Funny "TIFU" story from Reddit

I saw this today on Reddit and had to come share it here. Pretty hilarious, if it's all true.:

I am a 100% straight male, happily married for 2 years. Before we married
my wife was asking me about ass play and trying to push me to try it. I
said I would think about it and we dropped the topic for a while. She
enjoys anal and wanted to share the pleasure. I was against it and I
could tell it bothered her a bit.

About 18 months after we married I was getting really bad headaches.
Doctors couldn't figure out what it was but my wide was worried. (this
is important later). I was talking to my brother about it and he told me
he used to get stressed out and get bad headaches too. He started to
meditate and do "sex stuff" (i.e. prostate massage) to better relax.

I decided to get a prostate massager to see if that would help with
my headaches and, as an added bonus, try to accommodate my wife's
desires.

I bought an Aneros prostate massager and decided to get used to it to
surprise my wife on our second anniversary. I would try it a few times
when she went out with friends but didn't really feel relaxed. The
directions say you should relax your breathing and meditate while you
get used to having this thing shoved up your ass.

My wife left for an afternoon of shopping with her friends one
Saturday and so I took out my toy, put in my ear plugs to play a
meditation tape to help me relax and figure out the mechanics of the
toy. So, I'm laying in bed, have my toy properly placed and lubed while
listening to mellow music in a meditation tape through my headphones.
After a while I succeeded in getting my first HUGE orgasm. I mean I am
shaking and convulsing like I never have before- complete loss of
control of my body. It was AMAZING... until my wife walked in.

So my wife walks in and sees her husband ( who has a history of bad
headaches) convulsing under the sheets in the bed. She thinks "seizure!"
and calls 911 while crying in fear. I'm oblivious since I have the ear
buds in and am out of my mind with a super orgasm.

My wife comes over and starts frantically shaking me, asking me
what's wrong and am I okay while 911 is on the line. She pulls out my
ear buds and I am returning to normal to see my wife in a full blown
panic and so I start to freak out because I think something is wrong
with her. I jumped up out of bed to see what I can do to help and this
look of "WTF" comes over her face. She yells "whats wrong?? what's
happening??" as I stand there buck naked, obviously aroused and shaking
legs due to my prior euphoric state.

Meanwhile, I am asking her what is wrong and why are you home now-
are you okay. This continues for about a minute until we both realize
the other one is okay... while 911 is on the line. I tell my wife I am
fine and she tells 911 to disregard her call. Well, they can't because
when 911 is called, they are required to send someone to check out what
is happening.

We get our wits about ourselves, catch our breath and she tells me
how her friend wasn't feeling well and so they cut their shopping trip
short. She called my cell to say she was on the way home and I didn't
answer. She came into the house, called my name and heard no response.
She came upstairs and saw me convulsing in the bed (my super-o) and
thought I was having a seizure (because of my earlier bad headaches)

A rescue squad and fire truck show up, come in to check out the scene
and my wife explains she called because she thought I was having a
seizure but I was okay. By this time I have a pair of shorts and a shirt
on but am still shaking from the big O and the adrenaline rush. one EMT
asks if I am okay, can he take my BP, what happened, etc.

I realize I have to come clean and tell him and my wife what I was
doing. To his credit, the EMT maintained a professional demeanor and
advised I be more careful in the future, closed his notebook and left.

Then the neighbors started to ask what happened, is everyone okay,
why were the rescue squad and firetruck here, etc. My wife just said I
was having a seizure but it's fine now.

We can laugh now but we still can't maintain eye contact with our neighbors.

TL;DR- Secretly tried out my prostate massager but attracted the attnetion of the Rescue Squad and my neighbors

EDIT: I read some of the comments on here and want to clarify I am
not a shill for Aneros. I have no financial interest in their business. I
just call it "Aneros" like I call tissues "Kleenex." There are plenty
of other brands out there so please look at the others as well since
they may be a better fit (no pun intended)

https://us.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2fgaz8/tifu_by_trying_out_my_new_aneros_when_my_wife_was/