I am lost.

Welcome to the Forum! Troubleshooting this thing is not easy because there are so many different parameters, and you can't be expected to describe 6 years of experience in all details so getting the "big picture" or "portrait global de la situation" is not an easy task. 

Unless you are really tall, all models *should* hit the prostate in some way. Have you ever successfully stimulated your prostate in other ways, with dildos, fingers and such? I think your main roadblock is that you're not feeling much so can't build on it, so finding a way to get some pleasure started looks like objective #1. What's your session frequency and duration on average? 

Have you tried switching to A-Less for a while?

Are you watching a lot of porn? 

Thank you for your answers

I am not that tall, 175 Cm, i consider myself as tall as "the average" 

I tried quickly with fingers or other plugs, but not truly feling a lot on the prostate, but i still managed to get few sessions with pleasure and rare ones with intense prostate pleasure, so i know it's possible, but not always happening, specially these last weeks. The only thing i realized was that the Progasm was directly hitting the prostate, and quite stronger than the helix, but also being a bit uncomfortable to wear, i tried a session with just him, but he wasn't getting "completely" inside, and so i believe not hitting the spot, but i've been shocked to see the obvious different about feeling the prostate being hit with the progasm than helix or eupho..

I try to do sessions when i do feel like it and have the calm and moment to, usually between 1 and 3 sessions per week, lasting between 45min and 1h30, if i do feel good sensations.

I tried a bit a A-less, not sessions like usually without aneros, but contracting a bit while in the bath, or sitting, it does make me feel bit of pleasure, and generally making me wanting to feel more, and so chaining on a session with aneros if i can

And yes and no, i am watching porn, sometimes before to "build me up" but never in a session, i try to stay focused on my sensations and relaxation, even if i noticed last time that thinking of something was making my body doing some contractions for some reason .. But not always giving pleasure

Hi and welcome to the forum.

I imagine that you already know the French website dedicated to prostate stimulation? Nouveauxplaisirs.fr ?

In everything you wrote you didn’t mention whether you had spent time doing the following, to get properly aroused before and during sessions:

-body stimulation (nipples, etc)

-fantasizing

-Other arousal building methods such as Hypnosis

-Moaning

-listening to accompanying tracks, ASMR, music, etc

-edging ahead of time

-semen retention

Hello !

Yes i am aware of this site, and i did post here as well for few years, i had some suggestions and help, but i feel like against a wall and despite the advices i could get from here i still remain stuck, this is why i'm also tying my chance here as well, maybe the point of view on certain things are different, and could help.

There is indeed many points to talk about, so here is the list of the points you mentionned : 

-body stimulation : I'm not much for that, this is a positive feeling but not extraordinary for me, i usually remain calm and not trying to move at all, to relax my body as much as i can

-fantasizing : I try to not think usually, avoiding mental parasites or such, but as i mentionned, last time actually thinking of something (not even sexual or anything) made my body making contractions, soooo ... I'll have to experiment this again

-Other arousal building methods such as Hypnosis (And listening to accompanying tracks, ASMR, music) : As i usually prefer remaining into silent and calm, i never listen to anything or such as soon as i begin a session, and i don't think there's anything existing for prostate stimulation orgasm in French

-Moaning : When i do feel good pleasure, which isn't always, i don't restrain myself, because it's more like a reflex of the pleasure rather than a forced moaning

-edging ahead of time : Well there is actually something i did think about, what about if you masturbate normally until feeling the point of non return and stopping, before starting the prostate stimulation session with no longer penial stimulation ? Reaching the edge made me think of inflating the prostate, making it maybe more sensitive, but i'm not sure about this, i should experiment it again as well

-semen retention : I tried once to not ejaculate for about 3-5 days, my sessions were a bit more intense, but no "real" progress or spontaneous change or evolving ..

Now that i said this, i know i have few things to experiment again, trying to masturbate before a session to grow the excitation and prostate, and see if using my mental would make my body going in the right direction.

@rodward

Hi rodward,

If you know NXPL, I’m sure you have downloaded and read (several times) le Traité d’Aneros. I remember that I was once feeling like you and I decided to read again le Traité and to apply exactly what was written. My next session was really better.

What did a change for me and made me progress was:

• Finding the right lube. For me it’s the organic Shea butter.
• Nipple play. This is really what I use to control and modulate my orgasms.
• Vaping some weed. I know it’s illegal in France and also in my country, but...

I hope you will make significant progress in the future, I’m sure it will work better one day. Have a nice journey.

Yes, i did read it multiples times, and i recently rode again the english one in the learning center ,and few things are different

I tried Shea butter, but it doesn't seem to lube that much for me, maybe i need to use an organic one rather than a more common one

Nipples .. I can try, but it's not my best feeling for that, but i can sure try

And week / drugs .. I don't have any, i'm trying to not smoke, take drugs or psychotic, i try to stay naturam, but thanks ^^

I really really recommend spending time getting to know your body, starting with your nipples. Many users on this forum diddle their nipples with good results. And you don’t need to be restrained to your nipples, you can also stimulate your entire breasts or any other part of your body. If they don’t give you much pleasure in the beginning, keep doing it and you will see that through practice you will get more and more pleasure.  You can even practice just playing with your nipples outside of prostate play, and maybe you will discover nipple orgasms. I think that ignoring your nipples is just like ignoring your prostate, and the two go hand in hand.

