This Blog is in multiple Sections : Part II is my periodic blog of experiences (most recent at the top), Part I (this one) is just copies of some of my earliest Forum entries (oldest at the bottom)
12/17/07 : I read in the newspaper today about the death of singer-songwriter Dan Fogelberg at the age of 56 due to advanced prostate cancer, boy did that bring a twinge of pain to my heart. He was an artist that I grew up listening to with a gentle thoughtful style I regularly enjoyed. It certainly gives me pause to think how fortunate I am that my own cancer was detected early enough for effective treatment to commence. I now have a very good prospect of becoming a long lived cancer survivor. To any of you guys who may read this blog entry, I strongly urge you to begin getting yearly PSA tests (especially if you are over the age of 50)to monitor for potential prostate cancer. It is a simple blood test, I would never have discovered my own cancer were it not for that finding of an increasing PSA level. Hopefully, upon conclusion of my own treatments, I can get back to enjoying the wonderful Aneros journey I began back in April.
12/14/07 : I finished week 2 of my treatments today, so far so good, I have no side effects to report about other than some afternoon fatigue beginning to occur. I have really appreciated the cheerfulness of the medical staff at the treatment facility, their positive attitudes are an invaluable aid in combating the depressing scenario so many cancer patients are forced to deal with. I almost feel fortunate that my cancer is so small and not life threatening that it can be relatively easily to deal with compared to some others receiving treatment for far more serious conditions. It does give me pause to be thankful for the limited level of involvement of cancer in my own case.
12/07/07 : Well I finished the 4th radiation treatment (of 38 total) today. My doctor tells me that the first two weeks of treatments are usually well tolerated with no side effects. Nothing really to report, other than the actual treatment does not take very long (15 minutes), this big imposing x-ray machine rotates around your body where it stops at six different positions to shoot its beams through you. They have the prostate targeted at the center of rotation so that at each 60 degree rotation the prostate is always getting nuked but other body parts only receive 1/6 of the radiation dosage to minimize collateral damage. Despite this technique it is likely that the bladder and rectum will also suffer more damage just because of their close proximity to the prostate.
11/27/07 : Here’s my update to my cancer treatment. I had the consultation with my radiation/oncologist doctor, who reiterated my treatment options, prognosis, side effects, etc. Yesterday, I went in for preparatory screening in the CT machine, where they take pre-treatment image scans, tattoo 3 registration marks and inject some dye through the penis into the bladder to enhance the imaging characteristics. The nurse who performed the latter was not very gentle and managed to create a small tear at the urethral opening in the process so now I have a bruised ego and a bruised and bloody dick too. The actual radiation treatments begin next Monday (12/05/07), 5 days per week except for the holidays, currently I am scheduled to receive 38 treatments running through till the end of January.
11/21/07 : I have made some additional alterations to my HELIX recently, I ground down, sanded and buffed it at the neck to more closely resemble the taper of the MGX model. The action is now dramatically different, but I am not sure if it is better or worse. It now more readily induces involuntary anal contractions, but it does not now move as readily with those contractions. The movement is less but the frequency is greater, the net effect is close to balanced, although I am really enjoying the increased induced contractions, as I can already tell that my PC muscles are gaining added strength and I am feeling the anal sphincter muscle less.
9/14/07 : I had a good session today. I have been abstaining from ejaculating for more than 2 weeks to test the effect on my arousal capabilities. After doing the normal rectal flush, lubing up and inserting my Progasm, I proceeded to read some erotica on-line, I had already decided that this was going to be my “release” day, as I was starting to get a little anxious and irritable without having ejaculated for that length of time.
I proceeded to do some edging while reading and found that as long as I stayed below the “point of no return”, I was able to generate some nice P-waves and was able to ‘milk’ my prostate by applying voluntary contractions. I took myself to the edge about 6 times over the course of 45 minutes and was able to ‘milk’ out about as much cum as I would in a traditional penile orgasm. I finally couldn’t stand not experiencing that “release” that a full ejaculation affords and went for it. When I orgasmed and ejaculated (producing a normal amount of cum), I had the strange realization that though it was a satisfying orgasm, it was not as intense as a dry-O I had experienced the day before.
I believe this experience has taught me two things. First, my rejuvenation cycle for ejaculation is on the order of 8-10 days for optimum arousal. The longer I go past that point does not really increase my desire or arousal quotient, while I stay ‘horny’, my mood becomes somewhat depressed and I just become more irritable.
Secondly, I now prefer the dry-O experience to the more traditional penile based orgasm/ejaculation (O/E) model for several reasons. Experiencing dry-O’s means no messy cum to deal with, it is possible to experience a series of them (MMO’s), a dry-O can last several times longer than the paltry 15-30 seconds of a traditional O/E, the orgasmic pleasure waves generated are more intense and more of my body becomes involved in the event and I still feel energized to continue experiencing them since no ejaculatory “release” has occurred.
