• Rumel’s Ruminations – Part VI

    Hi Guys, the following was taken, several years ago, from the website -> http://electrostrapfist.tumblr.com/…/male-ass-fuck-and-ass-gasm, which, unfortunately, is no longer in existence or I would have just referenced it in my Rumel’s Ruminations – Part V blog entry. I’m glad I copied it because it contains some insightful information which users of this forum may find helpful. I’m sorry I don’t have the authors name to give proper credit but if anyone knows please let me know and I’ll credit them appropriately.

    “Male ASS FUCK and ASS GASM” (Found this on another BLOG.) It is a compendium of anal play for men, and from what I have read, in-depth and comprehensive. Should be good for men and women, who want information on the male anal exploration experience! Enjoy.

    Male Assfuck and Ass-gasm – (Some notes on Male Assfuck and Ass-gasm, since I have never seen this critical arena of sexual response discussed in detail anywhere, even by radical LGBT sexologists…)

    Hard Truths of Male Assfuck
    When a man is assfucked whether by cock or strap-on or other toy or tool, whether by male or female, the man’s cock may:
    _stay soft, _stay hard, _start soft and finally get hard, _get hard then go soft, _get hard then go soft then get hard again at the end, _whatever the state of his cock, the guy may orgasm or not experience anything like orgasm, and/or…, _may ejaculate or may not ejaculate…!
    All variations are possible…! And the next assfuck he receives, if done differently, could produce different results…!

    Technique and gender and shape and size of cock or toy MATTER A LOT and MAY cause variations in the above sexual response to assfuck. The same person could have very different anal sex responses based on so many factors, which means, every assfuck is different. The assfuck you have today, whether or not it is your first, may not be representative of your total anal sex response. Assfuck is something that needs to be LEARNED with you and a partner, over several sessions… slow and steady experimentation with different cocks, toys, actions, angles, situations, thrusting, all to determine what it takes to make your ass and cock happy…

    Orgasm: An assfucked man may or may not have an orgasm just like when he is the penetrator. Or he may just report feeling “really good” the whole time, or feeling a wave or waves of intense pleasure toward the end, or only after it’s over… (See longer section on Ass-gasm below.)
    Ejaculation: An assfucked man may ejaculate right at orgasm, just like when he is the penetrator. Or he may ejaculate without really having an orgasm, or before his orgasmic feelings are most intense, or he may ejaculate with a partial orgasm multiple times and then have a full orgasm. Or not. Or he may experience orgasm without any ejaculation (rare). All could be normal for that guy. Only patient and gentle experimentation by him and his partner will determine what are the ranges and limits of his anal sex responses.

    Pre-cum, milking: a guy will usually start issuing pre-cum when his ass is penetrated and prostate stimulated or massaged directly or indirectly. Pre-cum can issue from a hard cock or soft cock. Some men pre-cum just on arousal, so they will certainly be issuing pre-cum if their ass is stimulated. Pre-cum can issue in droplets and then actually surge or even stream from their cock, but still be pre-cum. Pre-cum doesn’t generally shoot from the cock, but it can stream like a constant flow. Another name for pre-cum is milk or cock-milk. Milking is inducing more and more pre-cum as long as possible without full ejaculation. As milking proceeds the pre-cum may actually start to include semen (whitish) as well as prostatic fluid (generally clear).

    Time: A guy may orgasm and cum within a few minutes of being anally penetrated, or only after many minutes or even hours (yes hours!) of patient application of varying assfucking techniques…! Some guys, maybe most guys (I have no idea, this research has not been done by anyone) need to be assfucked for 30 minutes or more or possibly as much as an hour or more to have an orgasm, or to ejaculate, purely from anal. Age and potency may or may not have anything to do with it. May be totally different from the time it takes for the same guy to orgasm and ejaculate from oral or from penetrating another person.
    In short there is a very big mismatch between the time it takes for most men to cum from penetrating an ass or cunt, and the time it takes for almost any male to cum from being anally penetrated. A much bigger mismatch than when a man fucks a woman in her cunt. Hence in gay porn videos of assfuck, the instance of simultaneous orgasm or even orgasms close in time is much less frequent. Many other issues and prohibitions around portrayal of a male orgasm from being assfucked are discussed further down below.

    This means if you have been assfucked or assfucked your guy for 20 minutes, and all this yielded was “waves of good feeling”, a bit of pre-cum, and then an “intense moment of sensation”, but no real orgasm or ejaculation, and the person says “Mmmm… that felt really good”, then maybe this is all he and you get this time. This could just BE anal sex, for you or for him, right now. When the mood seems right, discuss what feels good and what might feel even better or different next time…
    Maybe this is just the beginning and if you or he were assfucked for an hour or two, with increasing sizes of dildo or with certain plug toys, or when you had fully evacuated or had an enema, or after you get to know each other’s needs and responses much better things could get much more dynamic and you could have a complete orgasm and ejaculation…! Only patient, mindful experimentation will tell…
    If you like your initial assfuck experience maybe you will naturally experiment some more and be on a path of discovery. If you didn’t like your first experience or were left wondering what the fuss is about, or if there was pain or discomfort, probably you have more potential for anal pleasure than this initial assfuck leads you to believe. Try some gentle experimenting on yourself or with a good partner.

    Most important: take TIME to get into it. Anal enjoyment often takes time. It is not like orgasm from penetrating. Do not expect it to be. Certain variations in techniques, genders, personalities, toys, etc. may sometimes be found to reliably produce one or the other outcome in a guy. But the next guy will require completely different variations to produce the same outcome. Male anal sex is weird and different.

    Assfuck Anatomy: when you fuck a man’s ass you are fucking not just the anus but an entire male sex organ, a connected system consisting of (from outside to inside): the perineum, the outer anal ring, the anal lips and anal “mouth” as they call it in yoga, the outer and inner anal sphincter, the prostate, and the rectum. The cock and pelvic floor muscles are all involved. So assfucking is not just pleasurizing the anus. It is fucking the entire anal sex organ. Or more colloquially, the anal fuck-tract.

