• 9-9-2019 – SR #4 Expecting nothing

    Started with 15 minutes guided meditation. Nice relaxed session. No hard on. Caught myself chasing feelings when they built up, trying not to do that. I did pretty good one time, trying to just stay where I was. Kind of a overall “warm” feeling sort of thing. Couldn’t stay there long, but at least I tried. I think when I get aroused feelings I build or chase them. I need to NOT do that, so trying to just let go and let whatever happen. So different from a normal orgasm.

    About 45-50 minutes in I almost fell asleep. I let it happen, stopped moving, stopped touching. Not sure if I really went to sleep or just a hyper relaxed state. But the one track ended and I came out of it. I felt pretty aroused then, probably chased again. Really need to just ride the balloon, let it take me wherever.

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