I can now see some real effects of the “re-wiring” process. My pelvic floor muscles have definitely improved their tone and stamina. My psychological outlook has elevated the dry-O to a higher status above a traditional O/E. I may now start considering a traditional O/E as more like body maintenance for proper health, flushing out the system on a regular basis, while enjoyable, just isn’t the same experience as before embarking upon the Aneros learning journey.
8/15/07 : I had another good session today, I did some warm up activities with my Helix in place, I read some erotica and did mild contractions while sitting in a chair at my computer. I was feeling pretty aroused, it’s been 6 days since my last ejaculation, after about an hour I switched out the Helix for the Progasm, within 10 minutes I was experiencing a series of mini-O’s with mild lower body convulsions, after another 10 minutes the orgasmic feelings increased slighly and then remained relatively stable for more than a half hour, during which I experienced about 2-3 dry-O’s (not as intense as reported in my previous post), but the underlying pleasure waves were just as good as my previous post. I have noticed that even though I empty my bladder before each session, as I get further into a session and my bladder starts to fill up that pleasurable sensation like the urge to urinate increases intensity. I will need to test whether having a fuller bladder at the beginning of a session hastens the onset of the pleasure waves by having the bladder also sending signals to the brain. I also need to test effects by insuring that the bladder remains empty by not drinking liquids for several hours before a session.
7/26/07 : I had a minor breakthrough yesterday (7/25/07), after abstaining from ejaculating for more than a week (confirming the amp up in arousal theory), I had an Aneros session with my newly acquired Progasm, I experienced about a half dozen dry-O’s with lower body convulsions, within about an hour, while reading some on-line erotica. Wow, it was very nice, indeed. I hope to repeat the experience soon.
7/13/07 : It has been about 2 weeks now since my semen has cleared up and I have resumed using my Aneros devices. I notice that I am not getting the same level of pleasurable sensations now as I had before the biopsy, in fact sensations are remarkably decreased. I don’t know if this is because of the actual physical trauma to my prostate by the biopsy needles or whether this is caused by my own emotional state and anxiety over the cancer diagnosis. I suspect the latter, as ones psyche really must be in tune to allow the super-O feelings to manifest themselves. The more reading that I’ve done on therapy options has me pretty convinced that the external beam radiation therapy is the route I will take for treatment. It is becoming a more precise procedure due to the use of computer aided imaging, this is reducing incidences of neighboring tissues and organs being severely damaged by the radiation. Hopefully as my mind comes to terms with the impending treatments I’ll be able to once again enter the O-zone of experience.
6/18/2007, I met with my urologist and he discussed the treatment options that are generally available : 1.) the do nothing or “watchful waiting” process of just monitoring the diseases progress until more aggressive treatment is needed. 2.) Surgery to completely remove the prostate (radical prostatectomy). 3.) Radiation therapy using either radioactive ‘seeds’ or external beam radiation.4.) Chemotherapy. His opinion was that chemotherapy and watchful waiting were not appropriate for my particular case, thus the choice for me now is surgery or radiation.
I am leaning toward external beam radiation as that is the least invasive procedure.
06/08/07, Well the doctor called back today with results of my biopsy. It has been confirmed that I have prostate cancer. He is going to have his medical assistant call back next week to schedule a consultation to discuss treatment options. This is depressing news to be sure, but at least now I know something, which is better than waiting around worrying with uncertainty. After effects of the biopsy – still have blood in my semen, but I am generally feeling I’m approaching normalcy with respect to my lower abdominal area.
5/30/07, The blood in my urine cleared up in about 3 days, I waited a week before trying masturbating. Yech, I experienced the same thing ‘darwin’ experienced, namely, my ejaculate looked like chocolate syrup with all the blood in it. I will try again in a couple of days, the doctor said it could take 2-4 weeks to clear up, I hope it is on the 2 week side so I can reinstate some Aneros sessions. I am of the opinion that regular discharge of semen from the prostate is a good healthy thing to be doing, rather than having blood contaminated semen just setting in the prostate gland itself. My orgasm/ejaculation, while satisfying, was not as intense as normal and lacked much ejaculatory energy, more dribble than squirt. Additionally, I noticed an ever so slight burning sensation in my urethra afterwards, the sensation gradually diminished and went away after I had a full bladder evacuation.
UPDATE : May 22, 2007, Well I had the biopsy procedure done today, it wasn’t nearly as bad as I had made it in my mind. I will get results in 10-11 days. I discussed the usage of the prostate massager with my doctor, he gave me the semi-official hospital stance, namely, the hospital does not perform prostate massage as a medical proceedure because official studies have not found the procedure to be particularily beneficial to prostate health, as such, they do not recommend or dissuade their patients from privately employing the procedure either through manual manipulation or via legally available commercial devices. In other words they allow the user to make his own choice. He did, however, recommend that I refrain from any prostate stimulation until the trauma from the biopsy was completely healed, he said that I would know it was healed when I had no more traces of blood in my urine or ejaculate (probably 3-4 weeks). I’ll update this thread when I get the results of the biopsy back.
Thanks Guys for the feedback from my original post