    As a system the anal sex organ is so full of glands, nerve-endings and muscles, suspensory and connective tissues that it is no surprise this anatomy has widely different sensations and responses in males.
    The anus and sphincter can vary greatly in thickness, depth and elasticity, and the anus can change its response to penetration over time and with training and experience. It can get used to expanding to take larger dildos or cocks, while keeping its tone and its ability to close down.

    You don’t want to have any violent insertion or penetration and risk rupturing or damaging or causing contusions on the anal muscles, since this will i) hurt, and ii) could compromise anal sex permanently and iii) could be dangerous. When you see porn stars taking huge dildos and toys and objects and fists these are highly athletic forms of anal acrobatics and achieved only after extensive practice and training, and with a trusted partner who knows the limits.

    When you see pornstars with prolapsed rectums and ruptured anal sphincters, well, these are permanent rectal injuries that have resulted from abuse of their holes by themselves or others. Abuse meaning: forcing way too large objects in, or in and out, way to fast, too large, too little lubricant, too violent, and without proper training and toning of the ass. More or less that anus and rectum are torn and damaged forever. Prolapse and rupture are NOT sexy, and you do NOT want these results on you or your partner’s ass. EVER. We do not show such things on this blog.

    The Anal Sex Tract is not actually dick or dildo shaped. The shape of the anal sex tract can vary from somewhat linear to very angular, depending on the person’s anatomy. The rectum may have a sharp curve in it, and may lead to a second sharp curve where the sigmoid colon begins. These curves can change dramatically depending on the position of the body, pelvis, hips, legs, and how full the colon is. Distance from anal mouth to the prostate can vary from man to man. The angle needed to touch or rake past the prostate can vary, and can change based on the position of the male’s legs, torso, pelvis.
    The angle and straightness of the anal fuck tract can change during fucking since the anal sex organ can actually relax and lengthen and straighten somewhat to accept cock, almost like that’s what it was meant to do. In some men it’s like their ass “knows” what it needs to do to accept cock. It can be quite odd to experience whether its your own ass or the ass you are fucking. Once everything is loosened and relaxed and lubed up, and the person adopts a certain posture, you could be sliding a quite long cock in and out of their body, to mutual delight. Do NOT expect this on first insertion or after 5 minutes. Porn flics where you see this, the players have taken full enemas and trained and worked their anal sex organs up to this over many sessions. It is advanced sexual yoga. Professional driver. Closed course. Do not try the advanced techniques too soon or fast or you WILL tear something…!
    The total length from anal mouth to the curve where the sigmoid starts can be as little as 6 inches or as much as 12 inches. The curve of the sigmoid could be very tight or shallow. It could be possible to get a big cock to go partly into the sigmoid, if the cock is very long and if it can flex a bit. Some human cocks can bend a bit, and some dildos are very flexible, more flexible than a human cock. It is possible in some men to insert quite long double-ended dildos or cocks up their ass. In other men anything more than 8 inches will bottom out at the curve of the rectum or sigmoid. Do not press harder it will likely hurt and could damage your partner.

    As a general principle you don’t want to damage your partner or suffer damage to your anal fuck tract since you want to be able to keep fucking. There are ways to prepare and experiment with deep penetration but this is not the place to discuss.

    For all anal play: use lots of lube, be safe and clean, take time, don’t go to fast or too deep, listen to your partner, and STOP if there is pain or if it feels at all like there is something preventing you from going deeper.

    You can be hitting the wall of a curve in the rectum or where the rectum and sigmoid meet, and either there will be pain or no pain. Either way, thrusting harder could damage you without you really feeling it right away. Everyone is different. If the cock or dildo seems to be bottoming out or bumping up against something, even if there is no pain, retreat SLOWLY and add some lube and start over, trying a slightly different angle.

    Angle matters: getting the right angle to stimulate what you need in your ass is crucial. The angle does not automatically mean aim at the prostate and bang into it directly. It may mean just fill the ass and rectum with thick cock and continually press the prostate that way. Or use a slim short dildo and repeatedly rape across the prostate gland with the tip. Maybe do that a bit at first and then some other technique… May vary wildly. Some guys prostates are far too painfully sensitive to massage directly with lots of pressure. They just need their ass filled with cock and that will create delightful pressure all around.

    Male’s anal stimulation needs and desires may differ as widely or more widely than women’s needs and desires for how her cunt or tits should be pleasurized. Further: the technique and type of stimulation may change throughout the assfuck. Someone may need gentle insertion and pressure at the start, and then a firmer, longer more rhythmic raping motion as their anal sex tract opens up and they really start enjoying it. And the ideal ’angle’ can change during the session, if you go deeper the angle will change. And/or if their body position changes or their anal sex organ relaxes and flattens out…

    Size and shape of cock and toys: in anal sex far more than vaginal sex, the size and shape of cocks and toys makes a huge difference. Since the anal sex organ as described above has so many parts and nerve endings, it can sense differences in shape and length and texture and firmness and flexibility of toys and cocks. Everyone’s tastes and responsiveness vary. Some people want firmer, more ridgid toys or cocks, Some people want larger or smaller, fatter or thinner, longer or shorter, bulbous or ribbed. The physics and mechanics are truly stupefyingly complex and varied.

    If a couple gets into toys it is not at all unusual to end up with a collection of 20 or more dildos and anal toys. Some people have HUNDREDS. Favorites are quickly identified by feel, and by the results they produce in the ass. It is often hard to predict by look and feel in the sex toy store.
    Size matters weirdly: Larger is not always better or more erotic. You can have huge crashing anal orgasms from large pony-size dildos 5 or 10 times the size of your own cock. But you can also have a huge crashing orgasm from the Peridise, a tiny T-shaped toy the size of a pinky originally designed for soothing hemorrhoids. Or the slightly larger Aneros, a T-shaped prostate toy not much larger than a man’s thumb, designed to act like a pacifier once inserted in the anus. The muscles of the sphincter and pelvic floor tend to clench nicely around the Peridise and Aneros and cause it to nicely thump against the prostate, milking your cock almost automatically, and usually leading to something like orgasmic sensations within about 20 minutes. Sometimes handsfree ejaculation, meaning no touching of the cock needed!

    Straights who get into pegging are blessed with the potential to enjoy incredibly wide variation and experimentation with dildos and butt-toys in their ass, since strap-ons, butt-toys and dildos come in an immense variety of sizes, shapes, textures, firmness and flexibility.

