I can’t go anywhere else to talk about my experience with prostate exploration, but I feel like I need to write it down somewhere.

While I cannot recall how I heard about and started looking into Aneros, maybe 2 years ago I was using the Aneros (forget which model, but it was a syn version. Maybe syn helix) and wondering if it was all made up. However, through various rabbit holes I discovered the mindgasm app, and was using that app one night (after starting with a shibby sound file), and started to have experiences that I can only assume were prostate feelings.

I try to be quite a religious person, and I think maybe because of this, or maybe because of just being human, generally I don’t feel energized or happy after finishing a regular masturbation session. Things like shibby and pornography have a short term pleasure, but don’t end up leading to engagement with any sort of continuing fulfillment or enrichment of my life. I don’t care for how crude and crass a lot of the verbiage of people describing their experience with Aneros and prostate exploration for similar reasons. These things generally don’t inspire me to be a better person, and don’t lead to a sense of fulfillment I’ve found elsewhere in my life. Which is why the contrast with this experience with the Aneros and the mindgasm app is so surprising to me.

I lack the proper words to adequately describe what the experience with the Aneros that night was like, but I’ll try my best. Because of my succumbing to shibby prior to this session, I was already very aroused, and the Aneros started to feel like it was scratching that prostate “itch”. The description is apt. Slowly over the course of the music playing and the aneros use, the itch started turning into a small tingle, somewhat similar to what you feel post foot falling asleep, but without the pin prick pain. Other times I’ve felt something similar are when I’ve gotten chills from listening to beautiful music, or eating incredible food. Usually in those instances, however, the feeling is broad and fleeting, spreading over the whole body, making the hair on my skin raise momentarily, and then quickly dissipating.

In this instance, the “chill” started locally, near the prostate, but hard to pinpoint exactly. Instead of quickly fading, it maintained its presence, and then slowly grew until it spread to a greater portion of the body. At the same time, with my eyes closed I started to develop what I can only describe now as a deeper level of focus. I felt like my consciousness had been slowly dropped into a state that allowed me to narrow my focus into what I believe the concept of a third eye embodies. My mind was less distracted than it had been in my life, and I started envisioning shapes and colors that seemed real to me. I’m not a creative person, and this sort of mindful engagement surprised me, and the experience continues to be surprising to me. Maybe this is what people who are more creative are experiencing when they’re creating art and can envision abstract ideas.

I am not calling attention to the focus as a way to hone in on any particular “pleasurable” aspect of the Aneros or experience, but more to say what I think had to be associated with the experience to have the feelings that I did.

This was maybe 10-20 minutes in this state, the “visions” constantly changing and swirling in my mind. (As I write this now, it sounds to me like the railings of an insane person.) The tingling feeling started to grow, and morph into a feeling of warmth, which started to spread and cover a larger portion of the body. Soon, the warmth became a burning heat, and started matching my heartbeat. The pulses of warmth and tingles grew and amplified with the heartbeats, and the visions grew more intense in character. Soon, the tingles turned to almost shocks, and I could feel it start in my prostate, the shock feeling similar to when, as a kid, I would put 9volt batteries on my tongue. These lasted in a pulsing feeling for 20-30 seconds, and tingles remained, but the heat started to subside, the visions dimmed, and I was less engaged in the experience.

I got up and removed the Aneros, but then still could feel tingles. Mostly good feelings subsided, but the tingles remained. For the next 3-4 days, a brush of a hand on my neck would make my hair raise over my whole body. Things like whispers for ASMR would cause a similar reaction. Music all of the sudden was deeper and richer. Instead of one instrument dominating the track, or the vocal taking center stage, I suddenly noticed the whole combination of instruments and vocalizations combining together. These sorts of things started to elicit what I can only refer to as a visceral, emotional reaction, unlike any experiences I had had before.

A less great side effect of all of this was that I always felt like I had to urinate. It felt like I was leaking urine at any given moment, and I was worried that I was going to be at work with a large urine stain on my pants at any moment.

I tried without success to replicate the experience over the next few days. The depth of music and chills from soft clothes or the touch of another person faded slowly, until they became just a memory. Unfortunately, I’ve not come close to having a similar experience. I became so frustrated in my pursuit of the experience that I threw away my aneros.

Recently, I found myself on the Aneros site again, buying another model (whatever the new one is with adjustable tabs). I cannot stop myself from chasing the dragon that I experienced before, but still haven’t gotten close at all. I can feel the itch when I use it, but that’s it. I know that THC probably causes similar experiences to what I had, and could jump start the experience, but I don’t trust myself to engage responsibly with those drugs (I need to be responsible for my kids and provide for my wife), and also don’t want to use them because of my religious preferences.

I’m not entirely sure why I wrote this. Maybe I’m hoping someone can provide me perspective? Help me know what my next step should be given my preferences and situation? Maybe I’m hopeful that I can provide a feeling of similarity for someone else who had a similar experience and has similar lifestyle circumstances. I know that, while arousing, as I said, the crude nature of many of the posts doesn’t help me feel good about what I’m after. The depth of life experience after that night is what keeps me coming back. I felt inspired and awake, engaged with those around me. Maybe this post can be helpful for others to try and achieve a similar result.