As for semen retention, I recommend that you experiment with two to seven days of semen retention regularly. You can even go for longer if you are able to. Semen retention helps a lot of us out with arousal for reasons I don’t understand.

From my own personal experience, I recommend edging the day of or even every day leading up to a session (or multiple times a day). This intensifies the effects of semen retention, contributing to arousal. I don’t do it right before an aneros session though, because I will then be too penis-focused.

@morexp you’re French... Canadian?

I can understand your frustration. My experience with Aneros goes back over 10 years. I have the Peridise, Helix and Program original. I am in my mid 60s, and have issues with my lower spine nerve wise.  It took about 3 years for my nerves to start to wake up, and once they started to get active, every use of the Aneros massager, the experience improves. The challenge is everyone is different, and makes progress at different rates. My suggestion is to have a routine, and continue to learn about each muscle group. I will watch porn, while doing slow Kegel contractions, and with my free hands, the right fingers on my left nipple, and left fingers on my right nipple, and my prostate is alive, each time is an improvement over the last. Once the sensations of pleasure start, I work to prolong them, and feel the joy.  I don't know how many times I gave up for a month or 6 weeks, I always come back to the Forum, read learn, and then go and get back to training my prostate and all those nerves,  it is rare that I can't recognize that I am making the progress to a total body experience. 

I'm exceptionally tall - 203cm. I used Helix for a few years and ultimately abandoned it in favor of Progasm Ice. I had to strain quite a bit for the Helix Classic to make contact, and even then it was light. Progasm felt like not much for the first few sessions, but really took off in doggy position. You have gravity on your side. I use positions where Progasm performs drive-by attacks, glides over my prostate, rather than hitting it head-on. That's too uncomfortable and you need precise kegel contractions to avoid hitting too hard.

I had a very similar experience to you overall - it took me a lot of time to make it work. In the end, I found that the position and the toy make the biggest difference, along with a serious enema. You want to feel very smooth inside.

With Helix especially, I found the best positions are with with knees far apart (but this tends to kill hip joints, trust me) or with knees bent and about 120 degree angle between my thighs and my body core. I have much better pleasure when I arch my back, and this is more comfortable if I rest my back against a wall, bed, or wardrobe. I can make a photo in a few days if you're interested. It's surprising, but the position of your legs, and position of your UPPER back, affect the ability to hit prostate a lot. Also, try breathing from your belly.

I'm having an unvoluntary break from Aneros. It's been a few months since I last used it. I don't have a lot of private time for full relaxation. For the time being I'm using a curved steel dildo with orbs on both ends - one smaller, one bigger. Because of its weight I can only use it comfortably on my back, but it's mindblowing once you figure out the best positions (there aren't that many). A dildo is interesting because it removes one variable from the picture. Contracting Kegel muscles shifts prostate position a bit. Yesterday I had an incredible session and afterwards had a h.a.r.d, veiny erection almost like in my teens (I'm relatively young at 37 but I suffer from depression and anxiety since high school at least, so this is a big deal for me). See, I no longer care if I ever have a prostate orgasm. Just edging like this feels divine.

Either way my experience is that thorough enema is more important than good lube. If you're extensively emptied down there, you need little lube. More lube only helps up to a point. I'm a fan of silicone lube and I only re-lube if I start feeling friction inside. My sessions last for 60-90 minutes.

With aneros, I found that using it daily is too much and I gradually become less sensitive. Most people need a few days of rest between. I don't seem to need those days of rest with the dildo. I'm still researching this and I will post an update once I know for sure.

A counter-intuitive thing with prostate massage is that going harder or faster is usually bad and doesn't get you closer to orgasm. Even if you don't painfully poke your prostate, it just becomes less sensitive (gets tired?). Once you start feeling something, keep doing it for a few minutes. The feeling should get stronger. Only change position if you stop feeling new things. Rhythm and speed is key. If you're making slower, gentler movements, it's easier to pinpoint the location. The first contact is nothing spectacular, you just feel something strange. After the first contact, you will find that sensations become stronger on a per-day basis. Apparently the rewiring thing is making semi-permanent changes in your brain (you lose progress pretty quickly if you stop having sessions).

If you NAIL the position - fantasies, vocalisations, meditation, sleep quality don't matter THAT much! They do help, but I only practice semen retention (because not cumming makes me more horny and I like that). Aside from that, I do edging, watch some porn etc and I still get amazing prostate massage sessions. On the contrary - prostate massage CALMS me, temporarily slows my reaction time (I notice that in skill-based video games very much), makes me VERY relaxed. Just give me some privacy and I forget about the world. I say don't bother with nipple stimulation etc until you feel you want it. Massaging the correct spot makes you WANT to do these things. In my opinion starting with these is putting the cart in front of the horse.