    Gender: the gender of the person doing the assfucking of the male may matter a lot or may not matter much at all. The gender of the person you prefer fucking your ass could be different from the gender of the person you want to be in a committed romantic relationship with, or could be the same.

    For example, most gay males really need their assfuck partner to be a male. That’s what makes them, um gay. An offer from a woman to peg their asses lusciously would likely be rejected. And they would be unlikely to want to be in a long-term relationship with a pegging woman instead of a male, because that would make them um, well, straight.
    By that same token there are straight men who really like their ass to be played with and fucked by a woman, and really and truly don’t want a guy to do the assfucking. Even if their favorite pegging strap-on is a lifelike pornstar dildo and they could have that same actual named pornstar come over and gently FUCK their ass, exactly the way they wanted, they would not be into it, wouldn’t get hard, wouldn’t enjoy, wouldn’t cum. Their dick and balls might even shrivel up and go cold. They just want their assfuck partner and relationship partner to be female. To some this sounds weird. But it is not.
    Going further: consider a straight who likes getting pegged by his woman, does not want to actually get assfucked by any guy, but DOES look occasionally at gay porn and/or shemale porn, and occasionally fantasizes about doing MMF. Is he straight or gay or bi? Who knows what particular aspect of the gay porn turns him on. Gay porn provides hot images of male asses being penetrated by cocks. Straights could be consume these images as “education” on how to fuck their women, or how they would like to be pegged. Maybe while a guy is looking at these he is fantasizing of being fucked by his girlfriend…! Who are we or you to judge? Let him have his freak-on. Who knows how he is processing it? Until he decides to make any of those fantasies a reality and enjoys that reality and changes his orientation, he is just another straight with some kinky fantasies. Big deal. Join the fuckin’ club.

    Let’s go further still: consider a straight male who has proven he is capable of enjoying essentially the same level of anal pleasure from being fucked by a male as being pegged by a woman. Maybe he has done MMF or his girlfriend dared him to get assfucked by a guy they meet at a club, and he enjoys these encounters. He got hard and came from male assfuck just like when his girlfriend or wife pegs his ass. So what does that mean? Well it means for him, at minimum, his partner being male is not a turn-off, it is just sort of equal, or in other words the gender of the person fucking his ass doesn’t actually make a difference to whether he can enjoy it or cum. He is capable of enjoying bisexual sex and has had one bisexual experience. Bravo! Cool!

    But it still does not mean the guy is “gay” or “bi”. Those labels might be relevant depending on whether such the guy decides to seek out and partner up regularly with a male for assfuck, or to perform most sex acts with males. If he gets assfucked by a male only in the context of doing MMF or swinging bisexual sexplay with his female partner, then is he a closet gay or is he just a kinky straight, hetero-flexible or at most bi? And actually, who the fuck cares?

    The fact that the guy COULD enjoy receiving assfuck from a male just as much with a woman, does not mean he is gay. Only a choice to repeat gay sexual encounters or live and self-identify as gay or as bisexual would bring those terms into relevance.

    Thus one MMF encounter where the guy takes it in the ass while his girlfriend gets into watching or participating does not mean the guy is gay or closeted or even bisexual. That one ACT was and is bisexual, but unless the couple make a habit of MMF or he starts constantly seeking male assfuck for himself on the side or with or without her blessing, he is still just a straight dude. Thus, mere ability to enjoy assfuck from a male isn’t going to mean the guy IS gay or bi or will or should live as a gay or bi.
    None of any of the above, as described in this entire article, is more “correct” or “normal” than the other. These are all just labels assigned by a sexually repressed society still in the grip of religious ideologies about the body, sexuality and the ass.

    Ass-gasm: Individual results may vary. An ass-gasm is an orgasm from being anally penetrated. Ass-gasm is induced in part or whole by the effects of anal penetration. If there is other stimulation to your cock, then of course that may be part of what induces the orgasm. (If you have an orgasm while being assfucked…!)
    By “orgasm” one means, at minimum: a feeling of rising intensity of sensation or pressure, possibly also muscle contractions, waves of sensation sweeping through one’s pelvic region, maybe concentrated in the ass and sphincter, maybe in the rectum, or pelvic floor, maybe in the prostate, maybe in the entire perineum. Men describe it differently and point to different parts of their body when asked about orgasm during anal.

    Ass-gasm in men is easily as complex and mysterious as female orgasm. Maybe moreso. Though no one wants to discuss it. In assfuck the feeling of orgasm may or may not include or coincide with ejaculation. Ejaculation during assfuck maybe smaller volume than during other forms of sex, or larger volume. Men who find it easy to get hard, stay hard and ejaculate at orgasm during assfuck usually report or feel that they ejaculate a larger volume of cum from assfuck than from penetrating another person or masturbating. But other men report feeling it is a smaller volume. “Normal” may not exist. Assfuck is different.
    Orgasm and ejaculation may be experienced as partial or incomplete. Some men find they can’t easily have a complete orgasm with ejaculation from being assfucked. Instead they may have a series of “partial” orgasms, waves of pleasure that surge and produce a bit of ejaculation, maybe with a soft cock. And maybe sometimes leading, if the stimulation is continued the way they need, to a complete orgasm and large ejaculation.

    The latter guy may enjoy his assfuck just as much, or even more, than the guy who gets rock hard and cums straight away in five minutes, thank you it’s over.

    Think about it. Which is likely to be more enjoyable, stay with you longer, make you feel all sparky and tingly for a day: five minutes of assfuck leading to orgasm, or fifty minutes or one hour and fifty minutes of assfuck leading to multiple ups and downs of your cock, many waves of pleasure in your ass and whole pelvis, two or three near-miss half-mast partial ejaculations, ending (if your partner has the stamina) in a vigorous ass-rape that manages to make your cock semi-hard or fully hard and finally you shoot a full agonizing orgasm all over yourself? It’s hard to say. (Ha!) Could be either one. Assfuck is different.

    How do you know it was good for him? In some men the male orgasm from being assfucked could show very little outward “action” or “evidence”. In this regard male ass-gasm can be said to resemble a woman’s orgasm… It’s like, how do you know she or he has had an orgasm? If they could have an orgasm or orgasm-like sensations and pleasure without any outward sign, like ejaculation or spurting, then what the fuck?

