This is going to just be speaking tonight. I had a good session last night. All my sessions are good. I have been teaching and helping a few guys out and I am really progressing on my journey. But I can't get my dad's situation out of head.
Two days ago while we were watching tv with mom he kind of was hinting that he had to tell me something. I'm like ok with a calm face. But on the inside I'm kind of excited cause he's going to tell me he bought a Aneros and that he needs my help. But no. As my mom went for a bathroom break he leaned down from the couch (i was on the floor) and said I heard you last night while you were riding. Why is is so interested in my rides when I know he's having some of his self.
I wanted to front him out right there but mom was coming back from the bathroom. I was waiting for the movie to end so I could have a one on one conversation with him but he rapidly went to sleep after. I needed to speak with him. Since I know he goes to work super early I thought I'll catch him then. I woke up at 5 while he was in the shower and made coffee. As I waited for him I was trying to figure out what to say. As I'm so rapped up in my thought my dad comes rushing down the stairs. HE's startled to see me. He says his good morning and gets him a cup of joe.
I stand there dry mouth nervous to start the conversation. So I just spit it out. "Why are you always listening to my sessions?". He just stares at me. He tries to make a joke saying well you be so loud I thought it was a murder in progress. I didn't laugh. I know I shouldn't pressure him but its starting to aggravate me. I know and he don't know I know. So I ask him do you listen to my full sessions and he didn't give me a answer. he tried to brush the question off by saying he was running late for work.
No way. He was going to tell me. But I saw the desperation in his eyes to say something but the pride and weirdness kept him quiet once again. So I just hugged him. I gave him a hug to reassure that nothing is wrong with him. I didn't say a word. I just gave him a hug a hug to say I know and it's fine and when ever you need me I'm here. He looked at me said thank you and left. Hopefully that helped. I will know this weekend. My mom is going out of town to visit my aunt her sister so it will be just the boys.