numbing rapture. At the completion of each set of spasms I repeated the sequence and plucked my nipple to instigate the pumping ecstasy to rise and fall in climbing bliss ending in a crescendo and collapse; each successive plucking of my nipple caused the resulting waves of pleasure to increase in intensity and get louder and louder inside my head.
My cock root was spasming in harmony with my prostate. Chills of orgasmic pleasure again washed over my skin as my insides convulsed in agonizing bliss, causing a profound peace to settle over me as I teetered on the abyss of divine pleasure. At this point the pleasure of orgasm was indeed so agonizing it was difficult to breathe. Yet I knew that deep breathing was necessary to sustain and possibly amplify the sensation that was consuming my body.
I forced myself to inhale deeply and open my mind and relax my anal canal succumbing to the demands of the tormenting sensations and letting the orgasms have total control of me. As the convulsions of ecstasy clamped me down and made me bear down on the inferno of pleasure that was roaring inside me I forced my body to relax as I opened my anal canal to let the orgasms flood into me; allowing myself to savor the intense pleasure I was feeling I began to cry as pleasure so intense it was painful tore into my anus.
Through the divine ache of agonizing pleasure I felt the fantasy hand of penultimate orgasm enter my spasming anus, open it tenderly and take control of my soul. I gasped and trembled as a new spiritual level of pleasure stilled my thoughts and lifted me from my body. I watched myself feeling intense euphoria as I felt it happening. Incrementally the delicate fingers of the most serene orgasmic euphoria imaginable crept deeper and deeper into my anus causing such exquisite sensations of ecstasy that I had images that I was climbing high above the clouds with my breathing coming in gulping gasps. My anal tract was convulsing and gripping the Tempo hard in the anguish of the most pleasurable orgasmic pulsing I had ever experienced. I felt the tip of the device touching my prostate, forcing itr to yield even more sensation.
I struggled to absorb and endure the excruciating ecstasy that now had me suspended over the abyss between serene reality and agonizing fantasy. Struggling to breathe I allowed the sultry invading hand of orgasmic bliss to sink deeply into my anal tract as I surrendered allowing it to extract whatever pleasure it could from me. Whether it was my will or the ancient limbic wiring of my mammalian brain I do not know, but the delicate fingers of that orgasm began to pluck at the thick strings of pleasure on my prostate that I had as yet never discovered.
These new deeply intense vibrations caused my prostate to scream in anguished convulsions of profound orgasm and release an oozing stream of hot cum that seemed to go on for minutes as I released the contents of my prostate and balls all over the protective sheets I put on the mattress. Underneath me was a growing puddle of cum that was getting so large I scared myself.
The resonance of the orgasm was so intense I could feel and hear it in the silent desperation of my thoughts. The orgasm emanated from my wailing prostate played like a flamenco guitar thrilling up and down over and over again against the backdrop of the deeply resonant bass vibration and the chorus of lilting bliss. Over and over and over again the trills of the orgasm rose and fell and rose and feel in eloquent disorder making me shudder as they forced me to piss a stream of cum from my quivering erect cock.
I was sweating, trembling and gasping as I felt my entire body being consumed by this inferno of orgasm. I lost all ability to guide what was happening to me, my body was not mine. The orgasm took control; I became nothing more than a passenger on an enormous pleasure seeking rollercoaster. As the ride played out I was filled with an erotic euphoria that clouded my mind and calmed me as it held me down and had its way with me.
The sublime erotic sensation had held me in the arms of a cruel and delightful orgasmic mistress, allowing me to see her face as she drained me of my cum. She held me firmly as she reached deep into my anus to grasp my prostate in her hand and milk it greedily. Then softly she sang a sultry song describing my own desire for her to me; it was the most sensual music imaginable. Looking deeply into her eyes I saw a reflection of the men and women of my real life and my fantasies played out in a complex melody that only she and I know.
Remembering the music isn’t difficult it just takes the right combination of conditions. I think I know the path to return to her arms but like all parts of this journey I am on sometimes the path changes and I am left guessing what I need to do to find my way there.
It was 6 AM when my two hour journey was over. I began committing the experience of those two hours to words before I forgot them that morning finishing them now two days later. Maybe this narrative will help me find my way back to my temptress. I hope so.