    Well, one is reliant on their reports, on what they say, and on what you sense about their pleasure. Hmmm. What does that sound like? It sounds like having to ask your girl, “Was it good for you?”
    So in some instances male ass-gasm can actually resemble a woman’s orgasm. Ass-gasm can sometimes be (no other way to say it) very “girlie”. And that’s ok. By “girlie” I don’t mean any stereotypical role plays or stupid scripts like butch/femme, dom/sub, master/sissy that some people try to imply or assume about anal-receptive sex.

    By “girlie” I mean only this: A man could be a total dom, a total Type A, Alpha male, have a deep command-voice, be athletic and strong, able to tear phonebooks in half. He could be an aggressive, dominant world-beater type masculine man with a mission… He could be someone who when he is penetrating his lady or boyfriend in whatever hole, always gets and stays hard as a diamond, and fucks his partner powerfully like a tiger and always cums within a few minutes. He could be a sterotypical dominant male fucker when penetrating.

    And yet when you fuck this guy’s ass, whether you are male or female, large or small, dominat or demure, you watch the guy experience just a whole lot of what looks like ‘good feelings’, maybe there is a bit of moaning and groaning in different octaves, and then a brief sensual wave of intensity, followed by some sighs and sudden breaths, and then some high-pitched cooing, and a little rolling of the head and shoulders….! Wow.

    The big guy may have a monster erection or just a soft cock the whole time. Or it may start hard as a rock and go soft, or go hard-soft-hard or soft-hard-soft. The guy may ejaculate some cum at what you take to be his moment of orgasm, or he may just ooze a little pre-cum the whole time, maybe it starts streaming from his cock but he never actually shoots… No real ejaculation and no real rocking climax…! But he says “wow that was wonderful… Mmmmm!” And then it’s obviously over…
    WTF? What should you think? Have you done a good job? Did he enjoy the assfuck? Is that IT??? It’s like back in college when you fucked that virgin freshman year, she was so overwhelmed with her first sexual sensations that she thought that was IT! When in fact she was just getting started…!

    Point is, if this big masculine guy says he enjoyed it and says he had what he feels is an orgasm, if he has that “we’ve had sex” vibe in his mind, a “that was great let’s make some tea” type post-sex satisfaction, then guess what, that’s his pleasure! That’s his orgasm from anal! Could be completely different from his orgasm from penetrating you or his wife or whoever. This performance could be a totally legitimate and complete orgasm from anal for this particular guy. No problemo.

    Very weird to see this kind of girlie orgasm performance when you are pegging or assfucking, say, a 280lb college football tight end (ha!). But it happens. And it’s all good.

    Your cum is leaking out of his gaping male ass (or if you are a women you have just withdrawn your strap-on from his gaped and raped anal fuck-tract), and this giant physically imposing guy who could break you in half if he wanted is just gently rolling around, cooing like a college virgin from Catholic school having just had her first cunnilingus…! You feel like asking, “Was it good for you”, but you quickly see that he’s going to sleep happy and he will wake up feeling like you and he had great sex! So yes, it’s one of those “Thank you, I left you some money on the night stand” type moments! All good. Just be with it.

    Where does this kind of girlie orgasm come from? Maybe it’s the fact that the prostate is very like the female G-spot, a bundle of sensitive nerves in a primitive gland just in front of the rectum. If you give a woman a G-spot orgasm and watch a guy have a P-spot orgasm, you will be amazed at the similarities. If the guy orgasms like a girl, spurts all over himself and whines in a high pitched squeal, does it mean the guy is a girl, a bitch, a sissy, a femme, a sub? No. All that stuff is in your head. Or his head. Who knows. Assfuck is weird.

    Bear in mind, after his assfuck this same “girlie” ass-gasm guy might wake up and grab you by the waist and spread your butt and fuck your smart ass silly, like a dom. He may BE a dom. A lot of doms get anally needy and when they ask for assfuck it turns out they have these super-girlie orgasms. Don’t ask me why. Maybe since they are doms their ass gets fucked rarely and so they are like anal virgins when they do get fucked… their tract is just not ready for anything big… they cry out and moan like sissies, yet they are doms. Hmmm. Assfuck is weird.

    All of the above is in contrast to what could be equally the result: the guy being assfucked gets hard and stays hard and within 10 minutes roars out his orgasm and ejaculates all over the place exactly the same as when he is the penetrator… and then he grabs you and fucks you hard in the ass until you cum all over yourself…!

    The point is, anal-receptive responsiveness is a spectrum. Be ready to be flexible and to adjust your expectations. Be ready to have to interpret and talk about what your partner feels and wants and what makes him and his ass and cock happy. And don’t hesitate to try different things…!
    Sometimes the guy doesn’t even know what he feels: Every guy is different. You could assfuck or peg a big dominant Type A masculine guy for 40 minutes and when it’s over he will swear on a Bible he didn’t ejaculate. You ask him, did it feel good? He says, yes, it was heavenly. Did you orgasm? Yes, I think so, I felt waves of pleasure and intensity like I have never felt in my life. Did you ejaculate? No, I don’t think so… I never felt myself have that kind of orgasm…!

    Then you make him look down at the sheets and there is a HUGE pool of his manly cum sitting there in a gelatinous mass…! A larger volume of cream than he produces when he is the penetrator or masturbating. You fucked his ass for 40 minutes and your man had no idea that he ejaculated while he was being assfucked! Has no idea whether it happened the moment you entered him, in the middle when he felt what he believes were his biggest waves of pleasure, or at the end. Most likely he ejaculated when he felt those “waves of intensity and pleasure”. So he may just be a guy who cums like a pony but barely realizes it. He may LEARN to realize it and to feel it more, and to identify the feelings that lead up to and associate with ejaculating.

    So it can be just like some men who ejaculate prematurely on their frist time with a woman. They tend to not even feel it coming on, not to be able to control it or enjoy the buildup to when it happens. Your man may have a similar reaction to assfuck, even if he is very good at cock and orgasm control when penetrating you. Assfuck is weird.