One last thing - many people use kegel muscles and sphincter/anus. Don't make the mistake of ONLY using kegels. I alternate the muscles and it makes the feelings more varied. Another thing I noticed with the dildo is that making little circles with the toy is 5x better than just sliding it in and out. I never managed to do anything similar with my internal muscles (as opposed to my wrist), but I imagine kegel training REALLY pays off. Not just having strong muscles, but also better control and muscle separation. Using kegels and sphincter separately comes naturally. People with better training may be able to produce a circular motion of aneros without using a hand. If you have nothing better to do, train your kegels between session days.

Posted by: @divine_o

you’re French... Canadian?

I’m Swiss, from the French speaking part.

Posted by: @rodward

Now that i said this, i know i have few things to experiment again, trying to masturbate before a session to grow the excitation and prostate, and see if using my mental would make my body going in the right direction.

Hi and welcome to the forum!

As far as I understood your postings, you're already aware of your prostate and can sense when it's growing and getting excited. This is a wonderful thing. I always feel a certain buzz down there, which I put my focus on. One member here described the feeling as an inward pointing erection despite of his limp member. Playfully exploring the sensitivity of my testicles recently, I noticed that this feeling became stronger. Other hot spots of mine are my perineum and especially that little hollow part just in front of my sphincter. Caressing these spots heightens my arousal and lets my prostate get engorged too. Masturbation with penile focus I wouldn't recommend, instead I'd suggest to playfully explore your body for spots which add something to that dumb humming, buzzing or vibrating feeling in your prostate area.

To help you with your mindset and your envision I'd most warmly recommend Mantak Chia's "L'énergie sexuelle masculine". Especially for young men this book offers some recipes to handle and lead their bubbly energy and provides intelligible techniques to separate orgasms from ejaculations. Furthermore it explains why every ejaculation is draining so much of your energy. After all it's been the book that helped me most with my journey.

If it isn't too nosy, how did it came, that you've already considered to try prostate massage at the age of 17?

Good luck and good vibes! Mart

Thank you very much for your answers

Yes, i do know when my prostate's being stimulated, and this is why most of the time i don't feel like it, i feel like the massage is more like stimulating the rectum or nothing than the prostate itself, but that's just maybe a feeling ..

And well, i began to be "sexually active" around 12-13 years old, and actually enjoying this a lot. I've been wanting pretty quickly enough to try different and new things, new positions to masturbate, discover anal pleasure a bit, and that's how i fell onto the prostate stimulation on the web, pleasure, and then the potential Prostate orgasm. This gave me chill when i've read the feedbacks and sensations about it, being able to feel pleasure without refractory period, with more intensity and longer made me want to try it out. I think it's because i may have a really high sex drive, compared to the ""normal and average"" 

The few divine sensations (but too rare :c ) i've felt made me realize how much deep, "pure" and high the pleasure could get, and so that famous legend can actually be real, but sadly it's taking lot of time and not always progressing from my side, even just to feel a single spark of good satisfying pleasure. My sessions are more like relaxation than prostate massage i feel because i'm not feeling much pleasure these weeks, but i'm still trying and keeping it on, even if, i'm not going to hide it, i'm feeling really depressed and disappointed when i don't get pleasure in a long period of time after many sessions with every conditions .. And this is normal i believe, but i'm working on it and trying to discover new paths and improving, maybe i'm doing something wrong ..

Okay, I'll try keep it short:

1. Do a good enema, so with a modest amount of lube the toy easily moves inside. I apply lube 3-4 times: add lube, put it in, contract a bunch of times, pull out and re-lube. I usually don't add lube after start of the session (no need with silicone).

2. Try a bunch of positions until you find one that makes you feel something inside when you contract kegel muscles and sphincter. On your back, on your side, doggy, legs straight, wide apart, bent in knees, on floor with legs on bed, knees on floor body on bed...

3. Build upon that spot. Keep massaging that spot for a couple of minutes without changing position. After it stops being fun, find another position that makes you feel something and stay on that for several minutes...

4. Initially, you make the most progress in days, not in hours. That means your body needs time to adapt. Making a 2hour session instead of two 1 hour sessions on Monday and Wednesday is much worse! It's like with learning or physical exercise.

You should find that after a few sessions the sensations get stronger. With your new sensitivity, you have the ability to improve your positions more easily. For me, small changes make a big difference.

Posted by: @rodward

maybe i'm doing something wrong ..

Thanks for your open answers. To me it looks like your juvenile mind might still be chasing your luck instead of let the bliss find you. If you like to follow @airbag 's profound suggestions, it's important to distinguish between actively and willingly changing positions or following an inner urge to do so. The more you listen to subtle needs the more you can understand what your prostate wants. I indeed talk to my prostate in an inner dialogue and tell my prostate mind what I want and what it shall provide me and, believe it or not, writing down this already sends warm shivers throughout my whole body. 

Good luck and best wishes, Mart