    It happens. Next guy you fuck could be a guy who is able to have anal orgasms with full ejaculation after just 5 minutes of assfuck, like clockwork, every time. Like pressing a button marked “Detonate”. And in all of the above there could be no necessary correlation between their fitness level, health, age or whatever. The soft flabby pot-bellied male fatso who by definition has excess estrogen coursing in his veins might get hard, stay hard and cum like a horse and the beefy studly buff gym rat with washboard abs and 4% or less body fat only ever has soft-cock ass-gasms that resemble a coy virgin co-ed at Bible College getting her cunt diddled for the very first time. The male ass is weird!

    Every assfuck is different. Your ass getting fucked could produce a certain sequence of sensations in your body most of the time. Then every so often for no explicable reason you have some other variation on the above, instead, despite all best efforts. Could be the size and proportion and firmness and shape of the cock or dildo or toy in your ass! Ever wonder why there are so many frikkin’ amazing varieties and shapes of ass-toy out there? It’s because every ass is different.
    If you are tired, been sitting a long time, changed your exercise pattern, have just eaten, if your digestion is slow, or you have a full colon (see further below on colon and bowel isses), anal will be different. May not work the same. Time of day, your energy level, stress level, all may play a role in your male anal response to being assfucked. Whatever.

    The point is, if you feel good during and after getting assfucked, that’s what counts. Then all is love. If you feel like you have “had sex”, if you are glowing with sensation and/or tingling, then it doesn’t matter whether your cock was hard or soft or there is or isn’t a pool of your semen somewhere. Did you like it? Does your boodie feel good? Did your partner enjoy pleasuring your ass? Did your partner cum? Whatever your partner did, do you want any of those sensations again? Was your assfuck mainly to please your partner and your ass feels good having been assfucked but you did not really have your own orgasm but are ok with it for now not being a priority because you mainly wanted your partner to orgasm and cum deep in your ass or your girl to cum while pegging you and guess what she did indeed rub herself to a crashing orgasm!? Ok, then! Guess what? You had anal sex! You had a good assfuck! Maybe you could have even better assfuck if you changed things up, tried new techniques, more patience by your partner. Whatever.

    You can LEARN and develop new assfuck skills, new awareness of what your ass likes, and your partner can learn new things also, if there is good communication.

    Post-Assfuck: after assfuck your dick may: stay hard for 30 minutes and allow you to fuck your partner’s ass; or stay semi-hard enough only to fuck your wife’s cunt or mouth, not her ass; go soft immediately and not get hard again for hours; go soft for hours and then suddenly get so hard you need to find something to penetrate quick! It is not unusual for a male who has been nicely assfucked to feel more like being the penetrator for the next day or so, or the rest of the week.

    Assfucking may totally satisfy your libido and sex drive for a few hours or for many days… It may make you horny as hell again within minutes and give you an erection that won’t go down until you masturbate or penetrate your partner.

    Assfuck may be the foreplay that just gets you and your partner started on a extended play-date of sexual congress lasting several hours. Assfuck may be what your girlfriend or gay lover does to you to slow you down for a longer, slow afternoon of sex, so that you linger and don’t cum too quickly a second time. Assfuck may result in markedly lower horniness or markedly increased horniness for several days afterward. If you are markedly hornier it could be for more assfuck or only to penetrate your partner.

    Anal hungers can come in waves. You may have several days in a row or an entire month where all you want is assfuck and then you don’t want or need any assfuck for many days or weeks, and just want to be the penetrator and fuck your partner’s holes.

    Assfuck and Bowel Issues: no one talks about this stuff but it matters. Fecal Matter (FM) matters. I will abbreviate as FM for etiquette’s sake. The anus and rectum and their erotic sensations are connected with and influenced by what is going on in your colon and bowel. Some men have a very satisfying large dump and then experience an “empty” feeling, maybe even an anal or rectal “itch” that needs scratching. They feel they want cock up their ass and they either have to dildo themselves or find their partner for hot anal session. This is normal and all good. The reason is that the large mass of FM had been sitting in your rectum awaiting evacuation and had pressed down on the tissues there, and now that you have evacuated everything is all tingly and feeling sparky. Duh! Everything is still stretched out so there is a lot of room in there and you can easily take cock quite high up. So go for it. Don’t hold back!

    Don’t feel weird or guilty or dirty, this is how the ass works…!
    Point two: if you stick a bunch of lube and an object up your butt, even after a dump, it may stimulate your system to start moving FM down the tract faster. You could start out your assplay feeling empty and then 10 minutes into it you have to tell your partner, hey I think I have to go to the bathroom…! And you take a dump or a partial dump. You go back, put in new lube, start taking cock or dildo up your ass again, and then, damn, more FM is pushing down on its way out. Once you start assplay and find this happening, it could mean several trips to the bathroom…
    Point Three: Pushing a cock or dildo inside you when your tract is trying to push FM out of you is i) painful and uncomfortable, ii) not likely to be pleasurable for either of you, and iii) possibly dangerous. You do NOT want to fight the muscle contractions of the colon or bowel trying to evacuate. They are quite powerful and you are likely to tear or rupture something if you fight them. So interrupt the party, take an intermission, and let yourself or your partner take the time they need to evacuate, before proceeding. Do not be surprised if you have several repeats. Everyone’s digestion, digestive patterns, diet, and digestive health is different. You and your partner have hopefully budgeted time for this…! This is not going to be a quickie…!

    Enemas: the best way to avoid the above situation, and any time you contemplate deep assplay (longer than 6 or at most 8 inches) or prolonged assplay, you should do a fairly thorough enema. Don’t just do one or two bulbfuls of a squeeze bulb type. That may clean the first 8 inches of the tract but could just stimulate a major poop event in the middle of your assplay. If you are going to do the enema thing, may as well do it thoroughly, which means a couple quarts cycled through the colon using a hanging waterbottle type setup. Retain the enema for several minutes if you can, allowing your colon to distribute it up and dissolve FM, before releasing it. This will cleanse your colon which may be a good thing anyway, and will relax you wonderfully. It will generally allow for HOURS of assplay. Good clean fun! Be sure to let all water out. Post-enema your tract may have a slightly more watery environment which can thin out lube and can make your colon a bit astringent, so an insufficiently lubed dildo may tend to “catch” on your tissues, which you don’t want. So you may want to use more lube than otherwise. Or use silicone-based lube which is more expensive but doesn’t break down as quickly when more watery environment is present. Go to town with the lube!

    In General, Go with what your butt tells you! And tell your partner you liked it. They also may have expectations of certain “outcomes” so to speak. It’s all ok. Tell your partner what you like, and what you need, and how you feel about what they are doing to your ass.

    The interplay of ass and rectum and prostate and cock and brain of every man is different.

    The shape and methods and actions and genders and personalities of every possible way to stimulate an ass are all different too! Keep calm, and thrust on!

    Do we want to enjoy this? The prohibition against enjoyment of assfuck… Think of gay porn. Think of the immense quantity of gay porn out there, showing all conceivable sex acts between men. You would think gay porn today would be FULL of images and videos of guys enjoying ass-gasm with full ejaculation from being assfucked…! You would think gay porn would show assfucked guys enjoying orgasm A LOT. But you would be WRONG-O. Images and videos showing assfucked men orgasming are actually quite rare, as a percentage of all gay porn out there. Strange.

    The majority of assfuck scenes in gay porn show the pitcher orgasming but the receiver staying softcock during the assfuck. If the receiver gets an orgasm it may only be after he masturbates or is blown. Think of all the different sex acts shown in gay porn, and the sheer volume of gay porn, and think of the small proportion of this that actually shows the assfuck receiver cumming and ejaculating from being assfucked? Hmmm. Why is this?

    First of all because as stated already, achieving ass-gasm takes more TIME than achieving orgasm from penetration. Mostly that means LOTS more time, as in HOURS…! Guess what, time is money, and porn producers by and large aren’t in the business of funding sensitive HOURS-LONG fuck sessions just to capture the sub having an ass-asm… You could argue, “hey they don’t have to film for hours the actual ass-gasm scene can be filmed and the ass-gasm shown to occur almost immediately after the orgasm from penetration” True, but remember, the producer has to have actors, guys on the set, camera crew, sweaty lights all there for HOURS, waiting to capture the much more elusive, unpredictable and difficult-to-achieve ass-gasm of the sub. Very expensive. NOT GOING TO FRIKKIN’ HAPPEN. So they mostly take the attitude of “fuck the sub and his ass-gasm!”

    Second reason is simpler: the culture of assfuck generally and the culture of all male dominant porn generally is focused on the penetrator and his orgasm, rather than the orgasm of the receiver. Whether women or men are the receiver. In straight porn, a woman’s orgasm is very hard to film since, well, there is usually not spurting or outward event. There is sighing and writhing, and facial expressions. But a male having orgasm from assfuck SHOULD BE easier to film and this there should be LOTS of images of this. But porn is mostly geared to show sex from a male penetrator’s perspective. Hence the fixation on the penetrator’s money shot.

    Thirdly, in some porn and kink stereotypes the receiver ISN’T SUPPOSED TO ENJOY THE ASSFUCK! Hey, it’s S&M, its BDSM, and anal-receptive sex is SUPPOSED to be degrading, demeaning, feminizing sissy-making and painful. Its all about the pleasure of the Master or Dom, not the pleasure of the slave or sub. The attitude here is quite consciously: fuck the slave or sub and his pleasure!

    Fourthly, men who are penetrators are generally scripted as pigs (or stereotypically are portrayed as pigs), who fuck a hole only until they have THEIR nut, to express THEIR power and dominance. They are thus not concerned with the pleasure of their partner, whether male or female. Indeed in much of our culture it is considered WEAK and UNMANLY and UNMASCULINE and UNPOWERFUL to be concerned with whether the woman or the man whose ass you have just filled with jism has enjoyed it or has actually orgasmed. Your claim to masculine fame is that you fucked the hole for 5 minutes and filled it with cum. Wow. What a stud! What a stallion!

    Surprise, surprise, there is a strong prohibition in our society against admitting to enjoying being penetrated. In most repressive religious traditions women are not supposed to ENJOY sex they are supposed to ENDURE it, mainly for procreation, and in such religions men are ABSOLUTELY prohibited from enjoying being penetrated… In these same cultures of course we know that men get penetrated all the time but if they are ever represented as ENJOYING it they are somehow thought of as more gay or contemptible than if they are in pain and miserable and complaining… Admitting to liking being assfucked is the biggest taboo…!

    So all of the above is of course bullshit old-style thinking about what is male and masculine and manly and powerful, and what sex should be about. But it still persists to a large degree.

    What is interesting about the emerging pegging culture in straight couples is that women as penetrators are naturally inclined toward being patient and slow, enjoying longer sex encounters, and taking the time to assure their partner is enjoying the assfuck. Thus, pegging culture to some degree is more open to male anal-receptive pleasure. That is quite radical actually. It says that males can and should enjoy being assfucked by their women. It says that a male can indeed enjoy penetration from being assfucked while remaining MALE, MASCULINE, STRAIGHT, and POWERFUL. Wow. Coolness. We have come out of the Dark Ages…!

    Questions: is it always demeaning to be penetrated in the ass? Must it always be a sign of submission or submissiveness? Must it be a sign of abdication of power and masculinity? Is it always “gay” to have anal pleasure? Hmmmm. Questions. Much to discuss…

    Assfuck in the History of Power and Culture – Almost no one except classical scholars knows or talks about any of the following, so I provide this as a courtesy to those trying to figure out their own or their partner’s assfuck needs.

    We live today under color of Judeo-Christian religions and morals, which are anti-sexual and even more strongly anti-sodomitical. These religions teach that the entire act of sex is in some way an original sin, and that sexual activity with the anus and rectum is possibly as evil as the Devil himself.

    This is all total hogwash. If we wind the clock back further to Greece and Rome, which were democratic societies (though not nearly as we define democracy today) then we see a different view of anal sex and sex generally, though not without its own strange prohibitions and taboos.

    I’m sorry for this wall of text but I couldn’t think of an easier way to make this information available to the membership as it is no longer available from the original sources I had access to. The following was taken, also several years ago, from the website -> http://www.tease-n-please.com/ProstateMassageMilking.html, which, unfortunately, is also no longer in existence. I copied it because it contains some insightful information which users of this forum may also find helpful. Again, I don’t have the authors name to give proper credit but if anyone knows please let me know and I’ll credit them appropriately.

    “Prostate Massage”


    No matter what motivations or desired outcomes brings people to this practice, the basic facts of the male physiology don’t change.

    Three male reproductive organs are directly involved in the technique of prostate massage and milking, the prostate gland, the seminal vesicles, and Cowper’s (bulbourethral) gland.

    The testes produce sperm on a more or less steady basis. It takes 74 days for them to mature to a point where they could be useful in reproduction. They are stored in the epididymis while they mature. The epididymis is a tube-like structure attached to the outside of the ball or testicle, though both are inside the sack and not visible. If the sperm are not used after maturity they are absorbed back into the body.

    Contrary to popular belief, they are not constantly building up with no place to go if there is no ejaculation, drainage or other discharge. Even though there are tens of millions of sperm in a typical ejaculate, they only contribute 2% – 5% of the volume.

    During sexual arousal blood and lymph engorge the penis, scrotal area and the prostate, all of which may be noticed in varying degrees based on the level of arousal. During this arousal three other components of the ejaculate are produced. The prostate gland produces a small amount of alkaline fluid to counteract the acidity of the vagina and protect the sperm. This accounts for about 30% of the ejaculate and is the origin of the bitter taste sometimes experienced. The bulbourethral gland secretes a small amount of clear lubricating liquid (sometimes seen before ejaculation as “precum”) to help speed the ejaculate along the urethra. Usually this is only about 5% of the ejaculate, but prolonged stimulation without ejaculation can cause more to be produced and even expelled. The largest component of the ejaculate (60% or more by volume), the milky semen, is produced in the seminal vesicles. This liquid is actually a fructose sugar based substance to nourish the sperm. This would suggest that the ejaculate might have a sweet taste if the prostate’s alkaline contribution could be reduced or neutralized with a tasteless base (as in opposite of acidic) substance.

    During sexual arousal, sperm and ejaculatory fluid accumulate in these glands backing up behind valves in the ejaculatory ducts. When fluid pressure is high enough the valves open and the urethral bulb fills, triggering the ejaculatory reflex and muscular contractions of orgasm, which empties the glands.

    If there is no ejaculation or other emptying of these glands, all of the ejaculate is reabsorbed into the body. Again, there is no buildup of fluid except during arousal. Mere denial of sexual relief (without arousal) does not create an urgent physical need to ejaculate or empty these glands. Nor is there any physical basis for saying that longer denial alone produces greater need or desire for ejaculation. All of these effects are psychological, and are powerfully contributed to by repeated states of arousal without relief.


    The basis for orgasm control/denial is founded, in part, on the idea that while the male is interested in pursuing sexual release he will be more solicitous of the lady’s pleasure, and in general more amenable to various services for her. For some, an additional motive is that more time between his releases will make them more powerful and pleasurable. However, the truth is that these effects are a complex mix of psychological and physiological effects, created by repeated “teasings” or other arousal which engage his desires and build at an emotional level.

    After an ejaculatory orgasm, complete with all of the other physical and emotional aspects, there is a physical refractory period during which the body does not respond to sexual arousal. This period is usually shorter in younger men and longer in older ones. Psychologically too, immediately after orgasm men are not often thinking about the next sexual release. Some have taken this fact and made a bit more of it than the data actually support. Consequently there is a great deal of advice centered around using “milkings” instead of full orgasm to keep him in that state of desiring sexual release. It should be noted that there is nothing in this “physical downtime” that prevents him from focusing his actions on the lady’s pleasures.

    Whether or not a couple wishes to employ total orgasm denial for the male is a personal one. The reasons for this choice are varied and depend on many factors of their particular relationship and individual psychology. However, if the primary reason is to avoid a period in which he is not interested in sexual release (and supposedly less interested in serving her) then it is not necessary to completely avoid the full orgasm. Total denial would “make sense” only if his service to her was based exclusively on his own sexual arousal and satisfaction, and if his sexual desire did not return quickly.

    The physical refractory period is relatively short, and skillful use of teasings and other arousal can quickly re-engage the male. In fact, many of the websites advocating the use of chastity devices for the male and long or permanent denial of orgasm cite (possibly questionable) statistics about the rate of male masturbation. These statistics by themselves should demonstrate that many males, on their own, quickly re-engage in the desire for the next sexual release. Therefore making complete denial in order to maintain a high degree of sexual desire (and desire to serve her) unnecessary.

    Mere denial does not produce increased need or desire for sexual release unless there is an emotional/psychological element. In fact, denial in the absence of sexual opportunity or surroundings more often results in a loss of interest. Consequently, when the desired benefits of orgasm control include building and focusing sexual energy, there must be fairly constant focus on the potential of sexual release, usually best accomplished with regular teasing and arousal.

    Even though the fluids created during arousal are reabsorbed if not discharged, such repeated engorgements, and build up of pressure prior to what would be an ejaculation may cause some irritation and swelling of the prostate. This condition is called prostatitis. This is likely the origin of the idea that the fluids are constantly building if there is no release. In any event, orgasmic release or prostate massage or milking can temporarily reduce this effect. Remember that engorgement of the prostate is an effect of (not the cause of) increased sexual desire. Likewise, engorgement of the scrotum (which can result from arousal that does not necessarily involve an erection) can cause tenderness or even aching, often known as “blue balls”. Orgasm generally will immediately remove or reduce this pain. How much relief may be obtained with prostate massage varies. Attempting to lift a heavy object, causing a tightening of the muscles behind the scrotum may also provide some temporary relief.

    Prostate massage does not provide the ejaculatory muscles with the same exercise as an orgasm, and long periods without orgasm weakens those muscles. Initially this is noted as dribbled or very short distance ejaculation when full orgasm is allowed. More prolonged periods could see further deterioration of the muscle strength. After extreme lengths of time without full ejaculation the muscles may not be able to recover full strength. This is called muscle atrophy.

    Another common misconception is that the body takes care of too much denial or too little exercise of the ejaculatory muscles through nocturnal emissions, so called “wet dreams”. The process through which this happens is complex and related to many other things. Predicting when or if it will happen is just not possible. Saying that this relief is the purpose of nocturnal emissions is truly a leap beyond the facts. A few things are certain; there are very few men past adolescence who have nocturnal emissions (regardless of their sexual frequency or lack of it), there are some who have never had any at all (even during adolescence), and there are men with weakened ejaculatory response from prolonged orgasm denial. These facts alone prove that nocturnal emissions do not reliably solve the physical problems or effects mentioned above.

    Finally, there is a process called homeostasis, which essentially is just a way of saying the body tries to maintain all functions and processes in a balanced manner. Over time the body “learns” after repeated edgings without orgasm, that there will be no expelling of ejaculate, and consequently produces less. Taking a break from these orgasm denial activities from time to time, can “reset” the body’s mechanisms. In turn, this makes the next round almost as exciting and challenging as when first started.


    When the prostate gland is engorged it can be felt from the outside by pressing a finger into the middle of the perineum, between the back of the scrotum and the anus. It is a rounded lump about the size of a large marble or golf ball. It can also be accessed via the rectum, where it can be felt as a rounded lump toward the front of the body and just about an index finger’s length inside the rectum. A better way to find it from the rectum is to insert the middle finger, and slide it from just inside the rectum (on the front side) up and in until you feel it move over a lump. That will be the prostate. Just in back of (up from) the prostate is a smaller and roughly triangular wedge shaped structure that is the bottom portion of the seminal vesicles, which is where most of the fluid of the ejaculate is produced and accumulated. Underneath the seminal vesicles are the ampulla.

    The seminal vesicles, ampulla and prostate can also be emptied by massage of these glands through the rectum. Rhythmically massaging the organs in an in-and-out motion with an anal dildo is one way, but perhaps a more reliable way is to simply use either the middle finger or the middle finger and index finger together (well lubricated), to apply a firm slow massage over the glands inside the rectum. The massage will force the seminal fluid and sperm past the valves in the ejaculatory ducts. See Figure 2 below for motions from the outside of the gland toward the middle, as well as finger placement in rectum.

    Once ejaculate appears at the mouth of the penis, it will help to empty the urethra by running a finger firmly up the underside of the penis from the root to the head, pushing the ejaculate in front of it. Usually only a few drops of liquid will be expelled, unless there was significant sexual arousal, enough to cause the production of ejaculate to be stored in the seminal vesicles, just before the procedure.

    Despite personal stories relating volume to length of denial, a careful reading of these accounts and/or questioning of the participants always reveals that large amounts of fluid are only obtained when the procedure follows arousal. The length of arousal or number of “edgings” (getting very close to orgasm) most reliably predicts the amount of ejaculate extracted.

    Light or gentle touch of the prostate through the rectum, or for that matter of the anus itself, is usually perceived as erotic and pleasurable. This has lead some to refer to the prostate as the male “G spot”. However, enough pressure on the prostate and seminal vesicles to expel fluids is most often felt as discomfort, if not actual pain, at least until the male eroticizes this contact. Individual responses, of course, do vary.

    Prostate massage, with or without prior sexual arousal, does have the effect of relieving some of the swelling of prostatitis.

    When this procedure is used as part of orgasm control games, a basic question needs to be answered: is it intended to be pleasurable for the male? If it is to be pleasurable, the possibilities range from a full orgasm aided and enhanced with prostate and penile stimulation, down to what is often called the “ruined orgasm” where stimulation is suddenly halted at the first sign of ejaculate, which usually means the resulting orgasm has less force. This is often considered psychologically less satisfying by the male. If penile stimulation is stopped for a brief time before the prostate massage begins (allowing arousal to drop back a bit) draining of the ejaculate will not trigger orgasm, even though a similar amount of ejaculate may be collected.


    From the above it should now be clear that in orgasm control/denial play the physiological “need” for either orgasm or milkings is mostly to avoid potential prostatitis induced from the repeated arousals without release. Since this depends entirely on the frequency and degree of arousal, as well as individual response, which is different for each man, no definite schedule for everyone can be created. This physical “need” (the prostatitis) may have no symptoms at all, and is not perceived directly as increased sexual desire, though some men may detect symptoms of “fullness” and need to urinate, and eroticize those feelings which in turn, give rise to desire for sexual release.

    It is also important to remember that weakening of ejaculatory muscles, as well as loss of ejaculate volume, is a very real and likely result of extended periods without ejaculation.

    Even though there is no continuous build up of ejaculate causing increased interest in sexual release, it is important to remember that sexual arousal is at least as much a “mind game” as it is a matter of physiology. Such references during play may enhance the arousal of the male. Our point is just don’t get carried away with taking them literally and making decisions about the form and character of play based on inaccurate information.

    Persistent difficulty in urinating, or painful urination, especially when it occurs days after a milking or release should be reason to consult a physician.

    For prostate only stimulation, orgasms tend to be dry, but not always.
    Multiple orgasms are possible and there is no refractory period if there is no ejaculation.
    Prostate milking and prostate orgasms are not the same thing. With prostate milking, the penis tends to be flaccid and fluid comes out without an orgasm.
    Combined penis stimulation and prostate stimulation results in a normal, but usually much more intense orgasm with ejaculation.
    You can massage the prostate externally and achieve orgasm, but it’s more difficult as it requires a lot of pressure on the perianal region.
    It can take practice to “learn” to have prostate orgasms. Sometimes it takes an hour, sometimes it takes 5 minutes. Reported times vary a lot!
    There tends to be a substantial, long-lasting afterglow post-prostate orgasm(s), especially after a long session. This is contrasted with “normal” orgasms, where after ejaculation, any sexual interest goes to zero.
    Most people seem find it very enjoyable, but were initially very hesitant to try it.
    The feeling of the orgasm itself is different from an orgasm from penis-only stimulation.
    People seem to prefer finishing off a session with ejaculation. After extended prostate stimulation, there is usually a lot of ejaculate in the final orgasm. I quote, from the link at the start of this post, “Get ready to clean up, because the amount of cum that will come out is unbelievable.“
    Experiences vary a lot from person to person. Some people have prostate orgasms easily, some don’t. Some ejaculate every time, and some never ejaculate at all. Intensity of feelings varies. Time taken to achieve orgasm varies. Some never succeed in having orgasms purely through prostate stimulation.

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